First time

com7fy8 · Jan 9, 2018

I agree that God does use mature people to help younger Christians. And God personally satisfies us about what He really wants.

So, if you're not sure, keep growing in Jesus and keep seeking God for Himself, and see how you become about this. And deeply appreciate whoever you have whom you trust.

It seems to me that a number of people even fall in love with one another, but they do not trust each other. And in the United States we have a fifty-percent divorce rate. So, falling in love and being attracted might not be reliable. But if you are growing with each other and helping one another to get closer to God and love any and all people like Jesus wants, I think this is important in Christian love > your relating helps you to learn how to love any and all people and to have compassion about each other's faults, but you help each other to get stronger in love so you overcome problems. I think you should be able to help each other, and trust each other so you can talk about different things.

You seem to be saying that he is not ready to talk with you about this. I think it is good for a man to become able to communicate about things like this. If he is not, then give him time to grow and mature, then see what he is ready to talk about, if you are still interested. God will give you both assurance and agreement, I think, if you belong with each other.

But make sure about whom you go to for help. Church culture people can jump to conclusions, just because people look good together. Whole groups can get the same idea. But we need our mature mentors who are not only looking for romance and excitement . . . and gossip

You can use this to learn how to make sure about God's will for you. Because all through your life you will need to make sure with God about different things. So, it is good to be able to do this, to be reliable in being guided by God.

Grip Docility · Jan 9, 2018

Godicon22 said:
Amen! Thank u my mentor advise the same too. I think i should only hope in God and no one else still Hes in control. Thank u!

Indeed. You are correct to wait on God and not push things along.

Above all matters... make sure that whoever it is... you can absoloustly be your genuine self around them and they can be their genuine self.

Never desire any “change” in a person and always understand... what you know in your soul is usually spot on.

If you are both devoted to God and there is a growing mutual attraction... I pray the best outcome for both of you.

Compromise, heartache and great joy... naturally come with the territory.

There is flipside to this coin...

A person can pray to win the Lotto every day... but if they never buy a ticket... God can only do so much.

Eventually... you or he will have to make a decision. The fear of loss is the hardest part.

But... if you could be a help mate to that man and assist him in his academic journey... it sounds like he may be making the first move.

I pray God’s will for you above all... that it grows or goes accordingly.

All the best to you...

Citizen of the Kingdom · Jan 9, 2018

Grip Docility said:
...
But... if you could be a help mate to that man and assist him in his academic journey... it sounds like he may be making the first move.

I pray God’s will for you above all... that it grows or goes accordingly.

All the best to you...

God has the role of helpmate to the church as any word study will show. It may be that God's will is for him to help her. Assuming doesn't make sense in placing culture before God.

Citizen of the Kingdom · Jan 9, 2018

Dave-W said:
We are advising this young woman. The point I am making is the principle of getting outside counsel is broad and covers every area of life. THe choice whether to follow it or not is entirely up to her and she should be hearing God on this for herself. Counsel can help clarify what is from God and what is from somewhere else.

It's true that one should consider of the cost of any endeavour.

