Has Marriage become irrelevant?

it's written in the bible so it's important

LORDofW4RRIOR said:

it's written in the bible so it's important

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To believers, to the saved , to the elect, yes.
And to all others for any reason they have (and even if for no reason) if they honor marriage as YHVH says - their lives will be blessed by YHVH.

UnseenSaviour said:

Do people no longer see it as a life-long commitment or something of importance?

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"People" as in society people, mankind, are pernicious as written in Galatians.
"Death dealing" seeking to drag down everyone in sin to be judged guilty and lose their lives.

I refuse to marry anyone unless they come counsel with me first and I explain that this is a special Covenant before God and is holy and the two will become one flesh. I make sure to get it into their heads the foundation of starting and remaining in Jesus Christ, and that building on Him is the only way to have a happy, peaceful and joy filled marriage.
You would be surprised the people that do not know this very basic elementary teaching. When you explain this to them, They are in wide eyed wonderment.
I believe this is why people do not take marriage seriously because they do not understand scripture nor God's will. In fact, many don't even recognize their "place" in a marriage.

Considering how much politicians seem to care about it, how could it be?

UnseenSaviour said:

Do people no longer see it as a life-long commitment or something of importance?

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Not everyone has the same perspective on marriage. As such asking what "people" think on the subject is basically impossible.

I consider matrimony a sacred union of two people who are intentionally entering into a commitment with one another, and as such would consider my [hypothetical] marriage incredibly important and a life-long commitment to another person and to the family we might bring into the world. But then my view on marriage is informed by my religion. Not everyone is a Christian, and therefore not everyone is going to share my perspective on the subject and I can't expect them to.

-CryptoLutheran

Southernscotty said:

I refuse to marry anyone unless they come counsel with me first and I explain that this is a special Covenant before God and is holy and the two will become one flesh. I make sure to get it into their heads the foundation of starting and remaining in Jesus Christ, and that building on Him is the only way to have a happy, peaceful and joy filled marriage.
You would be surprised the people that do not know this very basic elementary teaching. When you explain this to them, They are in wide eyed wonderment.
I believe this is why people do not take marriage seriously because they do not understand scripture nor God's will. In fact, many don't even recognize their "place" in a marriage.

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That may be what you believe, but for me, the most important thing before two people get married is to know that they love one another. When married their love can grow and with it a respect and trust for one another and they can achieve that without worrying if their marriage is pleasing to some third party.
I do take my marriage seriously because it involves the people I love most in this world, my wife, my children and my grandchildren and they have brought peace, joy and happiness in abundance to the marriage.
What do you mean when you say that some people don't even know their "place" in a marriage?
What "place" is that?

Par5 said:

What do you mean when you say that some people don't even know their "place" in a marriage?
What "place" is that?

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I'm guessing "biblical" gender roles. Note the intentional scare quotes.

-CryptoLutheran

ViaCrucis said:

I'm guessing "biblical" gender roles. Note the intentional scare quotes.

-CryptoLutheran

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I would agree with you on that.

UnseenSaviour said:

Do people no longer see it as a life-long commitment or something of importance?

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I suspect this is an issue that can not be summarized as ''Do people no longer...". That is because marriage is really a personal issue which has many facets including legally, socially, and theologically.

Par5 said:

I would agree with you on that.

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Why Yes that would be correct. That "third Party" as stated above just happens to be the author of love. In fact, Real love AGAPE love. Bless You and sorry I just found this thread, Been fishing.

ViaCrucis said:

I'm guessing "biblical" gender roles. Note the intentional scare quotes.

-CryptoLutheran

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LOL, The place a man and woman should fulfill. A wife is to be a wife, A husband is to be a husband. Last time I checked this was "Right" :]

Southernscotty said:

LOL, The place a man and woman should fulfill. A wife is to be a wife, A husband is to be a husband. Last time I checked this was "Right" :]

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I suspect that cases of people getting confused, and husbands thinking they are wives, or wives thinking they are husbands approaches absolute zero.

But I still also suspect that this is still a vague reference to some kind of marital/gender hierarchy with men on top and women on the bottom, with a few biblical proof texts thrown in to give such a system a false air of divinely established order. My guess is probably a quote from Ephesians 5:22 while ignoring Ephesians 5:21.

-CryptoLutheran

Par5 said:

That may be what you believe, but for me, the most important thing before two people get married is to know that they love one another. When married their love can grow and with it a respect and trust for one another and they can achieve that without worrying if their marriage is pleasing to some third party.
I do take my marriage seriously because it involves the people I love most in this world, my wife, my children and my grandchildren and they have brought peace, joy and happiness in abundance to the marriage.
What do you mean when you say that some people don't even know their "place" in a marriage?
What "place" is that?

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Men have a duty to protect and love their wife. A woman has a duty to love and submit to her husband.
What is wrong with that? It's a biblical viewpoint and I hold "strong" to it. There are some more of those scare quotes. lol Thats funny

ViaCrucis said:

I suspect that cases of people getting confused, and husbands thinking they are wives, or wives thinking they are husbands approaches absolute zero.

