Hi, whilst I respect your advice in a marriage just under tension it sounds like there is systematic abuse going on here. Hopefully it isn't but it sure looks like it.
Calling for someone to submit more during that is dangerous for both of them. It is also enabling the husband to continue sinning.
I do not know what to suggest to her but calling for more effort to submit doesn't solve abusive situations. Online there is plenty of evidence to back that up.
One such article, there are many saying the same things, from different denominations.
Wife Abuse: The Tragic Misconception of Submission
While I agree there are certain boundaries and situations in which a wife must take certain measures, ultimately I believe we must try our best to follow what God has taught.
Also, one trap that we can fall into as 3rd parties (you and me) to a situation like this is that it's easy to side with the most outspoken person. I'm not trying to make a judgment on this particular case (so no offense OP!), but more often than not marital conflicts have fairly equal portions of blame for a situation.
You and I do not have all the facts of this particular situation, and while it may seem clear on the surface as to what the problem is, it's possible that we're just biased.
For all we know, he could feel neglected and emotionally abused in ways.
From what it sounds like though, yes he seems to be impatient and a little arrogant with certain things and unappreciative. But unless I missed something, I didn't see any physical abuse mentioned.
Christ teaches us to do the right thing no matter what...even if people don't deserve it. Jesus didn't deserve to suffer mockery and brutality, but He was righteous.
I know this is a sensitive topic, and a lot of people will disagree with me, i'm just trying to show what GOD has to say about the matter.
1 Peter 3:1-2 "In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that
even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior."
I'm just quoting scripture, that's not my personal opinion. For matters of annoyance within a marriage, or being unappreciated, or given a lot of work to do...it seems the best thing to do is keep your head down and try to keep working hard with love and respect as your attitude--because even if your spouse doesn't recognize it--GOD WILL!
. He threatened to sell the TV last time and also something else I use in the house. Because most of it was bought or given to him by his family, he figures he can do whatever he wants. He also controls my computer access...I have no authority to make my own account so he can turn off the internet or computer access altogether. He also installed this onto my own laptop so when I was looking for a job before, I would "only look at job sites". but once I was working he refused to take any controls off.
