I am trying to become a Christian. But my living situation is making it very difficult. I had a son before marriage, and I live with his father. The problem with it is, I am trying to stop doing immoral acts. But he doesn't try to support what I am doing. He gets extremely mad when I don't give in. It's causing me a lot of anxiety. I have not slept good in over a month. I wake up to panic attacks. I am so tense my neck and back are constantly sore, and now I have a numb sensation in my face. It's all causing so much stress. I believe its my punishment for all my sins. I have no where else to go. My family is also non supportive with me trying to be a Christian. It's very troubling. I don't make enough to get a place. I feel trapped. I love my boyfriend. But I feel like all I am is an object. It's making me bitter. I have physical issues, that I'm not sure is related to my anxiety. But it gets so bad, some days I feel like I'm dying. I'm scared I may have MS. There is just so much, and I don't have many to talk to. I just wish someone could say something that will bring light to my darkness. I have been under a dark cloud for way to long. It's hard to have faith when nothing is going away. I just want to be a strong mother. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. But I'm lacking all of that.