Please pray for me to get through this...

WilliamBo

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I am trying to follow Christ but sometimes I feel like the most lost person in the entire universe... crazy confusion, not understanding life or who I am. I'm not living in my home town and I feel like a complete alien here... and on top of that, in order to follow Christ you have to be separate from the world, so trying to be separate from the world in Christ in a foreign town with a different culture and stuff is just causing lots of confusion. I keep isolating from society, I think it is an attempt to ''protect'' myself from fears I have because of childhood trauma on top of my own sin and past evil. I've been praying and seeking the Lord for several years now trying to heal and get delivered but I'm still not there yet... life is short and I don't know how much longer it's going to take or what else I can do, I've been pursuing Christ for almost 6 years now... I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

I had a dream about a month ago that I was trying to enter into a drug-rehabilitation program but my car was full of all kinds of trash and the counselor in the program looked in my program and said I wasn't allowed to have that stuff in the program... I feel like the trash is a symbol of darkness that I am holding onto that is not allowed in Gods kingdom and I don't know what else I can do to get rid of the trash. My family are all athiests and do not support me pursuing God and I don't have a church or any real-life fellowship... like I said im in a foreign town and really just feel isolated
 

Citizen of the Kingdom

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For everyone who tries to walk with God it's a lonely process. Fellowshipping with others is crucial too, and you probably have more friends here than you know of. Jesus had His few that He was very close to, then an outer circle of disciples, then another larger circle of followers, but His walk with the Father was very much alone. I think we need to learn from the Master in this. Prayers for finding contentment whether you have much or little. He knows our needs better than we do. :prayer:
 
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Frank Jennings

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You must if you have not, yield yourself totally to Him. There's no one that cares for you like Jesus. I know about darkness having lived in the dark for 33 years before Jesus came for me. Members of my family had familiar spirits and other dark things. As a child these things attacked me and I had no one to pray for me. I was afraid all the time. I don't want to talk of me but want you to know I understand.

If you have been born again then please seek Jesus to baptize you in His Holy Spirit. This will give you God's power and anointing to defeat these dark things that torment you. Jesus saved me and baptized me in His Holy Spirit outside of church walls. Just ask Him to fill you with His Holy Spirit. He promises to give to everyone that asks. That's you and me.

Ezekiel 34:11-12 (NKJV)
11 'For thus says the Lord God: "Indeed I Myself will search for My sheep and seek them out.
12 As a shepherd seeks out his flock on the day he is among his scattered sheep, so will I seek out My sheep and deliver them from all the places where they were scattered on a cloudy and dark day.

Do not despair friend there is hope for you! Great hope. Jesus came to seek and to save that which was lost. That's you and me. I suggest that you fast and pray. Once you have received the fullness, the baptism in the Holy Spirit and have received the gift of tongues you can pray in the spirit, Jude vs 20, and build up your spirit man and pull down spiritual strongholds and principalities that are fighting you.

No matter where you are you cannot leave Jesus behind. You must also understand that spiritual battles are part of the burden of being a Christian. We have an enemy that hates us. For you and for me consider;

1 Peter 4:12 (NKJV) Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you;

I've been a Christian for 40 years now and have seen Jesus work in me to renew things and give me His strength to overcome. I pray He deliver, help, heal and strengthen you. That you enter into a new day of hope in the joy of the Lord. Amen
 
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Emli

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I had a dream about a month ago that I was trying to enter into a drug-rehabilitation program but my car was full of all kinds of trash and the counselor in the program looked in my program and said I wasn't allowed to have that stuff in the program... I feel like the trash is a symbol of darkness that I am holding onto that is not allowed in Gods kingdom and I don't know what else I can do to get rid of the trash.
That wasn't the dream though. :) The counselor could only see the concealer you had in there, and not all the trash, remember? And that's what you were not allowed to have in the program. That's what you need to get rid off (pride and shame), and then let the counselor (God, and possibly other people) see all that trash so He can throw it all out.

Just keep holding on to God, and He will clean you up. :)
 
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paul1149

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William, I will be praying for you, for clarity, protection, comfort and breakthrough. Keep holding onto Him, and wait in faith for His salvation. God bless you.
 
