My Life as a Christian since 1993.

I was re-introduced to Christ in 1993. I lived my life as a Believer since then, at least I tried my best. Now in 2015, I am wondering if my Christian life is going in the correct direction. I've been through alot of heartache since I've become a Christian. I've hurt many others after I've become a Christian. I have been reprimanded many times since I have become a Christian. I even feel as if God Himself is reprimanding me since I've become a Christian. Everyday I go through severe trials, for myself, because I am not good enough (cliche). I try everyday. I try all the time. I am wondering if I am on the correct path. Each night is almost a nightmare and each morning starts almost immediately with condemnation. Daily. There is some force outside of myself that I can't overcome. Every Day. All throughout the day. It's almost becoming my normal life. I wonder if this is a normal life a Christian is supposed to live. My health is deteriorating, my mind is deteriorating, my relationships are deteriorating. I get weaker and weaker everyday and the condemnation gets stronger and stronger because I am getting weaker and weaker. I ask Christ daily to help me. I ask His Father daily to help me, I ask the Holy Spirit daily to help me. All I seem to be receiving is "it's your shortcoming." That I'm too weak to accomplish normal everyday tasks that everyone else breezes through. I can't do anything correctly, it seems. It's becoming more and more difficult to remain a Christian.

Gentle Lamb said:

It's okay to give up! That was the best thing I ever did as a Christian, I said to God, I give up! I had reached the end of my rope and needed the help that only He could give me after I had given up. Through my admitting I had NO strength or goodness of my own or anything of my own, He came in and changed so much. Stop trying, just give up and give in to God and just keep giving up and seeking His will and His strength and He can turn the situation around for you. Also, all that condemnation and "it's your shortcoming" -- that is purely the put downs from the enemy who wants to see you hurting, broken, and sick. God wants to see you whole, thriving, and healed! That is His will for you. I pray that God will strengthen you as you seek Him. Seek His rest and lay your burdens at His feet! Matthew 11:28 - He promises His yoke is EASY and His burden is LIGHT and you are most certainly laboring under the burden you currently bear, so lay yours at His feet and take up His yoke. God bless you brother.

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thank you.

orangeness365 said:

i've failed at being a good Christian too, even though I tried. I too feel like everyday is a nightmare, although the condemnation usually begins at night. I don't want to give up on Christianity though precisely because I have failed at being a good person, I feel like Christianity is the only chance I have at going to a place like Heaven. Like has been mentioned above it's important to have God make you transform instead of yourself, although I'm not sure precisely how that happens. When it comes to the comdemnation, my brother says that after you ask for forgiveness once from God, then you are forgiven, and you just have to learn to let it go, because God already has.

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I pray and hope that your relationship with God becomes more understandable. I believe that God is not the One condemning but rather some 'sin' or some 'evil spirit'. Either way, I hope that everyone that is confused as to why 'God is allowing them to undergo the daily suffering' will understand and know rather than clinging on to the faith that seems to be diminishing.

david rodriguez said:

I pray and hope that your relationship with God becomes more understandable. I believe that God is not the One condemning but rather some 'sin' or some 'evil spirit'. Either way, I hope that everyone that is confused as to why 'God is allowing them to undergo the daily suffering' will understand and know rather than clinging on to the faith that seems to be diminishing.

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I do know that is much easier to walk in a path that you know about rather than on a path that you have to walk on by 'faith.' Especially when the path does not make too much logical sense and at the same time, you keep getting bit over and over on the path but not knowing why you are getting bit and how to prevent getting bit.