I am currently in a marriage where my husband wants a divorce. I am being told have faith and that he will return. leave it to God. I am newly returning to Christ and I have the faith but I also know that is waivers ever so often because I am scared of loosing him.. I still love him like none of the has happened and day after day it just seems to get worse and worse.. I know first comes the storm then things will clear up and that I should have faith that My God can turn this around but I really needed support and the opinions of others at a time like this.. any input can help and I thank you all on advance..!! has anyone else had this happen..?
Can things Truly get better with faith..
- Thread starter Niecey85
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faroukfarouk
Fading curmudgeon
Remember God's promises to the believer, such as in Romans 8; and remember also that God looks to each of us to be faithful to our word (whatever divorce lawyers might tell you).
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Another Lazarus
Old Newbie
Welcome !!!
Just give up your heart to God, in good or in bad times.
Just give up your heart to God, in good or in bad times.
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I thank you!! I am trying my best to hold strong and have faith..!things happen here and there that make me question and feel like I should give up but I know that isn't an option because I believe in the covenant that I have made even if he doesn't anymore..Remember God's promises to the believer, such as in Romans 8; and remember also that God looks to each of us to be faithful to our word (whatever divorce lawyers might tell you).
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- Oct 13, 2009
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They always do, every single time. Our God is an amazing God. God bless you child
.
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Thank you for the welcome..!
I really need to do exactly that give up my heart.. the flesh is stepping in and hindering it at times.. I am scared I dont know how to let go and let God..!
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thank you thank you thank you I really needed this and the encouragement is just amazing..!They always do, every single time. Our God is an amazing God. God bless you child
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tdidymas
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The Bible says that you don't know if you will save your husband (1 Cor. 7:16). It also says to let the unbeliever leave (1 Cor. 7:15). Sometimes the more you try to save the relationship, the worse the other party reacts to it. If a person doesn't want help, you cannot help them. You cannot change him, you can only change yourself. But this is the worst-case scenario.
First thing, to pray and ask for God's guidance.
Then have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband. But you cannot get angry or tell him what is wrong with him. You must first confess your faults to him and ask him to forgive you. But you need to know the real reason he is filing for divorce. Is it because he is frustrated with you? or because he has a woman on the side? Does he profess Christ, or deny Him? If he is not a Christian, and that's the real reason for divorce, then he might be doing you a favor. If, say, he is an atheist or an idolator, he might be very hostile to Christ in his heart. But this is a worst-case scenario.
Find out if he is open to counseling, and find a good Christian counselor. Even a secular psychologist is better than nothing. You should forgive him of his faults. The only thing you are not required to forgive (to save the marriage) is unrepentant adultery or sexual immorality. If he goes through with the divorce, I think you should not resist it (refusing to sign the papers). I think that would just make things worse. You should attend a recovery program like Divorce Care (www.divorcecare.org), especially if the divorce gets finalized.
The only way that hope is completely lost is if he divorces you and marries another. Until then, you should wait on the Lord to see if He will supernaturally resolve the problem and restore your marriage. God can do powerful works in seemingly ordinary circumstances, but He doesn't always work that way.
In the meantime, you should work on yourself. Find out what your hurts, hangups, and habits are that hinder your relationships. Perhaps you have addictions that you don't know about, or are unsure of. Join a recovery program like Celebrate Recovery (www.celebraterecovery.com). You need to talk things out with people having the same kind of issues, because that helps you to overcome your relational problems.
Believe that God will change you for the better, and through the witness of your faith expressed, your husband might change his mind. 1 Pet. 3:1-6:
"Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear."
But if not, at least you tried, and made improvements to yourself in the process.
TD
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Lord Jesus Christ has worked miracles in my marriage recently. Some people here on CF prayed for my husband and I and I have been praying for change for such a long time, now it is really happening! Keep the faith. Trust in Jesus that everything will work out to the best possible outcome, even if it is not the outcome you had in mind. I promise you that nothing is impossible in Lord Jesus Christ! My husband is still a non-believer but the changes in him are so amazing that I am sure it is only a question of time until he gives his heart to Jesus.
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christianforumsuser
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How are your priorities? Who do you love the most? Are you loved? Are you rich? Are you content? Are you saying whatever you think I want to hear or what will get you what you want or telling me the truth? Do you understand the truth? Does your husband? Who is he?
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Dave G.
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The important thing here is your faith in Jesus Christ. With your faith solid in Him and the marriage works out then wonderful. If it doesn't work out you have that person of Jesus Christ with you. It makes a huge difference to know that you are never spiritually alone no matter what goes on around you. With Jesus as your anchor in life then all things work out to your good, even if they don't look the part initially.... Find your peace and comfort in Jesus, mankind will always find a way to let you down but He will never leave you nor forsake you.
As to your question about faith. Yes faith can really help but understand too that your husband has free will. But we can pray together and we should all pray together. I'm praying in the name of Jesus right now, Lord bring a spirit of understanding to this marriage, open the eyes of this husband that he might see , open both their ears that they might hear. Also bring in a spirit of discernment and Lord, let each person see the other through your eyes rather than their own eyes that little positive things are starting to be revealed to each other as only you can do. Amen
As to your question about faith. Yes faith can really help but understand too that your husband has free will. But we can pray together and we should all pray together. I'm praying in the name of Jesus right now, Lord bring a spirit of understanding to this marriage, open the eyes of this husband that he might see , open both their ears that they might hear. Also bring in a spirit of discernment and Lord, let each person see the other through your eyes rather than their own eyes that little positive things are starting to be revealed to each other as only you can do. Amen
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christianforumsuser
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There can be subtle differences in context and implication when different people move and talk.
