Baptismal Name Regrets

Ioustinos · Nov 6, 2013

How many of you have met converts to Orthodoxy who, at the height of their conversion experience, were baptized into Orthodoxy with a new Christian name although they already had given Christian names. I have come in contact with a few and they have some regrets for this, primarily because at their baptism or chrismation they took on very exotic Christian names and now struggle with what to be called at Church - given name vs baptismal name - and would like to be able to go by their baptismal name but because of its "exotic-ness" (for a lack of a better term) do not do so.

Have any of you had experience with this? One of them I know would like to go back to their given name - even within a sacramental setting - but I don't think this is allowed, is it?

ArmyMatt · Nov 6, 2013

never heard of that personally, but I know a few who took baptismal names when their given name was also Christian, and they just personally go by their given name in their day to day (even when in Church), and use their baptismal name when praying or going to a sacrament. I have a friend named Lincoln, baptismal name James, who goes by James when going to Communion or whatever, but we all still call him Lincoln.

chapdaddy · Nov 6, 2013

My wife agonized between two names before being baptized and sometimes still wishes she had taken the other but I don't know why since she is only called by that name at the chalice.

Protoevangel · Nov 6, 2013

I know married people who chose their partner with impure motives, perhaps because they were exotic. Some of them regret their choice. Others have worked on their relationship and begun to love their partner.

Not a perfect analogy, but I think there is a similarity.

InnerPhyre · Nov 6, 2013

The solution is just to be tonsured a reader as soon as possible and then you can take another name

Ioustinos · Nov 6, 2013

InnerPhyre said:
The solution is just to be tonsured a reader as soon as possible and then you can take another name

I thought the only time that one's name was changed, after baptism/chrismation, was ordination into one of the major orders - priest and bishop - or monasticism (since it is seen as a "2nd" baptism)?

I also wonder if, once we are able to have a more unified Orthodoxy in the US, if our Church will come out with a more unified approach to converts - re. baptism/chrismation vs chrismation only for protestants, name changes, etc.

GenetoJean · Nov 6, 2013

Is it tradition or a rule that Orthodox "change" yalls name when being baptised?

RobNJ · Nov 6, 2013

GenetoJean said:
Is it tradition or a rule that Orthodox "change" yalls name when being baptised?

Well, it's common to, if you don't have a Saint;s name, for a first name. There were two other people joining the church, when I did. Without "comparing notes", all three of us used our middle names.

Antony in Tx · Nov 6, 2013

No regrets here...my given name from birth was Antony and my birthday just happens to fall on the feast day of St Antony the Great. It was a no brainer for me to just keep it!!! Everyone should have it so easy.

choirfiend · Nov 6, 2013

You receive a Christian name at baptism--if you get baptised as a baby, you probably get called by that name normally. If you havent been named a Christian name and you're getting baptised as an adult, you would choose one.

GenetoJean · Nov 6, 2013

choirfiend said:
You receive a Christian name at baptism--if you get baptised as a baby, you probably get called by that name normally. If you havent been named a Christian name and you're getting baptised as an adult, you would choose one.

What is the definition of a Christian name?

Knee V · Nov 6, 2013

GenetoJean said:
What is the definition of a Christian name?

The name of someone that is on the calendar of any Orthodox synod (not all saints are popular or known of or commemorated in every single Orthodox church). Many "new" names come from martyrs who were killed before they were baptized and took a new name, and thus their non-christian names became sanctified.

GenetoJean · Nov 7, 2013

knee-v said:
The name of someone that is on the calendar of any Orthodox synod (not all saints are popular or known of or commemorated in every single Orthodox church). Many "new" names come from martyrs who were killed before they were baptized and took a new name, and thus their non-christian names became sanctified.

Thank you. I love learning.

Kristos · Nov 7, 2013

I've never heard of someone regretting their baptismal name choice.

Trying_to_be_Orthodox · Nov 7, 2013

@Kirillos

Having 2 names is standart situation for Russia.
Solution is as Armymatt wrote:friend named Lincoln, baptismal name James, who goes by James when going to Communion or whatever, but we all still call him Lincoln.

but I don't think this is allowed, is it? - yep.

Dewi Sant · Nov 7, 2013

I was chrismated with my birth name, which is a Christian one and a recognised Orthodox saint.

If I took another name, it would easily be David (Dewi Sant is my online name for this board, but the association goes a lot further).

Back when I was Chrismated, if it were left to me, I could well have been Constantine, or Theophilus. Well, Constantine isn't shortened easily. Apparently it is 'Gus'. And as for Theophilus, the shortened form 'Theo' is a little presumptive

Still, Mozart impresses me with his name.
'Johannes Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Theophilus Mozart' (Theophilus was later latinised as 'Amadeus').

Philothei · Nov 10, 2013

Like with anything else.....we humans are restless IMHO...
I do not like my name ...and I was baptized as a baby...so what?

I am not planning on changing it lol.... We have non-christian names in Greece too...like they have in Serbia I heard...names of flowers like "rose" "carnation" etc they are also given a christian name....I do not see a big of a deal here....

HalupkiMonster · Nov 10, 2013

OP, I went (go) through exactly that.

I chose Tikhon, Patriarch of Russia and apostle to the Americans. I thought the name suited me, and I love St. Tikhon, who is a truly American saint.

However, as time went by, I started to regret my choice. My middle name is Michael, after all, and I have lately had great devotion to St. Michael.

Some people call me Tikhon, some call me my secular name. It really doesn't bother me too much, though. I see myself as "Tikhon." If others don't, that's their problem, I guess.

Part of my heritage is Ukrainian, however, so sometimes I feel good as though I'm doing a little tribute to that with my name.

HalupkiMonster · Nov 10, 2013

Trying_to_be_Orthodox said:
@Kirillos

Having 2 names is standart situation for Russia.
Solution is as Armymatt wrote:friend named Lincoln, baptismal name James, who goes by James when going to Communion or whatever, but we all still call him Lincoln.

but I don't think this is allowed, is it? - yep.

This is the situation with many older Americans, especially those with Eastern European parents who immigrated long ago. They wanted their children to have saints' names, but also generic American names, so they did this.

E.C. · Nov 11, 2013

Dewi Sant said:
Back when I was Chrismated, if it were left to me, I could well have been Constantine, or Theophilus. Well, Constantine isn't shortened easily. Apparently it is 'Gus'. And as for Theophilus, the shortened form 'Theo' is a little presumptive

I've been called: Costa, Kostya, Costas, Kostachi and Constantine. I remember one sweet little old Greek lady named Helen tried to call me Gus. Poor woman didn't know that I have Gus-induced deafness

Baptismal Name Regrets

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Smash the Patriarchy!

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It's phonetic.

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