Celibacy and why?

bhsmte · Jul 8, 2017

brinny said:
LOL! I'm soooo confused.....i thought i asked the other member

And I asked you why it would be. This is an open forum.

brinny · Jul 8, 2017

bhsmte said:
And I asked you why it would be. This is an open forum.

uh-huh.

Yes it is.

ImAllLikeOkWaitWat · Jul 8, 2017

brinny said:
LOL! What in da world does that mean?

Some seem to think that the word "celibacy" is offensive.

lol i don't know whats going on right now, I'm just winging it

Hmm celibacy doesn't seem offensive to me, not sure what others think though.

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

Wayholka said:
Fortunately, God promises something really nice in Heaven for those who miss out on marriage and sexual relationships. Isaiah 56:3-5. I'd much rather have a really awesome eternal reward in Heaven instead of a temporary relationship with a women who offers me conditional love for as long as it is convenient for her.

Wayholka said:
Positive: It has allowed me to focus my time, money, and energy to serving God to earn reward in Heaven. I could give you a list of good deeds I have done since 2011 and most of them would not have been possible if I still had a girlfriend to entertain.

Negative: It does get lonely and sexually frustrating at times. Being an Aspie is one of the loneliest disabilities you can have.

Thank you for sharing your heart here and I totally get what you are saying, because my heart and mind are 50/50 on the issue and I am seeking MY personal feelings and spirituality over it, yes I am married, but I reckon "sometimes" God calls us to make changes OR things outside of our life changes that WE CANT CONTROL and it causes one to go this route. Still praying for you Wayholka thanks

brinny · Jul 8, 2017

Wayholka said:
I had bad experiences with women. The first girl I tried to have a relationship with rejected me and told me that no girl would ever want me because I had such an unattractive personality. After much self reflection, I actually agree. I had a girlfriend from 2009 to 2010 and it was rather toxic. She would constantly lie to me, hit me, slap me, punch me, make mean jokes at my expense, and was an all around drama queen. I've made many mistakes myself with these women and I still hate myself for it.

The final straw for me is the fact that people like Ted Bundy can easily have fan girls in spite of their mistakes and flaws but someone like me is just 'not romantic enough'. Comedian Bill Hicks made a quote about something like this and it really hit home for me. It made me decide that romance in a world like this just simply isn't worth it.

A mixture. I suffer from a disability that affects me physically, mentally, and socially. Women don't like that. They value strength in all those fields. How I was treated in life also affected my view of people in general.

Fortunately, God promises something really nice in Heaven for those who miss out on marriage and sexual relationships. Isaiah 56:3-5. I'd much rather have a really awesome eternal reward in Heaven instead of a temporary relationship with a women who offers me conditional love for as long as it is convenient for her.

As long as I suffer all these health problems, I really don't have much of a choice.

I honestly don't know if I can feel love the same way as a normal person can. I'm fine with just female friends, not relationships anymore.

I'm not getting married so this is not an issue.

Paul mentions that it is better to remain single than to get married because it allows you to focus on serving God and earning eternal reward instead of pleasing a spouse. Married people's reward is the love and affection on this world. A single person's reward is a monument and a name in Heaven. I'd say it's a fine choice of whether you want to be rewarded in this life or the next.

1 Corinthians 7

Positive: It has allowed me to focus my time, money, and energy to serving God to earn reward in Heaven. I could give you a list of good deeds I have done since 2011 and most of them would not have been possible if I still had a girlfriend to entertain.

Negative: It does get lonely and sexually frustrating at times. Being an Aspie is one of the loneliest disabilities you can have.

Paul says otherwise.

I agree about Paul.

Amen.

bhsmte · Jul 8, 2017

brinny said:
uh-huh.

Yes it is.

Thanks for acknowledging that reality.

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

ImAllLikeOkWaitWhat said:
lol i don't know whats going on right now, I'm just winging it

Hmm celibacy doesn't seem offensive to me, not sure what others think though.

as usual bud I GOTTA pray for you LOL

brinny · Jul 8, 2017

bhsmte said:
Thanks for acknowledging that reality.

Anytime.

ImAllLikeOkWaitWat · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
as usual bud I GOTTA pray for you LOL

I wish you would pray for me!

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

ImAllLikeOkWaitWhat said:
I wish you would pray for me!

HoleyHermit · Jul 8, 2017

Jesus: For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.

Paul: To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Don't see how anyone could find celibacy to be unbiblical.

Chesterton · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
1. What brought you to the point of celibacy?

Just made the decision based on my faith.

2. Is it a religious reason or due to life situations or personal convictions?

Mostly religious, situations and convictions make it amenable to me though.

3. When you choose celibacy is it for life or is it temporary?

For life, unless God has a big surprise in store for me.

4. How do you handle the intimate issues that you feel when they arise if any?

If you're asking what I think you might be asking, it was a little difficult in the beginning, got a lot easier over time. No need to "handle" anything anymore.

Is celibacy in the bible and if so could you share the scriptures?

Paul says somewhere it's a good idea to either be married, or abstain from fornication. I forget the chapter and verse offhand.

7. What has being celibate done for you in a positive way or negative way?

It's removed a big distraction in life. I don't devote much thought to certain unproductive things I once did, nor do I devote time and energy to pursuing those things, and it helps keeps me from impurity.

