It's a southern Baptist church and I haven't been since moving out. Hence my apprehension to going to the church about my husband. It is a complicated situation as they consider my sister in law a lost sheep so I know be moving in with her and her husband will be twisted into something unflattering, from what I understand there are already murmurs of a msnage a trois situation between my sister in law, her husband and myself (absolutely nothing of the sort is occurring ). My sister in law use to attend that church and her husband attended briefly when they first got married. The very first time the church body approached my sister in law and her husband about their, at the time alleged and now confirmed activities, the husband simply issued a screw you to the pastor and they started not going any more.
We pretty much live check to check. Before this occurred we were being subsidized by his parents. Like we lived in a house that they paid the note on and when we were short for the month they would give us cash. So I am assuming that he his some of the cash mommie and daddy gave him. I guess right now he is having his bills paid by his parents.
It is their house. I already spoke to the attorney who is friends with my sister in law's husband and he said the only thing I can hope for is child support and maybe, maybe the title to my vehicle which I owe more than is worth. The joint account never has more than a couple hundred dollars in it. I feel really ashamed but my last car note was paid by my sister in laws husband. Since my niece and my son ate in the same house now, that allows me to work a few extra hours so I know I can get the next payment and start paying back my sister in law's husband 50 dollars a week for 8 weeks.
Don't worry I am already out. I think your uncle frequented the same sites my husband does. On the sites my husband is on there are very graphic comics, role plays, photoshops of women being brutally executed, hung, gutted, run through with sharpened poles. My husband actually contributes photoshops that he does on these sites.
I guess it is the price we pay four how secular the county is. The people who I stay with are largely secular so they are not horrified by the cannibal inappropriate content. It really bothers them that my husband had described fantasies about their daughter but that bothers them more on an incest level. They are very good to me in the regard that they allow me to stay with them but even they are of the opinion "he wrote stories about eating you? So what? Isn't Hansel and Gretel about people eating people? But if it really bothers you I guess you can stay here".
I don't know if my hosts claim Christianity or not. They seem very secular in that they don't talk about Christianity or Christ one way or another. They seem to have really no strong opinion on the religion in general. I know they don't go to church and we never talk about religion period. They seem to despise civil authority as such my sister in law's husband is constantly maligning the government, the police, the military and pretty much anything associated with social order but that's about it. Both of them also have a very pronounced "to each's own" outlook on life so they have no strong opinion one way or another concerning the nature of the inappropriate content my husband enjoys. Like I said it disturbed them that my husband wrote about their daughter but they don't seem to really care that he has a cannabalism fetish. So they don't as much condemn my husband but more harass and embarrass him because they seem to think it's fun.Yes, I agree that is not good. As you pointed out, this is still your best choice at this point.
But I thought they were Christians? Do they say they aren't Christians? Also, aren't the other Christians around even worse? For instance, that church that might tell you to go back to your husband? Or his parents who defended the cannibal inappropriate content? They are Christians, right? The husband himself- he's Christian, right?
But in any case, looking at "people we know" isn't a good way to see correlations - that takes much larger data sets. For instance, everyone I know calls sugary drinks "pop" - yet I would be quite wrong if I thought that everyone in the US called them "pop".
I've heard that, and discussed it with friends of mine who are secular, and they pointed out that it doesn't look like it reflects reality. They are great people, and they were very nice about it.
For instance, when it comes to inappropriate content, it seems that Christians use more inappropriate content than secular people. Here's an article in Christianity today about it. America's Bible Belt states indulge in more online inappropriate content than other less religious states | Christian News on Christian Today
The idea that less religion leads to violence seems to be wrong too. For instance, the US has become a lot more secular in the last 40 years, and overall violent crime has been dropping that whole time, as have murders, etc.
And the same thing shows up when we look at other countries - less Christian countries are not at all more violent than countries with a lot of Christians - in fact, it often seems to go the other way. http://moses.creighton.edu/JRS/2005/2005-11.pdf
Because corellation is not causation, the real story is surely more complicated. The bottom line to me at least is that we should not suggest that Christians are less violent, less inappropriate content using, that the country is better off being more Christian, or such, because the data simply doesn't support that claim, and it ends up making us look bad.
This is all kinda a tangent from the main point of the thread, which is to help you through this tough time and help you make good choices. I'm glad every time I open this thread to know that you are in a safer, healthier situation for you and your son.
Blessings- Papias
I guess in introspection I am wondering how it is so much worse. Part of this has to do with making my self more comfortable with my son spending time with his father. I am under no illusions here, I know the is no legal way for me to completely prevent my son from seeing his father. My husband had never hit me or my son and I would be hard pressed to find a court that would agree that he is a danger just because he likes inappropriate content (I know the subject of the inappropriate content us disturbing but a good attorney would just argue that judging some one on their inappropriate contentography preference is not constitutional or something like that).
That's what I hope. But like they say, pray for the best but plan for the worst. My husband has contacted me and is threatening legal action for keeping his son away from him. He is threatening to go to authorities and tell them that I have my son staying in a home with a man who has been convicted of assault in the past (my sister in law's husband was charged and convicted of assult 5 years ago stemming from a fight he got into with my husband ). My sister in law's husband has urged me to call his bluff and on the off chance he does go to the police to share of his stories on Facebook and m make sure to tag all the various women he had written about.
