I think the Father didn't gave me to Jesus. I've lost my faith. I though I was called by God last year when I read some verses during a crisis, and then I bought a Bible started to read it. I started praying. Writing about Jesus.
But I think I wasn't called. I feel nothing. Only emptiness. I have nothing. No friends. No wife. No nothing.
Hi Guerrier, your desire to know God and to come to faith in Him is an excellent sign that something's going on in your life spiritually, and that God has had everything to do with it
Faith, BTW, is NOT a feeling (though emotions are often involved at times), it's a fact, and a choice on your part to trust and believe that God will save you from your sins and your sinful self, just like He promised us He would (by His gracious choice to do so on the basis of His Son's life, death and resurrection, IOW, on the basis of the things He did for us/in our stead).
BTW, He doesn't ask you to improve yourself before coming to faith, that happens afterwards (just like we don't ask the physically sick to get better before they come to the hospital). In fact, God is in the business of saving the ungodly/wicked who come to Him in faith knowing they need a Savior (not the self-righteous, who think they have no need of a Savior .. e.g.
Mark 2:17):
Romans 4
5 To the one who does not work, but believes in Him who justifies the wicked, his faith is credited as righteousness.
So come to Him now,
just the way you are, and let Him take care of the rest. Quite frankly, if we could make the necessary changes and improvements ourselves, Jesus would have never had to come here and die that horrible death on the Cross for us.
IOW, look to Jesus
Confess your sins to Him and ask Him to forgive you of them. Surrender the reins of you life to Him (giving Him control over your life) by asking Him to become your Lord and Savior, trusting that He always knows far better than you do what's best for you and your life. And ask to be filled with the Holy Spirit.
Oh, and find a church to be a member of immediately, where you can hear the word of God preached, partake of the sacraments (Lord's Supper/Baptism), worship God corporately, function as a member of the body of Christ, and have regular fellowship with other believers (you need us AND we need you
.. read
1 Corinthians 12).
I can promise you that you will not be lonely any longer if you do so. You'll be too busy and have too many friends in Christ for that
Praying for you!
In Christ,
David
p.s. - I could use another friend, so please PM me if you'd like to, whenever you'd like to!
Romans 10
9 If you confess with your mouth, Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.