dqhall · Jan 9, 2018

Godicon22 said:
Hi! Im new to this site and just wanted to share what i have experience for over a year now. My first time experience being single since birth. Im 26 years old already and since then i never experience having a boyfriend. I was raised in a very conservative Christian family as my father being a pastor, but they are not strict for us their child having boyfriend or girlfriend i just feel i dont like having one. Since child then i pray to God and promised myself that my first boyfriend will be my man forever thats my desire. I had a lot of crushes before, men wanted to pursue... but never ever entertained them but yet being friends with them thinking that it wasnt the right time. I desire Gods will... I desire a man that comes from Him. A man who will pursue me in prayer. A man who can build me up in Him with my relationship with God. At the age 22 seems no one comes I ask God to know that man at the age 25 for sure i will be ready on that time. God never fail me He showed me a vision with a man within my side while i was in the park. Its an assurance for me that He will grant my desire even i still dont know him who he was. Im 26 now, but last year I know this man. For over 5yrs weve been in the ministry together but never noticed him. Hes so closed to me treating him as my brother. We shared a lot together even those times our journey with Christ. I just notice him just last year and I dont know when it started? Maybe it started during in our church prayer meeting when he say to me he prayed for a special prayer and i just laughing at him and never entertained him. But i was strucked when he said to my churchmate in a joke seems that hes joking that hes praying for me asking God for a lovelife. I dont understand my heart that time and trying to control it and say "Lord, hes just joking! " but after all of those things happen. Im became not normal to him. I tried to treat him just like before but hes always teasing me that where meant to be. My churchmates even all people in the church teas us because he started it. And i dont know, it wasnt my first time to have a loveteam in the church since im still single. But it was my first time having this feeling i think my heart develops on him. Then i confirm then that maybe hes the one but until now im 26 he never pursue or making such move. Hes just joking around and i wanted assurance from him. I prayed to God that maybe i am doubting now because he never pursue. Hes serious now, yes were friends but not like before. I can feel the gap between the two of us. Just waiting him to move and waiting Gods intervention in between. Hes busy studying in a bible school and maybe thats the reason. But all i ask and pray now that if hes the one i will be having that assurance but if not God will vanish this what i feel for him because all i want is Hes will. But what should i do now? Is it right to still wait on him? I dont have assurance from him, hes just always joking around. But yet still love him... Or i just cant wait? Im just impatient...maybe. Or Im just assume something. Praying for Gods will.

Maybe you could ask him to study the Bible with you and share what he has been learning in classes. If you like his interpretation, you might tell him you like him.

salt-n-light · Jan 9, 2018

Godicon22 said:
Hi! Im new to this site and just wanted to share what i have experience for over a year now. My first time experience being single since birth. Im 26 years old already and since then i never experience having a boyfriend. I was raised in a very conservative Christian family as my father being a pastor, but they are not strict for us their child having boyfriend or girlfriend i just feel i dont like having one. Since child then i pray to God and promised myself that my first boyfriend will be my man forever thats my desire. I had a lot of crushes before, men wanted to pursue... but never ever entertained them but yet being friends with them thinking that it wasnt the right time. I desire Gods will... I desire a man that comes from Him. A man who will pursue me in prayer. A man who can build me up in Him with my relationship with God. At the age 22 seems no one comes I ask God to know that man at the age 25 for sure i will be ready on that time. God never fail me He showed me a vision with a man within my side while i was in the park. Its an assurance for me that He will grant my desire even i still dont know him who he was. Im 26 now, but last year I know this man. For over 5yrs weve been in the ministry together but never noticed him. Hes so closed to me treating him as my brother. We shared a lot together even those times our journey with Christ. I just notice him just last year and I dont know when it started? Maybe it started during in our church prayer meeting when he say to me he prayed for a special prayer and i just laughing at him and never entertained him. But i was strucked when he said to my churchmate in a joke seems that hes joking that hes praying for me asking God for a lovelife. I dont understand my heart that time and trying to control it and say "Lord, hes just joking! " but after all of those things happen. Im became not normal to him. I tried to treat him just like before but hes always teasing me that where meant to be. My churchmates even all people in the church teas us because he started it. And i dont know, it wasnt my first time to have a loveteam in the church since im still single. But it was my first time having this feeling i think my heart develops on him. Then i confirm then that maybe hes the one but until now im 26 he never pursue or making such move. Hes just joking around and i wanted assurance from him. I prayed to God that maybe i am doubting now because he never pursue. Hes serious now, yes were friends but not like before. I can feel the gap between the two of us. Just waiting him to move and waiting Gods intervention in between. Hes busy studying in a bible school and maybe thats the reason. But all i ask and pray now that if hes the one i will be having that assurance but if not God will vanish this what i feel for him because all i want is Hes will. But what should i do now? Is it right to still wait on him? I dont have assurance from him, hes just always joking around. But yet still love him... Or i just cant wait? Im just impatient...maybe. Or Im just assume something. Praying for Gods will.

