Over-controlling Dad

Cutebunny said:

Hi all,

How do you deal with an over-controlling dad? He notices every tiny detail that is not right, and I seldom hear his encouragement. I easily get bad mood when it does happen and I am affected the whole day. How do you deal with him, especially in the morning when he is so busy, he gets angry easily.

Thanks

Click to expand...

A. You pray about the situation continually to God, asking Him to give you His wisdom.

B. You find a way to openly communicate to him this effect his behavior is having on you, clearly, but without expressing any resentment in your voice. Try and go to him with it at a time when your heart is healed and you only want to explain to him how hard it is for you to deal with, but do not come off as condemning. Also only do this when you are fully prepared for him to offend you again, at which time just be ready to leave the room if necessary to avoid saying something you shouldn't.

C. Avoid him as much as possible during the mornings, and any other time you know he might be angry.

Cutebunny said:

Hi all,

How do you deal with an over-controlling dad? He notices every tiny detail that is not right, and I seldom hear his encouragement. I easily get bad mood when it does happen and I am affected the whole day. How do you deal with him, especially in the morning when he is so busy, he gets angry easily.

Thanks

Click to expand...

It's hard to answer your question without knowing your living arrangement. If you have a job, one option would be to find your own place to live. Is your dad a heavy drinker? People who drink a lot can be angry a lot of the time.

I'm sorry that your dad treats you that way

My dad treated me the exact same way

Here are some thoughts that I hope would be of use to you

Proverbs 13:20 He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm

Try to avoid your dad as much as possible, as he is a harmful influence on you

Try not to talk to him either, as anything you say could be used against you

Try to find friends in the church who can be supportive of you, and who you can talk to about problems you may have

Matthew 10:14 Whoever does not receive you, nor heed your words, as you go out of that house or that city, shake the dust off your feet

If we are living in places that don't welcome us, we should leave. In 1 Samuel, David fled from Saul when Saul started to persecute David. In Acts, the apostles fled from their persecutors

The best thing you could do for yourself would be to move out to your own place the moment you are able to afford your own place

Some may say that leaving your dad would not be honoring him, let me explain why that is not a reason to stay with your dad

Exodus 20:12 says honor your father and your mother

However,

Ephesians 6:1 says Children, obey your parents in the Lord

If our parents cause us harm, we are not obligated to stay with them, because it is not the Lord's will for us to be in harmful situations

Don't make the mistake that I made. I was enslaved by my parents up to the time I was eighteen, and went to school. In my thirties, I made a big mistake by living with my parents again, only to end up getting myself enslaved again