But I still also suspect that this is still a vague reference to some kind of marital/gender hierarchy with men on top and women on the bottom, with a few biblical proof texts thrown in to give such a system a false air of divinely established order. My guess is probably a quote from Ephesians 5:22 while ignoring Ephesians 5:21.

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You can suspect what you want and you would be correct if you suspect I believe what is plainly written in the KJV scripture. It's my rulebook for living and if it offends people then they should think about why it offends them?
I won't apologize for speaking truth because with truth comes conviction.
With that being said I will not marry anyone without sitting down with them first and explaining the truth to them and if they are offended and choose to find another pastor then ok. I wish them the best and open the door for them to leave.

Southernscotty said:

Men have a duty to protect and love their wife. A woman has a duty to love and submit to her husband.
What is wrong with that? It's a biblical viewpoint and I hold "strong" to it. There are some more of those scare quotes. lol Thats funny

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The biblical view point is mutual submission in love. It isn't one-sided. That's why I put "biblical" in scare quotes, because the biblical position is that Christians are called to empty themselves, pour themselves out, in love and service to others; ultimately to have "the same mind in you that was in Christ Jesus". When the Apostle says that husbands are to love their wives, laying down their lives for them, it is a call to servanthood; in imitation of the Son of Man who "came not to be served, but to serve". The Christian calling to put others ahead of ourselves, the needs of others ahead of our needs. To love even as Christ loved us, holding nothing back, and giving everything--expecting nothing in return.

That entire point is demolished by insisting that husbands are on top and women at the bottom. That isn't how any interpersonal relationship is supposed to function in the Church; the call, the command, the vocation of every Christian is that of humility, submission, service, and love to others. The command is not, "You shall serve me" it is, "I shall serve you". It's no big deal to say "Wives, submit to your husbands" the radical turning of social order on its head is when Paul tells husbands to abandon themselves in service to their wives. Likewise, it is no big deal to say, "Children, honor your parents" but Paul then calls on parents to put their children first. It is no big deal to say, "Slaves, obey your masters." But then Paul flips it, telling masters to be slaves to their own slaves.

Because the way of God's kingdom isn't that the first shall be first, but that last shall be first and the first shall be last; that the greatest in God's kingdom is the slave. God's kingdom is the world turned upside down, in which God Himself has revealed Himself not through power, glory, or strength--but weakness and humility in the crucified Jesus. As the Apostle himself says, that God chose the foolish things of the world to confound the wise, and He chose the weak things of the world to confound the strong. God's way is not through the exercise of power and dominance, but kenosis. God pouring Himself out, emptying Himself, God throwing Himself away in love. For who? The worthy? The righteous? The great? No, "But while we were still sinners, Christ died for us", God throws Himself away in love for the unworthy, for the unlovely, the unwanted, the undeserving, the wicked, the ungrateful, the unloving. God comes and throws Himself upon a cross. And that's the way of God, that's the shape of God's kingdom. That is God's way of being human, because that is God's way of being God.

When we seek to assert glory for ourselves we have thoroughly abandoned the cross and what it stands for. The way of the Christian is not glory, but the cross. It is to live is Christ and to die is gain. That's the Christian way, because that's God's way revealed in Christ. And that is to express itself in every dimension of Christian life as we live in this world, living out our vocations toward our neighbor in the grace and love of God which is in Jesus Christ.

-CryptoLutheran

We are not in disagreement here, You read way into my statement that I place a higher value on one individual and I don't at all. Love is mutual yes it is and the man and woman are to be equals in the eyes of God and each other. With this said. God provided the model and why is it so hard for people to follow?
Why does women and men today seek to change what God modeled and saw was good? I think there is an abundance of pride involved and people don't care what God says, They want things their way. That's wrong . We are not put here for our glory, We are put here to glorify Him

UnseenSaviour said:

Do people no longer see it as a life-long commitment or something of importance?

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I understand where you want to go. But my answer is the government will never be part of any marriage I participate in.

bugkiller

Southernscotty said:

Men have a duty to protect and love their wife. A woman has a duty to love and submit to her husband.
What is wrong with that? It's a biblical viewpoint and I hold "strong" to it. There are some more of those scare quotes. lol Thats funny

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What you say may be ok if you want a Stepford wife. I don't. I depend on my wife as much as she depends on me. It is a totally equal partnership based on love and mutual respect. You use the word submit. That is what dogs do when confronted by a more aggressive animal. They adopt a submissive posture to let the other animal know it is top dog. Wives are not dogs and neither are husbands.
I find it rather arrogant and insulting that you assume people cannot have a happy and successful
marriage unless they believe as you do, and to make matters worse it is coming from someone who is not even married, which allows me to say without fear of contradiction that you don't know what you are talking about!

I have to agree. Happy, healthy, successful, (even Christian), egalitarian marriages are possible, and there are many positive examples of such around us.

If marriage is becoming irrelevant to some, it is, in part, because it's seen as a patriarchal institution designed to control people and property (inheritance), rather than as an opportunity to grow in love and joy and grace. As Christians, we'd do well to avoid reinforcing that impression of marriage being inevitably an expression of patriarchy.