That was food for my soul!Here is my sophisticated rebuttal to the charge that church is boring:
(1) In the church where I was raised our pastor was a good preacher, but he had no sense of humor and never tried to be funny. Yet in 2 separate sermons about a year apart, he inadvertently made these 2 bloopers: (1) In a sermon on John the Baptist, he boomed: "And Jordan baptized Jesus in the John!" In a sermon on David, our pastor was giving a dramatic description of David's flight from his enemies and shouted: "And David ran to the sanctuary--and there he stood, breathless and pantless!"
Now as a kid, I found both bloopers funny enough. But what made me really lose it was the congregation's stone-faced reaction to both bloopers. They didn't seem to catch his actual words--except one guy sitting near the front for the second sermon. A few minutes after the David blooper, he turned around with a wicked grin, and then I knew he heard what I heard and I had to suppress howling with laughter! I mean, was everyone else asleep?
(2) Then there was the time when Aurilla procrastinated in buying the grape juice for our Communion service. Prune juice was available; so she bought that instead, thinking no one would notice the difference! She told no one! It's one thing to apologize and grin and bear prune juice for Communion. It's quite another thing for your taste buds to be expecting grape when you get prune!
(3) As a teen, I was sitting with my cousin near the front in my uncle's church. A large spider decided to use the little lace hat of the women sitting in front of us as the foundation for its large web. We sat spellbound by the spider's industry. When the spider was finished, we were kind enough to tap the lady on the shoulder, so she could inspect her new hat! She screamed--and no one can say that service was boring!
(4) On a hot August Sunday, the first church I pastored left the front doors open because we had no air conditioning. A big black cat strolled in see what was happening, and got the tip of his tail caught in the fan. He uttered a loud meow and leapt forward, jolting my whole congregation awake!
(5) On another occasion, a large bat was asleep attached high up the wall on the side of the sanctuary. He was too high up to reach with a broom, so the ushers decided to let me be, since he wasn't bothering anyone. Well, when I preach, I get blessed and truth is measured in decibels! My preaching woke up the bat and he started dive bombing the ladies in the front row!
(6) In one the churches I pastored, the sound system was for some reason tuned in to the phone of Mabel, the feisty old woman who lived next door to the church. This meant that Mabel's phone conversations sometimes interrupted me during the service. I asked the trustees to fix the problem, but evidently they like the humor of the interruptions and did nothing. Once I was in the midst of the climax of my sermon and thought I was spell-binding them with my climactic thought. Just then Mabel's voice came though: "That's the most ridiculous thing I ever heard!" The people howled and I had to respond to Mabel as if she was critiquing my sermon! btw. when Mabel finally was informed that we were eavesdropping on her phone calls, she was mortified and stopped making calls during our service.
Sometimes church goes so wrong in a way that goes so right. When it does, church is not boring.
some sporadic anecdotes but daily, church is ... sing, pray, and hear sitting for 40min-2hrs. and i can't stand that, i need to move, to make something different, i meditate in the lord's word day and night and pray every day, but church is not for me. Missions are for me.Here is my sophisticated rebuttal to the charge that church is boring:
(1) In the church where I was raised our pastor was a good preacher, but he had no sense of humor and never tried to be funny. Yet in 2 separate sermons about a year apart, he inadvertently made these 2 bloopers: (1) In a sermon on John the Baptist, he boomed: "And Jordan baptized Jesus in the John!" In a sermon on David, our pastor was giving a dramatic description of David's flight from his enemies and shouted: "And David ran to the sanctuary--and there he stood, breathless and pantless!"
Now as a kid, I found both bloopers funny enough. But what made me really lose it was the congregation's stone-faced reaction to both bloopers. They didn't seem to catch his actual words--except one guy sitting near the front for the second sermon. A few minutes after the David blooper, he turned around with a wicked grin, and then I knew he heard what I heard and I had to suppress howling with laughter! I mean, was everyone else asleep?
(2) Then there was the time when Aurilla procrastinated in buying the grape juice for our Communion service. Prune juice was available; so she bought that instead, thinking no one would notice the difference! She told no one! It's one thing to apologize and grin and bear prune juice for Communion. It's quite another thing for your taste buds to be expecting grape when you get prune!
(3) As a teen, I was sitting with my cousin near the front in my uncle's church. A large spider decided to use the little lace hat of the women sitting in front of us as the foundation for its large web. We sat spellbound by the spider's industry. When the spider was finished, we were kind enough to tap the lady on the shoulder, so she could inspect her new hat! She screamed--and no one can say that service was boring!
(4) On a hot August Sunday, the first church I pastored left the front doors open because we had no air conditioning. A big black cat strolled in see what was happening, and got the tip of his tail caught in the fan. He uttered a loud meow and leapt forward, jolting my whole congregation awake!
(5) On another occasion, a large bat was asleep attached high up the wall on the side of the sanctuary. He was too high up to reach with a broom, so the ushers decided to let me be, since he wasn't bothering anyone. Well, when I preach, I get blessed and truth is measured in decibels! My preaching woke up the bat and he started dive bombing the ladies in the front row!
(6) In one the churches I pastored, the sound system was for some reason tuned in to the phone of Mabel, the feisty old woman who lived next door to the church. This meant that Mabel's phone conversations sometimes interrupted me during the service. I asked the trustees to fix the problem, but evidently they like the humor of the interruptions and did nothing. Once I was in the midst of the climax of my sermon and thought I was spell-binding them with my climactic thought. Just then Mabel's voice came though: "That's the most ridiculous thing I ever heard!" The people howled and I had to respond to Mabel as if she was critiquing my sermon! btw. when Mabel finally was informed that we were eavesdropping on her phone calls, she was mortified and stopped making calls during our service.
Sometimes church goes so wrong in a way that goes so right. When it does, church is not boring.
evangelical catholic. how is thatI don't expect church to be entertaining. I watch Netflix for that.
evangelical catholic. how is that
Apart from a very occasional visit in odd places to test the waters, my wife and I haven't been to church for over ten years.some sporadic anecdotes but daily, church is ... sing, pray, and hear sitting for 40min-2hrs. and i can't stand that, i need to move, to make something different, i meditate in the lord's word day and night and pray every day, but church is not for me. Missions are for me.
it's a matter of choices. some people likes the mobI prefer small groups. I like the personal engagement. It's much more interesting to hear insights and flash points from a number of people, than hear one person deliver an hour long monologue.