Your longest relationship?

Obzocky

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See i dont get how ppl can be in relationships for yrs upon yrs and never end up getting married.

For me it was age. Too young to marry without parental permission for the first few years, planning to marry for the next, then pulling out at the last minute. If I hadn't of had a freakout i'd be married. Or divorced. One or the other.
 
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wannaberocker

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For me it was age. Too young to marry without parental permission for the first few years, planning to marry for the next, then pulling out at the last minute. If I hadn't of had a freakout i'd be married. Or divorced. One or the other.

See my view is that in the first few yrs of a relationship you pretty much know the person you are with. YOu know things you like about them and things you dont like. There are no huge surprises where you are surprised and "what they are really like". So i think at that point, how can it turn to "oh yeah this isnt working out lets break up".


YOu know, if i had invested yrs into a relationshp and wasnt sure that i wanted to marry that girl. Id get out long before and wouldnt stick around for yrs.
 
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Obzocky

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It was very easy for me, for numerous reasons.

I can't fathom marrying someone until we've dated for at least 2 years. The first year to get to know each other, the second to get over the initial fluff, and then when we enter the third we can seriously consider marriage. But then I have to factor in mental health issues, a lot of people love me during my manic/stable phases, my depression is much harder to deal with, even when medicated.

So I figure 2 years of dating and the third year for serious marriage talks gives them enough time to bail and/or let the infatuation subside long enough to seriously consider the baggage i'm bringing to the table. For relatively normal individuals who do not have to worry about depressive/manic cycles I guess it would be different.

Edit: as it stands my preference is 5 years of dating with the last year or two being reserved for the serious-serious discussion of marriage. Once marriage is agreed upon then that's that, but I want to make sure that when I tie the knot they know what they're getting into, i'm serious about trying to stabilise myself, and we're all aware of how much hard work it's going to take.
 
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Holygeneral79

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See i dont get how ppl can be in relationships for yrs upon yrs and never end up getting married.

Well, people learn from mistakes. Next Jesus-loving gal God sends my way I'm marrying her within 1 year. I know many people that held relationships for a long time (5+ years) and got married, and I guess that's fine. But now that I look back, if you are ok with your partner after a year or two and you're old enough to be man or a woman before God, then it is just more beneficial to get married. That's what I'm going to do with the next lucky lady :D
 
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wannaberocker

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It was very easy for me, for numerous reasons.

I can't fathom marrying someone until we've dated for at least 2 years. The first year to get to know each other, the second to get over the initial fluff, and then when we enter the third we can seriously consider marriage. But then I have to factor in mental health issues, a lot of people love me during my manic/stable phases, my depression is much harder to deal with, even when medicated.

So I figure 2 years of dating and the third year for serious marriage talks gives them enough time to bail and/or let the infatuation subside long enough to seriously consider the baggage i'm bringing to the table. For relatively normal individuals who do not have to worry about depressive/manic cycles I guess it would be different.

Edit: as it stands my preference is 5 years of dating with the last year or two being reserved for the serious-serious discussion of marriage. Once marriage is agreed upon then that's that, but I want to make sure that when I tie the knot they know what they're getting into, i'm serious about trying to stabilise myself, and we're all aware of how much hard work it's going to take.

Well the good part is that you understand the areas you need work on.
 
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wannaberocker

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Well, people learn from mistakes. Next Jesus-loving gal God sends my way I'm marrying her within 1 year. I know many people that held relationships for a long time (5+ years) and got married, and I guess that's fine. But now that I look back, if you are ok with your partner after a year or two and you're old enough to be man or a woman before God, then it is just more beneficial to get married. That's what I'm going to do with the next lucky lady :D

yeah, i mean when i was a sunday christian only. I use to have thoughts of long term dating and then marriage etc. But then over the yrs as i developed a stronger relationship with God. My mindset changed from "why would i get involved with someone if i didnt eventually intend to marry them.
 
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Miss Spaulding

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yeah, i mean when i was a sunday christian only. I use to have thoughts of long term dating and then marriage etc. But then over the yrs as i developed a stronger relationship with God. My mindset changed from "why would i get involved with someone if i didnt eventually intend to marry them.

I fully agree with this.

My idea of a relationship is one where both parties are pretty certain that they've found their future spouse and the relationship will eventually end in marriage. Otherwise, the relationship would be no more than purely selfish and pointless.
 
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Rhye

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Almost 4 years for me. Dated for 2.5 years, Got married, and 9 months later she says it's just completely unrealistic for two people to stay together forever because people are constantly changing.

Isn't that the whole point?
Change is scary but also very beautiful.
 
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Rose of Eden

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1 year. But I had known him real well for about 6 years before we started dating.

In general, I prefer taking relationships and romance very, very slowly. I won't enter any sort of exclusive, committed relationship with a man unless I've known him well for a while. Six months is a bare minimum. Eight months to a year is preferable.
 
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PinkSweetart

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I was dating a guy on and off for about 6 months. But if you probably added all the days we actually saw each other it'd probably only amount to about a month or two.

Dating sucks and I quite like being single. :D
 
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