How to encourage?

DeerGlow · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
Interesting, thank you for your insight!

You're welcome.

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

DeerGlow said:
Sometimes we need a little tough love (for lack of a better word) from others but some people go overboard with it. On the other side some people gloss over distressed people's problems and they end up feeling ignored on top of the original problem.

yeah, i guess "beating up" someone already hurting, bleeding, and wounded would be a bad, thing, eh?

What's the name of this thread, again?

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
I agree and as you said people can go overboard. There is a fine line between being too soft and being too hard. If you had to choose, which is better? Being too soft or being too hard?

How about encouragement?

In proverbs it is written that our words (encouragement) are just what is needed, cuz God, through His Spirit, PUT them there, so they are always "in season" if HE put them there.

Otherwise there it is, kicking someone when they're already down.

Amen?

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

Foxfyre said:
Personally I don't think it is our business to concern ourselves about what others do or don't do for the Lord. Our job is to love God and to allow Him to love others through us. Leading by example, but without boasting or self-righteous grand standing, is generally the best encouragement for others to do good.

I agree with you. I will explain if you wish.

(Hang in there Jeff, not necessarily dis-agreeing with you my brother)

DeerGlow · Jul 10, 2017

brinny said:
yeah, i guess "beating up" someone already hurting, bleeding, and wounded would be a bad, thing, eh?

What's the name of this thread, again?

Not beating up.... but I can't think of a good way to explain it. How to encourage.... maybe my church's last lesson would help. Empathise not sympathise. Don't be like, "I'm sorry" but really indifferent. Or say, "Go and be filled." But not give a person what they need to be better. "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep." I guess to encourage try to understand their mindset and feelings and assist them as you see their need.

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
Exactly! Too many times Christian "encouragement" becomes a condemnation party where the one needing encouraged is beat down for a variety of reasons.

Yeah, i've seen this LOTS.

Unbelievable, isn't it?

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

DeerGlow said:
Not beating up.... but I can't think of a good way to explain it. How to encourage.... maybe my church's last lesson would help. Empathise not sympathise. Don't be like, "I'm sorry" but really indifferent. Or say, "Go and be filled." But not give a person what they need to be better. "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep." I guess to encourage try to understand their mindset and feelings and assist them as you see their need.

Yeah, "beating up" is always a "bad" thing, isn't it?

And yes, that verse from James is spot on.

I agree with you that "fakeness" when it comes to feigning "empathy" is nauseating.

:sick:

yeshuaslavejeff · Jul 10, 2017

Colossians 2 "encouragement"

"This is what I have asked of God for you:

that you will be encouraged and knit together by strong ties of love,

and that you will have the rich experience of knowing Christ with real certainty and clear understanding.

For God's secret plan, now at last made known, is Christ Himself.

In Him lie hidden all the might, untapped treasures of wisdom and knowledge.
...
And now just as you trusted Christ to save you,
trust Him too for each day's problems;

live in vital union with Him.
... "

ByTheSpirit · Jul 10, 2017

I definitely think looking at the Greek that encourage could mean to build up. Sometimes building up involves a bit of tearing down, but tearing down is not the main purpose. And tearing down need not be a destructive thing. Rather just a simple dismantling of current standing.

I liken it to tearing down a house. You can take it apart piece by piece to possibly reuse good portions in the rebuild, or you can just demolish it and start all over from scratch. I think biblically speaking, encouragement would be a gentle, peaceful tear down where we don't just destroy the person but gently correct them and are able to build them up again.

Am I off on this? I am sure someone here will disagree with me

DeerGlow · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
I definitely think looking at the Greek that encourage could mean to build up. Sometimes building up involves a bit of tearing down, but tearing down is not the main purpose. And tearing down need not be a destructive thing. Rather just a simple dismantling of current standing.

I liken it to tearing down a house. You can take it apart piece by piece to possibly reuse good portions in the rebuild, or you can just demolish it and start all over from scratch. I think biblically speaking, encouragement would be a gentle, peaceful tear down where we don't just destroy the person but gently correct them and are able to build them up again.

Am I off on this? I am sure someone here will disagree with me

@brinny I think this explains what I meant, sometimes to help someone you have to help them break down what is not helping or even what is detrimental to them.

DeerGlow · Jul 10, 2017

Someone, can't find the post now, suggested making a positive blog instead of using the negative one all the time to express negative things. He/she said it probably wasn't good for me spiritually to only dwell on negatives and offered a solution. That was good encouragement.

