Overcoming Lust

Netgear · Apr 3, 2018

Its not easy. Overcoming lust. Its been a lifelong battle for me and i still have not got it in check.

Have you overcome it? How?

For me, i honestly feel like God is ignoring my constant pleas for help on the matter. I am not a faithful servant though. I fail miserably. I try, but i fail.

Dave-W · Apr 3, 2018

Please define what you are calling "lust."

It seems everyone has a different idea of what it is.

Netgear · Apr 3, 2018

Lust for me, is, sexually lusting, wanting, another woman i know. Its wrong because she is married. Yes, we have had intercourse many times. I dont know how to stop.

Dave-W · Apr 3, 2018

Sexual desire is normal and not sinful lust.

BUT:

Having sex with a woman married to someone else is ADULTERY.
That one is right in the middle of the "Thou Shalt Not's."

I submit it is not something you can break on your own, otherwise you would have done so already. You will need professional help. Find a good bible based family counselor.

Shempster · Apr 3, 2018

Remember that part of the problem is the hormones that are present in all of us. The thought of sex is natural and God-given.
Here's the problem:
People tend to look at others like objects for use, ridicule, scorn, ect. and that is because they don't see other people as individuals that are the creation of God.
As soon as you begin to view women as your own sister, you begin to think of protecting and preserving them rather than using them.

DogmaHunter · Apr 3, 2018

Netgear said:
Lust for me, is, sexually lusting, wanting, another woman i know. Its wrong because she is married. Yes, we have had intercourse many times. I dont know how to stop.

It's actually kind of easy.

Just keep your pants on and your zipper shut.

Netgear · Apr 3, 2018

DogmaHunter said:
It's actually kind of easy.

Just keep your pants on and your zipper shut.

Obviously. Thanks

DogmaHunter · Apr 3, 2018

Netgear said:
Obviously. Thanks

Honestly, is it really harder then that?

The "I couldn't help myself", is about the lamest excuse someone can give to fool around with someone else's wife. Or anyone else, for that matter.

It's actually a lot easier to not do it. You have to literally not do something.
What could be easier then doing nothing?

ananda · Apr 3, 2018

Netgear said:
Its not easy. Overcoming lust. Its been a lifelong battle for me and i still have not got it in check.

Have you overcome it? How?

For me, i honestly feel like God is ignoring my constant pleas for help on the matter. I am not a faithful servant though. I fail miserably. I try, but i fail.

This & this is how I work against it.

Netgear · Apr 3, 2018

DogmaHunter said:
Honestly, is it really harder then that?

The "I couldn't help myself", is about the lamest excuse someone can give to fool around with someone else's wife. Or anyone else, for that matter.

It's actually a lot easier to not do it. You have to literally not do something.
What could be easier then doing nothing?

I thank God you are not in my shoes. Glad you are so confident in how easy it is.

Southernscotty · Apr 3, 2018

I am praying for you Netgear and lust can be many different things for different people like Dave said . I think if all men everywhere told the truth, They would all have to say they have, or do, lust after sex. It is very common. The areas us christians suffer, is that we know from the Word that the thought is as bad as the action itself. Just know Brother that you are not alone in your struggles and many, many men face this.
Have you ask God to deliver you from this ?

Netgear · Apr 4, 2018

Southernscotty said:
I am praying for you Netgear and lust can be many different things for different people like Dave said . I think if all men everywhere told the truth, They would all have to say they have, or do, lust after sex. It is very common. The areas us christians suffer, is that we know from the Word that the thought is as bad as the action itself. Just know Brother that you are not alone in your struggles and many, many men face this.
Have you ask God to deliver you from this ?

Thank you.

Yes, i have asked God many times indeed.

DogmaHunter · Apr 4, 2018

Netgear said:
I thank God you are not in my shoes. Glad you are so confident in how easy it is.

What is it about your shoes, that makes you "uncontrollable" to the extent that you make an appointment with someone, take off your clothes and engage in the physical effort to have sex?

I'm sorry, but I have no understanding at all for the "i couldn't help myself" excuse when it comes to this.

You CAN help yourself. Easily. You just don't want to.
Take responsability for your actions.

You're talking about it as if it was an accident that you couldn't stop or something.

dayhiker · Apr 4, 2018

Yes, when I finally understood what Jesus was calling lust (coveting) then I realized I wasn't lusting any more.

dayhiker · Apr 4, 2018

So Netgear ... how can you put distance between you and that woman?

Netgear · Apr 4, 2018

DogmaHunter said:
What is it about your shoes, that makes you "uncontrollable" to the extent that you make an appointment with someone, take off your clothes and engage in the physical effort to have sex?

I'm sorry, but I have no understanding at all for the "i couldn't help myself" excuse when it comes to this.

You CAN help yourself. Easily. You just don't want to.
Take responsability for your actions.

You're talking about it as if it was an accident that you couldn't stop or something.

You are amazing. Wish i had your strength

Netgear · Apr 4, 2018

dayhiker said:
So Netgear ... how can you put distance between you and that woman?

Good question. Its very complicated.

DogmaHunter · Apr 5, 2018

Netgear said:
You are amazing. Wish i had your strength

I'm not "stronger" then anyone else.

To not sleep around with someone is just as easy as not stealing a motorcycle that just stands somewhere with the keys on the ignition.

There's no such thing as "we accidentally had sex".
There's no such thing as "we had sex because we couldn't control our bodies".

Personally, I don't mind off course. Sleep with whomever you wish for all I care (although sleeping with someone who's already in a relationship, married or otherwise, is seriously unethical). But be honest about it. Don't come crying that it was "an accident" or "uncontrollable" or that "it couldn't be avoided".

That's utter nonsense. You knew very well what you were about to do. You were very aware of the decision you made to go through with it. It was a conscious choice, a decision, to engage in a specific act. A decision that you could have easily walked away from, if you wanted to.

But you didn't.

I'm not saying your should apologize for it. I'm not even saying you should regret it. That's all upto you. I'm just saying: be honest about it. Don't come with lame excuses that make no sense.

You did what you did and you were fully aware of what you were doing while you were doing it. You could have decided against it, but you choose to go through with it anyway.

That is fully your responsability. You didn't slip and fall on her.

Mountainmanbob · Apr 5, 2018

Netgear said:
Its wrong because she is married. Yes, we have had intercourse many times. I dont know how to stop.

Do whatever you have to do so as to stop as soon as possible. Caution you are in very dangerous territory. What would happen if you died before you could repent? Serious thoughts for the one that is a believer.
M-Bob

dayhiker · Apr 5, 2018

Netgear ... I think you should confess to her husband that you took something from him that belongs to him. One part of this is that you have secrets that brings shame to you and the excitement of sneaking round. Bring it out in the open and much of its power will fall away.

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