Lol what a jerk.

He's being childish, while you're trying to be an adult. So how does an adult treat a child? Ignore his tantrums, don't waste time on foolish convos, and teach him through being an example. Once he acts like an adult you can entertain adult conversations.

Seek first though the kingdom of God, and everything else will fall into line. Don't zoom into the details like who you're destined to be with. That's my encouragement, from one single 26 year old lady to another.

Jess Lee · Jan 9, 2018

Godicon22 said:
Hi! Im new to this site and just wanted to share what i have experience for over a year now. My first time experience being single since birth. Im 26 years old already and since then i never experience having a boyfriend. I was raised in a very conservative Christian family as my father being a pastor, but they are not strict for us their child having boyfriend or girlfriend i just feel i dont like having one. Since child then i pray to God and promised myself that my first boyfriend will be my man forever thats my desire. I had a lot of crushes before, men wanted to pursue... but never ever entertained them but yet being friends with them thinking that it wasnt the right time. I desire Gods will... I desire a man that comes from Him. A man who will pursue me in prayer. A man who can build me up in Him with my relationship with God. At the age 22 seems no one comes I ask God to know that man at the age 25 for sure i will be ready on that time. God never fail me He showed me a vision with a man within my side while i was in the park. Its an assurance for me that He will grant my desire even i still dont know him who he was. Im 26 now, but last year I know this man. For over 5yrs weve been in the ministry together but never noticed him. Hes so closed to me treating him as my brother. We shared a lot together even those times our journey with Christ. I just notice him just last year and I dont know when it started? Maybe it started during in our church prayer meeting when he say to me he prayed for a special prayer and i just laughing at him and never entertained him. But i was strucked when he said to my churchmate in a joke seems that hes joking that hes praying for me asking God for a lovelife. I dont understand my heart that time and trying to control it and say "Lord, hes just joking! " but after all of those things happen. Im became not normal to him. I tried to treat him just like before but hes always teasing me that where meant to be. My churchmates even all people in the church teas us because he started it. And i dont know, it wasnt my first time to have a loveteam in the church since im still single. But it was my first time having this feeling i think my heart develops on him. Then i confirm then that maybe hes the one but until now im 26 he never pursue or making such move. Hes just joking around and i wanted assurance from him. I prayed to God that maybe i am doubting now because he never pursue. Hes serious now, yes were friends but not like before. I can feel the gap between the two of us. Just waiting him to move and waiting Gods intervention in between. Hes busy studying in a bible school and maybe thats the reason. But all i ask and pray now that if hes the one i will be having that assurance but if not God will vanish this what i feel for him because all i want is Hes will. But what should i do now? Is it right to still wait on him? I dont have assurance from him, hes just always joking around. But yet still love him... Or i just cant wait? Im just impatient...maybe. Or Im just assume something. Praying for Gods will.

MY first boyfriend and the last, I met him in 2015 and started going out with him in 2016 when he asked me out. We are now only waiting for the right time to get married. I am now 29 years old, turning 30 this year.
I always waited for the right godly man and even thought I could be single if that was God’s will.
I had been teased about love affair also but none made an advancement and they who tried were wordly men so I never accepted.
But God sent my bf and me to each other when the time was perfect (we did not meet in the church).
At first, I thought he was already married so I just loved him as a wonderful man of God, a true follwer of Christ. I really appreciated him and I never felt this kind of attachment for someone ever before, although I did have crush before,but it was not the same.
But later, about 2 months later, God gave me a dream where I was waiting for him to be my husband. After, I asked him if he was married he said he was not. But I couldnt tell him about my dream.
Until the Lord spoke to my bf and gave him vision that I will be the one for him. We never told to each other about our feeling before. We were just good friends.
But We both got confirmation from God, who lives.