Ygrene Imref · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
Great response and I am following what you are saying, thank you. What does this mean to you?

I won't lie and say if an attractive person walks by me that I won't have a physical reponse. But, I also realized (especially when I was pubescent in high school and university) that the air conditioner coming on, and the draft that follows can also "produce a physical response in me."

So, I had to think k about what actually goes into pure phisiological response vs. our entertainment of it into some spiritual monstrosity based on a physical reaponse.

Should I have sex with an air conditioner, since it produces the same physic response as an attracive person does? NO.

So, then, why would I need to lust after a person just because it produces the same physical response? Eventually, training in resisting and understanding the basis of this led me to understand true asexuality as a weapon against temptation.

When I say I can go full asexual, I mean I can be like our Brother and (with extremely hard, patient work) treat physical stimulation (of any kind, really) as an attack, and then I use my psychological checkpoints to reverse engineer where, and especially why such a thing would occur. Incidentally, I discussed this thing with someone else on another thread.

I am a martial artist, and there is a technique that allows someone to produce virtual mental states of concerntration that would, ultimately, translate to the way one interacts with physical phenomena - including, but certainly not limited to fighting. It is called Mushin (No Shin). Christ taught me this before I knew about it, formally, when He was training me.

So, it is a all-encompassing training and battle to be "asexual" in the sense that I am only focused on entertaining physical stimuli through sexual attraction if the person is the other half of my soul.

Chesterton · Jul 8, 2017

High Fidelity said:
Interesting question

I have wondered this myself recently because a lot of the people I see claiming celibacy... it seems more of a coping mechanism to make it seem like they're in control of the absence of those aspects of life as opposed to an act of righteousness.

You've determined that just by seeing the word appear on your screen or what?

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

HoleyHermit said:
Jesus: For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.

Paul: To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

Don't see how anyone could find celibacy to be unbiblical.

Thank you for the response and I FIND NOTHING WRONG with this at all, period point blank I really dont, I am searching for answers and I thank you for giving me these 2 examples.

Btw, I find you very humorous (and agreeable) in your posts, I appreciate you bringing joy to CF and when down you have made me smile thank you :hoho:

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

Ygrene Imref said:
So, it is a all-encompassing training and battle to be "asexual" in the sense that I am only focused on entertaining physical stimuli through sexual attraction if the person is the other half of my soul.

I understand that well explained :oldthumbsup:

Solomons Porch · Jul 8, 2017

Example: what IF you are married, one partner wants to be celibate (for personal reasons) but the other not, now this is gonna be a huge problem for sure (or so I suspect) has anyone here had this issue within marriage? and if so how did you handle it and what was the outcome "if not too personal"? If it's too personal simply dont reply I am not expecting you to

tstor · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
1. What brought you to the point of celibacy?
I dislike women generally. I do not like speaking to them unless they are family. That is pretty much the main reason.

2. Is it a religious reason or due to life situations or personal convictions?
Both. I personally felt the desire to practice celibacy. It just so happens that this lifestyle is permissible according to Scriptures.

3. When you choose celibacy is it for life or is it temporary?
Most certainly for life. I have no intention of engaging in an intimate relationship with anyone.

4. How do you handle the intimate issues that you feel when they arise if any?
I ignore them. I see plenty of beautiful women that I would love to speak with, but I bite my tongue. I let opportunities pass.

5. IF married, does your partner do the same OR is celibacy NOT included in a marriage? Was there an agreement made?
I have no idea how celibacy would be practiced in marriage.

6. Is celibacy in the bible and if so could you share the scriptures?
1 Corinthians 7:6-9:

Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.

To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (ESV)

7. What has being celibate done for you in a positive way or negative way?
It has kept me out of trouble with women, which is good. It has also made me contemplate loneliness, which is not always fun.

Victory-N-Christ · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
Definition of celibacy

1: the state of not being married

2a : abstention from sexual intercourse

b : abstention by vow from marriage

This is Websters definition of celibacy. I have noticed a lot lately that persons profile status is one of celibacy. So I have a few questions:

1. What brought you to the point of celibacy?
2. Is it a religious reason or due to life situations or personal convictions?
3. When you choose celibacy is it for life or is it temporary?
4. How do you handle the intimate issues that you feel when they arise if any?
5. IF married, does your partner do the same OR is celibacy NOT included in a marriage? Was there an agreement made?
6. Is celibacy in the bible and if so could you share the scriptures?
7. What has being celibate done for you in a positive way or negative way?
8. If you believe being celibate is not Godly or scriptural pertaining to marriage can you share scripture and why?

Mods if I posted in the wrong forum please feel free to move to proper location thank you and God bless

Good question.

brinny · Jul 8, 2017

Solomons Porch said:
Example: what IF you are married, one partner wants to be celibate (for personal reasons) but the other not, now this is gonna be a huge problem for sure (or so I suspect) has anyone here had this issue within marriage? and if so how did you handle it and what was the outcome "if not too personal"? If it's too personal simply dont reply I am not expecting you to

The Bible SPEAKS on this very thing.

Although, in marriage, i'm not sure how this would be called "celibate" since it applies more to single people. "Abstaining" would be more applicable to those who are married.

Thus the confusion when i first saw this thread.

Celibacy and why?

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