The Christian life can be reduced to a contest between two things: Self and God. By "Self" I mean that part of you that is self-centered, that is prideful, and occupied with gratifying fleshly impulses. It is that part of you that wants to sit in God's seat in your life, that wants to get the glory rather than God, and that is obsessed with being liked, and accepted, and understood. Self is the ultimate source of all of our sin; it is the root of all the evil that we do. Because this is so, Self and God cannot co-exist. We either live under God's control or the control of Self. We cannot do both. Self is so incorrigibly bent toward evil, however, it is so irremediably against God, that God had to put it to death on the Cross of Christ (Ro. 6:1-18; 8:6, 7), render it powerless there, that we might be new creatures in Christ, free to walk in newness of life with him (2 Cor. 5:17).
Why am I telling you all this? Because you are under the control of Self. This is always made evident by things like low self-esteem, and self-loathing, and fear, doubt, depression, anxiety, a sensitivity to criticism, and a temperament quick to take offense and hurt. None of these things are of God. His Spirit imparts to us love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, faith, etc. (Ga. 5:22, 23) He leads us into a life of self-sacrifice, of death to Self, (Matt. 16:24, 25) not of Self-esteem. The only way to be free from the effects of Self is to die to it. That is, to enter into the truth of your crucifixion with Christ on the cross that has rendered Self powerless in your life (Ro. 6:6).
To be truly free of anxiety, one must be free of its source which is Self. God has already freed you from it; it remains for you to begin, by faith, to count on it being true (Ro. 6:11) and to live in the truth of your death to Self by your co-crucifixion with Christ. As you do, you will find anxiety, and depression, and the power of sinful, fleshly impulses dissolved. Your friends and counseling cannot replace what it is God has done for you in this regard through and in Christ.
Your value has nothing to do with what others may or may not do to, or with, you. You are valuable because God made you and made you in His image. No one can take that value from you. It is Self that attaches importance to being accepted and loved by others, that prompts you to connect your value to your standing in the eyes of others. The only One in whose eyes you ought to desire a good standing is God.
See above.
God bless you, too.