The experience may not be the same for everyone, but what I suggest is,
If the man you are talking about did not make a move yet,
And You are waiting for the one for you,
Just wait, be patient and keep praying.
Keep your trust in God.

Sketcher · Jan 9, 2018

Hard for me to advise you on him because I don't know his personality. Maybe he's fishing for something from you or otherwise battling with his own shyness. Maybe he's naturally outgoing and clowning around because that's simply what he does. Maybe he's interested, maybe he's not. I have no idea.

Derek Meyer · Jan 10, 2018

I was single at birth, too. What's your point?

Emmy · Jan 10, 2018

Dear Godicon22. In Matthew 22: 35-40: Jesus told us: The first and great Commandment is: Love God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. The second is like it, love thy neighbour as thyself. In verse 40 we are told, On these two Commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets. God is Love, and God wants loving sons and daughters. The Bible tells us: give up all thy selfish and unloving words and thoughts, start loving and caring. God is our Heavenly Father, and God wants loving men and women. In Matthew 7: 7-10: we are told: Ask and you shall receive. We ask God for Love and Compassion, then we thank God and share all love and compassion, with our neighbour. God sees our loving and caring, and God will Bless us greatly. Love will overcome all anger and thoughtless behaviour, and Satan and all his followers will disappear. Love covers all lives, and Love will always conquer every bad thoughts and behaviour. Let us all change into the sons and daughters which our Heavenly wants. Love will always be the conqueror. I say this with love, Godicon. Greetings from Emmy, your sister in Christ.

Godicon22 · Jan 10, 2018

com7fy8 said:
I agree that God does use mature people to help younger Christians. And God personally satisfies us about what He really wants.

So, if you're not sure, keep growing in Jesus and keep seeking God for Himself, and see how you become about this. And deeply appreciate whoever you have whom you trust.

It seems to me that a number of people even fall in love with one another, but they do not trust each other. And in the United States we have a fifty-percent divorce rate. So, falling in love and being attracted might not be reliable. But if you are growing with each other and helping one another to get closer to God and love any and all people like Jesus wants, I think this is important in Christian love > your relating helps you to learn how to love any and all people and to have compassion about each other's faults, but you help each other to get stronger in love so you overcome problems. I think you should be able to help each other, and trust each other so you can talk about different things.

You seem to be saying that he is not ready to talk with you about this. I think it is good for a man to become able to communicate about things like this. If he is not, then give him time to grow and mature, then see what he is ready to talk about, if you are still interested. God will give you both assurance and agreement, I think, if you belong with each other.

But make sure about whom you go to for help. Church culture people can jump to conclusions, just because people look good together. Whole groups can get the same idea. But we need our mature mentors who are not only looking for romance and excitement . . . and gossip

You can use this to learn how to make sure about God's will for you. Because all through your life you will need to make sure with God about different things. So, it is good to be able to do this, to be reliable in being guided by God.

Thank u!

Godicon22 · Jan 10, 2018

Grip Docility said:
Indeed. You are correct to wait on God and not push things along.

Above all matters... make sure that whoever it is... you can absoloustly be your genuine self around them and they can be their genuine self.

Never desire any “change” in a person and always understand... what you know in your soul is usually spot on.

If you are both devoted to God and there is a growing mutual attraction... I pray the best outcome for both of you.

Compromise, heartache and great joy... naturally come with the territory.

There is flipside to this coin...

A person can pray to win the Lotto every day... but if they never buy a ticket... God can only do so much.

Eventually... you or he will have to make a decision. The fear of loss is the hardest part.

But... if you could be a help mate to that man and assist him in his academic journey... it sounds like he may be making the first move.

I pray God’s will for you above all... that it grows or goes accordingly.

All the best to you...

Thank u!