One will respond and speak nicer and the other perhaps more bitter, but who is more carnal or spiritual...and are their words true.
Two people can exercise or work...people can eat the same food and speak the same words...
There can be huge differences...
One will respond and speak nicer and the other perhaps more bitter, but who is more carnal or spiritual...and are their words true.
Two people can exercise or work...people can eat the same food and speak the same words...
There can be huge differences...
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christianforumsuser
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Check with Scripture. Even if what I'm saying doesn't agree with your thoughts or what people around you think. If Scripture clearly says something while people refuse to hear it then Scripture is witness to its truth.
Who would sell their birthright for a stew? Do you have idolatry?
Who would sell their birthright for a stew? Do you have idolatry?
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I thank you so much this was quite helpful and informative. He hasn't filed yet but says he wants to and is currently dating some one else.. He is a believer in Christ and has followed his word up until recently when all this started I know it has come down to him wanting to live in the flesh.. but he wants to have his cake and eat it to in terms of live in the flesh but still follow Gods ways but the only ones that he wants..! since this has began I have started searching an bettering myself as best I can along with asking God for guidance..! I know I have my things I need to work on though they aren't cause for all this I'm working on them now so that "when" things change and God humbles him he will see I have changed and grown spirituallyThe Bible says that you don't know if you will save your husband (1 Cor. 7:16). It also says to let the unbeliever leave (1 Cor. 7:15). Sometimes the more you try to save the relationship, the worse the other party reacts to it. If a person doesn't want help, you cannot help them. You cannot change him, you can only change yourself. But this is the worst-case scenario.
First thing, to pray and ask for God's guidance.
Then have a heart-to-heart talk with your husband. But you cannot get angry or tell him what is wrong with him. You must first confess your faults to him and ask him to forgive you. But you need to know the real reason he is filing for divorce. Is it because he is frustrated with you? or because he has a woman on the side? Does he profess Christ, or deny Him? If he is not a Christian, and that's the real reason for divorce, then he might be doing you a favor. If, say, he is an atheist or an idolator, he might be very hostile to Christ in his heart. But this is a worst-case scenario.
Find out if he is open to counseling, and find a good Christian counselor. Even a secular psychologist is better than nothing. You should forgive him of his faults. The only thing you are not required to forgive (to save the marriage) is unrepentant adultery or sexual immorality. If he goes through with the divorce, I think you should not resist it (refusing to sign the papers). I think that would just make things worse. You should attend a recovery program like Divorce Care (www.divorcecare.org), especially if the divorce gets finalized.
The only way that hope is completely lost is if he divorces you and marries another. Until then, you should wait on the Lord to see if He will supernaturally resolve the problem and restore your marriage. God can do powerful works in seemingly ordinary circumstances, but He doesn't always work that way.
In the meantime, you should work on yourself. Find out what your hurts, hangups, and habits are that hinder your relationships. Perhaps you have addictions that you don't know about, or are unsure of. Join a recovery program like Celebrate Recovery (www.celebraterecovery.com). You need to talk things out with people having the same kind of issues, because that helps you to overcome your relational problems.
Believe that God will change you for the better, and through the witness of your faith expressed, your husband might change his mind. 1 Pet. 3:1-6:
"Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear."
But if not, at least you tried, and made improvements to yourself in the process.
TD
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wow im so happy for you that things are working out in your favor..!! I pray for the same in my own.. I will continue to keep the faith and let God work his wonders..!!
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thought heh doesn't think my priories are aligning with his anymore they are.. so they are in order for the most part.. I love him more than myself But God it the head of my life.! I am loved my God and but not by my husband that way I love him at the moment..! no we aren't rich. I am / was happy things could have been better but that would have taken him talking to me to do that..! honestly I try my best o always tell the truth I just like to because lying just means things I need to remember and I dont have time for all that..! I understand the truth but feel as though I dont so I know guidance is needed.. and at this point I dont know what he knows.. and by who is he you mean my husband ..?
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christianforumsuser
Well-Known Member
Prioritize the full gospel and be spiritually minded
Else everyone will be grabbing for what they see and saying their own thoughts apart from Scripture. It's carnal even if they profess godliness or their sins aren't revealed yet.
If you want marriage, go for it. If you want spiritual marriage, don't you remember what God did after Adam and Eve hid and put leaves on...or what Moses's brother did.
If people think they're so good, why do they keep disobeying and passing blame
It's unfortunate how many people are carnally minded but point at how many deeds they do openly and how they think they don't sin much. Thinking oneself to be better than another sinner might impress worldly people. It's not that I don't want people to have blessings. I can't understand why people get something shiny and won't let go of their ideas in place of what the Word really says.
Else everyone will be grabbing for what they see and saying their own thoughts apart from Scripture. It's carnal even if they profess godliness or their sins aren't revealed yet.
If you want marriage, go for it. If you want spiritual marriage, don't you remember what God did after Adam and Eve hid and put leaves on...or what Moses's brother did.
If people think they're so good, why do they keep disobeying and passing blame
It's unfortunate how many people are carnally minded but point at how many deeds they do openly and how they think they don't sin much. Thinking oneself to be better than another sinner might impress worldly people. It's not that I don't want people to have blessings. I can't understand why people get something shiny and won't let go of their ideas in place of what the Word really says.
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- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums
I thank you sooo much this really touched me and meant a lot.. thank you for the prayer..! I know I am spiritually never along and that I have to trust that god will either turn this around for me or that he will show me my path.
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