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Greg Merrill

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I am trying to follow Christ but sometimes I feel like the most lost person in the entire universe... crazy confusion, not understanding life or who I am. I'm not living in my home town and I feel like a complete alien here... and on top of that, in order to follow Christ you have to be separate from the world, so trying to be separate from the world in Christ in a foreign town with a different culture and stuff is just causing lots of confusion. I keep isolating from society, I think it is an attempt to ''protect'' myself from fears I have because of childhood trauma on top of my own sin and past evil. I've been praying and seeking the Lord for several years now trying to heal and get delivered but I'm still not there yet... life is short and I don't know how much longer it's going to take or what else I can do, I've been pursuing Christ for almost 6 years now... I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

I had a dream about a month ago that I was trying to enter into a drug-rehabilitation program but my car was full of all kinds of trash and the counselor in the program looked in my program and said I wasn't allowed to have that stuff in the program... I feel like the trash is a symbol of darkness that I am holding onto that is not allowed in Gods kingdom and I don't know what else I can do to get rid of the trash. My family are all athiests and do not support me pursuing God and I don't have a church or any real-life fellowship... like I said im in a foreign town and really just feel isolated
Father, I pray that WilliamBo can imagine himself moving into that place of residence spoken of in Psalms 91:1; "the secret place" of the Most High, and dwell under the shadow (protection and fellowship) of the Almighty. May he come to think of that as "his home...town". Then he will ALWAYS be at home, home sweet home, always sensing the presence of the Head of the family, his Heavenly Father. Never alone to feel lonely; never feeling isolated in a strange land because of be separated unto You, but at peace wherever he might find himself. Yhea, though we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil, for You are there preparing us a table in the presence of our enemies, providing for us, anointing us, making us comfortable to matter where in the world we are. Psalms 23:4,5. Philippians 4:6-7. May Your peace be upon Him, as he learns to rest in You. Amen.
 
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GTW27

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I am trying to follow Christ but sometimes I feel like the most lost person in the entire universe... crazy confusion, not understanding life or who I am. I'm not living in my home town and I feel like a complete alien here... and on top of that, in order to follow Christ you have to be separate from the world, so trying to be separate from the world in Christ in a foreign town with a different culture and stuff is just causing lots of confusion. I keep isolating from society, I think it is an attempt to ''protect'' myself from fears I have because of childhood trauma on top of my own sin and past evil. I've been praying and seeking the Lord for several years now trying to heal and get delivered but I'm still not there yet... life is short and I don't know how much longer it's going to take or what else I can do, I've been pursuing Christ for almost 6 years now... I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

I had a dream about a month ago that I was trying to enter into a drug-rehabilitation program but my car was full of all kinds of trash and the counselor in the program looked in my program and said I wasn't allowed to have that stuff in the program... I feel like the trash is a symbol of darkness that I am holding onto that is not allowed in Gods kingdom and I don't know what else I can do to get rid of the trash. My family are all athiests and do not support me pursuing God and I don't have a church or any real-life fellowship... like I said im in a foreign town and really just feel isolated

There once was a man who went through a very intense training. All would be provided in the training so that the only thing required of him was that he take out the trash. That way, his full attention would be on his training. This he did whenever trash was found in his house. This man has long since finished his training and to this day he still takes out the trash, so his house remains clean. He takes all his sin, repents of it, and places it under the blood of Jesus that He shed upon The Cross. Amazing what can come by way of dreams.
 
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Little Lantern

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Father, I pray that You will show @WilliamBo how to lean back into Your great love for him and receive life and peace from You.
Jesus said, "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and my load is light." (Matthew 11: 28-30 NASV)
 
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TheSeekerOfTruth

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Yahweh knows your struggles, he knows every need and knows what to do if you trust him to do something out of the ordinary. God will never leave you nor forsake you friend. He's always there for you because he cares for you and he definitely wants you to have companions. Don't get discouraged, stay patient and be strong in the Lord. Lord I pray for this person to have a peace of mind and to lean not on his or her own understanding.
 
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