I'm not sure I am a survivor

GreatSpeckledBird · Jun 25, 2013

Hi. I'm here to admit to all here I'm an abuse victim but not sure I'm a survivor yet but I'm working on it.

There's two areas I seek help in.
1/ the strength, courage & wisdom to free myself from my abusers
2/ healing from the abuse

this world seems so hateful to me. So many people are just so terrible to one another. If everyone had just done what Jesus told us to do then none of this would be happening. Love God & love one another. Why is that so difficult?

God bless
God is love

EstherStar · Jun 25, 2013

There does seem to me that there is more hatred, and selfishness in the world I suppose the answer is to start with yourself. Pray for the grace not to be brought down to that level and respond to the needs of people around you.

They crucified Jesus and they will try to crucify us. Jesus said ' in this world you will have trouble but take heart I have overcome the world' John 16.33.

You might feel like smashing someones teeth in lol but turn away from it no matter how tempting. Turn the other cheek and walk away. You're the Bride.

Ed: I know a bit about abuse too. I need to head out sorry.. but in a nutshell get away from them and the past. Cut out poisonous people from your life. )

(For me thats easier said than done.. i've got a vile, abusive stalker who keeps obsessively following me around telling me how vile i am. (wierd)...Anyway these things are sent to try us.
.

Peace

GreatSpeckledBird · Jun 25, 2013

ok thank you estherStar

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

Speckle I'm really concerned about you. Are you in physical danger? (Not that any other type of abuse is less concerning but I want to know if you are physically safe)

GreatSpeckledBird · Jun 25, 2013

LottyH said:
Speckle I'm really concerned about you. Are you in physical danger? (Not that any other type of abuse is less concerning but I want to know if you are physically safe)

no it's verbal, mental and emotional abuse.

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

GreatSpeckledBird said:
no it's verbal, mental and emotional abuse.

That can be as detrimental to your physical health as well as your emotional health. I know you must have thought of leaving? Speckle you are too precious, too cherished to be in this situation. I pray with all my heart for you.

Edit: I'm guessing you saw your family members again that you were talking about in another post. This is just not on, you deserve so much better.

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

Lord, I pray for your daughter Speckle here today. I lift her up to you for protection and guidance in all situations. I pray that you will give Speckle strength to hold her shield of faith between herself and her abusers, as a protective barrier that reflects the abuse back without touching her. I also pray that your healing will radiate into Speckle, touching her wounds, and tending to the scars making them shrink and disappear. Father, give Speckle wisdom, courage, strength and direction to deal with this situation as you see fit. I pray this in the might name of our Lord, saviour, our healer, our deliverer, Jesus Christ.

GreatSpeckledBird · Jun 25, 2013

Yes I know. Ibs, heart stress & severe depression. and i've daydreamed a lot of running away but have little will or courage to actually do it. When I have more time I'll give you some details so you will know exactly what I'm talking about. right now, I'm having to leave and I'll talk to you later.

You are a great blessing to me Lotty. I'm not sure you have any idea how God is using you on this board but i'm serious when I tell you it may have very well saved my life & also the state of my eternal destiny because I was absolutely desperate when I got here. The people have no idea how important they are here, offering help to those who have no hope. It's vitally important. PLease know that.

God bless

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

You know something hilarious, I have been really annoyed at people using clichés today. And the armour of God was one thing that has really annoyed me because people say 'put the armour of God on'. And its annoyed me because I've never understood how it worked. So the reason its hilarious is because whenever I criticise others I seem to do the exact same thing. I actually said this in another post too.

But I think I understand the armour of God now. What about you?

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

I think our posts crossed. I know you have to go now. May God protect you today and bless you abundantly in this life, but most importantly in the life to come. Speak again soon

EstherStar · Jun 25, 2013

Do you know thats interesting because i sensed you was having a sidelong swipe at me about talking in cliches Sister. I just thought it best to conclude it was paranoia. Whats the problem? Come and have a chat in pm if i wind you up for some reason. It must be more than just talking about the armour of God.

Lets have a chat.

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

EstherStar said:
There does seem to me that there is more hatred, and selfishness in the world I suppose the answer is to start with yourself. Pray for the grace not to be bought down to that level and respond to the needs of people around you.

They crucified Jesus and they will try to crucify us. Jesus said ' in this world you will have trouble but take heart I have overcome the world' John 16.33.

You might feel like smashing someones teeth in lol but turn away from it no matter how tempting. Turn the other cheek and walk away. You're the Bride.

Ed: I know a bit about abuse too. I need to head out sorry.. but in a nutshell get away from them and the past. Cut out poisonous people from your life. )

(For me thats easier said than done.. i've got a vile, abusive stalker who keeps obsessively following me around telling me how vile i am. (wierd)...Anyway these things are sent to try us.
.

Peace

Praying for you Estherstar, that God delivers you from that abusive stalker. Hope you are okay.

EstherStar · Jun 25, 2013

Yes i'm praying that too. Lets have a chat in pm.

LottyH · Jun 25, 2013

EstherStar said:
Do you know thats interesting because i sensed you was having a sidelong swipe at me about talking in cliches Sister. I just thought it best to conclude it was paranoia. Whats the problem? Come and have a chat in pm if i wind you up for some reason. It must be more than just talking about the armour of God.

Lets have a chat.

No it wasn't you at all!!!!! Please don't think that. It was earlier on today. Someone was showing a real lack of compassion to someone and just throwing clichés. I was more annoyed at the lack of compassion than anything else. You are a darling, I would never say that about you.

EstherStar · Jun 25, 2013

No you said it yesterday 2 posts after i talked about the armour.

Pm please or finish it now. I dont want to bang on about it.

Armour..Post 24 How can i never sin for the rest of my life please help 12.49pm

Your sidelong swipe Post 667 How Are You Feeling Right Now? 1.14 pm

Like I said in pm. I'm not the most eloquent of women. But the posts i've written have been sincere.

Spunkn · Jun 25, 2013

If you ever need someone to talk to Speckle just let me know, I'm pretty harmless

Jb9 · Jul 17, 2013

When you come to entrusting your life to God, everything around you seems alleviated.

I'm not sure I am a survivor

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