Godicon22 · Jan 10, 2018

Amen

Jess Lee said:
MY first boyfriend and the last, I met him in 2015 and started going out with him in 2016 when he asked me out. We are now only waiting for the right time to get married. I am now 29 years old, turning 30 this year.
I always waited for the right godly man and even thought I could be single if that was God’s will.
I had been teased about love affair also but none made an advancement and they who tried were wordly men so I never accepted.
But God sent my bf and me to each other when the time was perfect (we did not meet in the church).
At first, I thought he was already married so I just loved him as a wonderful man of God, a true follwer of Christ. I really appreciated him and I never felt this kind of attachment for someone ever before, although I did have crush before,but it was not the same.
But later, about 2 months later, God gave me a dream where I was waiting for him to be my husband. After, I asked him if he was married he said he was not. But I couldnt tell him about my dream.
Until the Lord spoke to my bf and gave him vision that I will be the one for him. We never told to each other about our feeling before. We were just good friends.
But We both got confirmation from God, who lives.

The experience may not be the same for everyone, but what I suggest is,
If the man you are talking about did not make a move yet,
And You are waiting for the one for you,
Just wait, be patient and keep praying.
Keep your trust in God.
Amen!!! Thank u!

Monk Brendan · Jan 10, 2018

Godicon22 said:
Hi! Im new to this site and just wanted to share what i have experience for over a year now. My first time experience being single since birth. Im 26 years old already and since then i never experience having a boyfriend.

Get over yourself. God's timing is perfect. Just patiently wait for God, and He will provide.

Blade · Jan 10, 2018

Hi.. I know how some feel about GODS will about this kind of thing. Now what God told me when I asked was " whatever you want". God can not go against our will in ANYTHING. Not like yours but I once kissed a girl.. just once. Oh my.. she started saying how we are going to be together. I started very kindly saying.. no.. and she always kept coming back with "does not mean God won't put us together". I ended up saying.. I DONT WANT YOU.. I DONT LIKE YOU LIKE THAT! "doesnt mean God wont put us together"

well that never came to be.

Sis I am not girl lol.. been married 33y and been with Mar for about 40y. I still don't like waiting. And your kind of thoughts if I had these would be to talk to him. Talk about what he says.. if he does not mean it then in love please stop. Or if he does.. maybe act on it. Just be honest about how you feel..if you have feelings for him. Might want to get others advice on this lol.

Sis.. what do you want? God will give you the desires of your heart. He can not lie. Ask the Father..hello YOUR FATHER to confirm it to you. This is your right as His child. And HE WILL ALWAYS KEEP HIS WORD!

Dave-W · Jan 11, 2018

Mskriskris said:
Lol what a jerk.
He's being childish, while you're trying to be an adult.

Wow. That is really being harsh when you (and the rest of us here) know exactly ZERO about this guy. Even the OP does not know that much about him.

You perhaps would have called me a jerk as well. In high school and college I barely spoke to any females at all. Even the ones I had huge crushes on. (and I found out decades later that some of them had crushes on me as well)

salt-n-light · Jan 11, 2018

I would agree with you if this guy was also a high schooler/college guy. But the mere fact that you're using an example of how you were as a high schooler and college compare to someone beyond that age bracket, kinda proves my point.

I could be nice and say "immature", but for an adult, I think "jerk", gives a clearer message. I'm probably bias because I've been through that before, so sorry for relating too much.

I'll tone it down for the lads.

faroukfarouk · Jan 12, 2018

Mskriskris said:
I would agree with you if this guy was also a high schooler/college guy. But the mere fact that you're using an example of how you were as a high schooler and college compare to someone beyond that age bracket, kinda proves my point.

I could be nice and say "immature", but for an adult, I think "jerk", gives a clearer message. I'm probably bias because I've been through that before, so sorry for relating too much.

I'll tone it down for the lads.

I think Amos 3.3 is pivotal: "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"

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