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

DeerGlow said:
Someone, can't find the post now, suggested making a positive blog instead of using the negative one all the time to express negative things. He/she said it probably wasn't good for me spiritually to only dwell on negatives and offered a solution. That was good encouragement.

I agree. It reminds me of "counting our blessings", which is powerful against negativity (which is so addicting) and counteracts dark forebodings. Same with praise and worship. I've heard that all the darkness and whatever abides in that darkness flees when there is praise because God is right there in the midst of that praise.

brinny · Jul 10, 2017

DeerGlow said:
@brinny I think this explains what I meant, sometimes to help someone you have to help them break down what is not helping or even what is detrimental to them.

Only God can do that, in His timing.

I've seen many many being kicked when they're down.

Encouragement is never ever kicking someone when they're down and or putting salt in wounds.

Foxfyre · Jul 10, 2017

yeshuaslavejeff said:
That's true for most people on earth,
but not for the people called and chosen and set apart by God through faith in Jesus Name.
God gives wonderful and specific instructions, yet even without TORAH,
God writes on His People's Hearts His Instructions for life, and guides us / His Sheep Hear His Voice....
changing the lives of others very dramatically - bringing healing and good news where there was just pain and sorrow and grief before.

We have our personal duty and responsibility yes, and God will nudge or lead us on whatever path He knows we should be on. But we cannot know what somebody else is called to do and that maybe be something entirely different than what we ourselves are called on to do.

lastofall · Jul 10, 2017

by verse 25.."Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching."

Tangible · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
What I mean in a practical sense is if you know someone in your church or sphere of influence should be doing something good for the Lord but isn't, how can you encourage that person to do what they ought without condemning them?

Quick note: We can't do anything for the Lord. God is not pleased by any work we might do. Even the most self-sacrificing, genuine, sincere good work we can do is still tainted by our innate sinfulness, our sinful attitudes, desires and motivations. God is only pleased by what Jesus Christ has done. God doesn't need our good works. He is perfectly capable of accomplishing his good and perfect will independently of anything we could ever do.

However, our neighbor does need our good works, and quite often God works through us, even through our sinful flesh, to love and provide for the needs of our neighbors.

ByTheSpirit · Jul 10, 2017

Tangible said:
Quick note: We can't do anything for the Lord. God is not pleased by any work we might do. Even the most self-sacrificing, genuine, sincere good work we can do is still tainted by our innate sinfulness, our sinful attitudes, desires and motivations. God is only pleased by what Jesus Christ has done. God doesn't need our good works. He is perfectly capable of accomplishing his good and perfect will independently of anything we could ever do.

However, our neighbor does need our good works, and quite often God works through us, even through our sinful flesh, to love and provide for the needs of our neighbors.

This is what I meant. I agree that of ourselves we can do nothing for God, but we are the channels by which God will bring good to other side more often than not.

Kit Sigmon · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works,”
‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:24‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Another very simple question:

How do we stir up other believers to good works and love?

What I mean in a practical sense is if you know someone in your church or sphere of influence should be doing something good for the Lord but isn't, how can you encourage that person to do what they ought without condemning them?

*again not meant as a trap but a genuine discussion

"How do we stir up other believers to good works and love?"
It'd be good for all of us to be in and practice real koinonia...Acts 2:42,
1 John 1:1-4, Philippians 1: 3-7, Philippians 2:1-18, Romans 15:26,
1 Corinthians 10:16, 2 Corinthians 9:13 etc.

Koinonia... Koinonia - New Testament Greek Lexicon - New American Standard

yeshuaslavejeff · Jul 10, 2017

Foxfyre said:
We have our personal duty and responsibility yes, and God will nudge or lead us on whatever path He knows we should be on. But we cannot know what somebody else is called to do and that maybe be something entirely different than what we ourselves are called on to do.

If you would like to know what others in Christ's body/ ekklesia born again of the Father's Will/ are called to do , and how they are called to live,
read ACTS, EPHESIANS, COLOSSIANS, and PHILIPPIANS.

There it is written very clearly.

GirdYourLoins · Jul 10, 2017

ByTheSpirit said:
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works,”
‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:24‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Another very simple question:

How do we stir up other believers to good works and love?

What I mean in a practical sense is if you know someone in your church or sphere of influence should be doing something good for the Lord but isn't, how can you encourage that person to do what they ought without condemning them?

*again not meant as a trap but a genuine discussion

Invite them to join you in the ministry you are doing.

How to encourage?

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