• The General Mental Health Forum is now a Read Only Forum. As we had two large areas making it difficult for many to find, we decided to combine the Mental Health & the Recovery sections of the forum into Mental Health & Recovery as a whole. Physical Health still remains as it's own area within the entire Recovery area.

    If you are having struggles, need support in a particular area that you aren't finding a specific recovery area forum, you may find the General Struggles forum a great place to post. Any any that is related to emotions, self-esteem, insomnia, anger, relationship dynamics due to mental health and recovery and other issues that don't fit better in another forum would be examples of topics that might go there.

    If you have spiritual issues related to a mental health and recovery issue, please use the Recovery Related Spiritual Advice forum. This forum is designed to be like Christian Advice, only for recovery type of issues. Recovery being like a family in many ways, allows us to support one another together. May you be blessed today and each day.

    Kristen.NewCreation and FreeinChrist

GloriousRuins

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Hello everyone! I was a frequent visitor to this thread about a year ago. I don't know why exactly I stopped visiting and checking in. But throughout the year, I can say my OCD has been up and down. Last year, I really struggled with thoughts about sexual desires. It really, really wore me down, but God brought me through it. He opened new doors in my life. Made some new friends, and really life became pretty good. That was until, the friends kind of went away, and I was left alone. My OCD came roaring back fiercer then it was before. I've been dealing with it on and off since March. But as of the last couple of weeks it's just become to much to bear. I was sexually abused when I was four. And I thought that I had overcome it. I was made new, and whole in Jesus. And washed clean in His name. But I'm finding that what happened to me when I was a kid is really starting to wear on me. I'm worried about being attracted to things I know I'm not attracted to. I'm worried feeling things I don't feel. And my biggest fear is that I'm gonna become the monster that hurt me when I was younger. This has honestly become my life. Sitting in my room alone, because I'm terrified of what might happen if I leave my room. This has really stressed me out. I've started to question everything about myself. I really just need to know if this does ever end. And some prayer would really, really help.
 

gracealone

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Hi Glorious,
It's such a relief isn't it to be free of the anxiety for a long period of time. I'm sorry to hear you are struggling again. Was there something specific that you were doing that you feel helped you to turn away from the obsessional thoughts? Maybe it was just you being really busy and distracted with friends and activities? Or maybe your stress level was down and so your anxiety levels were lower?
I do know that managing OCD - Pure O is a life long thing. It waxes and wanes according to our stress level, our physical health etc. Sounds like you are dealing with Pure O. Your theme is a common one for a lot of folk who struggle with Pure O.
Have you ever been on meds. for your OCD or have you learned how to work with ERP to manage the thoughts? These are the things that you may need to do in order to get on top of these obsessions when they try to rear their ugly heads again.
I have struggled on and off with some crippling OCD themes since I was in my early twenties. Learning about how to manage the thoughts via ERP has been enormously helpful to me. I have used meds. also. Right now I need very little in the way of meds. because my OCD is only a minor nuisance. But there were many years when I struggle tremendously. It can be excruciating. I didn't even know I had OCD back then. I just want to encourage you that you can and will feel better. You just need to learn how to manage the thoughts, ride out the anxiety and work toward getting your serotonin levels back up to a healthy level again.
If you want, feel free to PM me with any questions you may have. Praying for you. Mitzi



Hello everyone! I was a frequent visitor to this thread about a year ago. I don't know why exactly I stopped visiting and checking in. But throughout the year, I can say my OCD has been up and down. Last year, I really struggled with thoughts about sexual desires. It really, really wore me down, but God brought me through it. He opened new doors in my life. Made some new friends, and really life became pretty good. That was until, the friends kind of went away, and I was left alone. My OCD came roaring back fiercer then it was before. I've been dealing with it on and off since March. But as of the last couple of weeks it's just become to much to bear. I was sexually abused when I was four. And I thought that I had overcome it. I was made new, and whole in Jesus. And washed clean in His name. But I'm finding that what happened to me when I was a kid is really starting to wear on me. I'm worried about being attracted to things I know I'm not attracted to. I'm worried feeling things I don't feel. And my biggest fear is that I'm gonna become the monster that hurt me when I was younger. This has honestly become my life. Sitting in my room alone, because I'm terrified of what might happen if I leave my room. This has really stressed me out. I've started to question everything about myself. I really just need to know if this does ever end. And some prayer would really, really help.
 
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covergirl

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Hey there,

So glad you posted this as it takes courage to come forward with your obsessive thinking like that. I have learned through biblical counseling that these obsessive thoughts you have, especially if they make you worry, is that the thoughts are actually not you- in fact it's your worst fears manifesting itself to appear to be your true desires.

You wouldn't be on here confessing, or hiding in your house all the time, etc. if you really wanted to do those things. You wouldn't care at all and probably would have done that by now with no care in your heart. Satan wants us to believe that our fears are actually our wants or what will happen. He is the great deceiver. Think of how he tempted Jesus in the wilderness by getting Him to throw Himself off a cliff and trying to twist Scripture around at Him. In Hebrews 3 or 4 it says Jesus is able to sympathize with our weaknesses and is a compassionate High Priest. He doesn't think your weird, He knows everything about you, your thoughts, fears, worries, etc. and still loves you. I would encourage to find a true Biblical counselor who is very knowledgeable about OCD. It is helping me biblically. One thing my counselor has told me when I was delivered of things and they would try to come back is that when Jesus sets us free, it doesn't mean we won't ever get tempted to go through things again but that He set us free on the cross and sometimes in life we do go through similar things even after we been delivered of it. For example: she said depression. You start out getting healed on it and getting better as you grow in Christ, and throughout your life, there will be different circumstances or instances that happen where it comes back. Just different situations but same thing. God helped me through a depression when I was a teen (2live4christ.net) but that didn't mean I wouldn't face depression again due to OCD recently. Once I learned that, I am trying to stop beating myself up or accusing myself of being so sinful that I brought it on. we will have seasons in our life where we go through the same feelings or anxieties. Praying for you and so happy you are writing on here. God could use this to help save someone else's life.
 
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