Deeply depressed - please help? Advice?

I will pray for you.

Flower, I don't know what state you are going to, but here are some suggestions:

1) Call a local church or two and find out what you can about temporary housing.
2) Call the Salvation Army, sometimes they have temporary apartments or housing.
3) Call the local welfare office, they may be able to suggest something.
God bless, I'm praying for you. Love, Miss Elly

flowerforever7 said:

Hi,

I am deeply depressed. Basic situation:

*Moved to another state, have been helping to take care of my mother who is disabled
*Lost two people to suicide in the past 3 months (a friend and my brother) Had to take care of the final arrangements for my brother.
*Have a very severe form of OCD, can't take SSRIs because some of them are known to reduce serotonin over time 40 -60%. That is the last thing my OCD afflicted brain needs as low serotonin is sited as a causative factor in OCD. My OCD extremely debilitating to the point where I have prayed for God to end my life. Though I have thought about suicide, I won't commit it due to not knowing if I will end up in Hell or not.
*I need to get a car
*I need to find a job
*I don't want to go back up north where my old job is. The job offer I got I need to give them indication if I want it or not in a week. The pay is just enough to pretty much cover my bills, without being able to save much of anything after my pay. They want a long term commitment. It is in an industry I have no interest in whatsoever. I have to move out of where I am at by Mar 1. The state I want to move to, I cannot find anyone who will allow my Mom and I to stay as guests for just a week to check it out.
*I feel like I am throwing away my dreams. I am really depressed.
*I am thinking about going on some type of benzo or beta-blocker to deal.

Anyone got any suggestions, advice? Prayers are appreciated.

Thanks.

Click to expand...

I am so sorry you are going through so much, I will be praying for you

Moving to another state is so rough, plus, taking care of a loved one is very stressful. Have you thought of looking into having a care giver come in maybe once a week, that way, you could get out a little and clear your mind.

How tragic that you lost 2 people to suicide. Have you considered going to your church pastor and talking it out with him/her.

You poor dear. Having OCD is very hard on a person. I can not take any drugs for depression, they all work opposite on me. So, I have a doctor who is a naturopath, for anxiety, depression, she has recommended some things, I will tell you about them.
1. L. Tryptophan, this is an amino acid that acts better than a SSRI, and has no side effects. You can get it at a health food store. A good version of it is 5 HTP, many folks have had great results with it.

2. L. Taurine, another great mood elevator and helps the neurotransmitters in your brain. Just a month ago, I was not even to post here, go out in public much, I was a mess, well, I started taking this, and I mean to tell you, the change is fantastic, I give the Lord all the credit for this.

3. Magnesium Glycinate, this will help you relax, and is the best from of magnesium as it is rapidly absorbable and really smooths your nerves out, I take it and I have been on it a month, that is about how long it takes to work. I take it mainly for occasional skipped heart beats, they scare the be-jeepers out of me, LOL, but, I am so much, praise the Lord.

4. Fish oil, this is great for neurotransmitters as well, plus, great for lowering blood fats.

5. Take a good "B" vitamin, I would suggest at least 100mg twice or three times a day.

The bible does not condone suicide, it is the same as murder and only our Lord can take us home. Please please do not even think about it, that is the "enemy" putting those thoughts in your head. If those thoughts get too bad, please see a godly counselor. Please, you are very special to our Lord, and He loves you so much, He knows what is going, even though He is not answering right now, He knows, keep praying without ceasing. We all care, keep coming here too.

You need a car? Have you thought about renting one for a short time, some folks do that when they can not afford to purchase one out-right.

Where have you been looking for work? I am not sure where you live, but, some states, if the doctor signs a slip, you can get paid by the state to take care of your parents, or they will help with what you need. Just a thought, check around and call the local hospital to see if they know of any such agencies.

Ask a local church if they know of anyone who would be willing to let you and your mum to stay with them for a week, sometimes they can come up some very good ideas.

You are not throwing away your dreams, they are just on hold for the time being, you will be able to recapture them again, right now, the Lord wants you to help your mother, the dreams will follow later. Be patient and keep praying and reading the word daily.

I am not familiar with benzos. I have heard of beta blockers, I do not know how well they work for your problem, I would certainly look into some of the products I suggested first.

Hang on to Jesus, this will all pass and you do have better days ahead of you, you are in a valley right now, all Christians go through valleys, the Lord is with you, He will lead if you let Him.

Hugs
Prayers
Susie

Sending prayers!

I'm sorry, sweetie
I don't suffer from OCD, but I know how hard it can be to deal with.
Praying that God opens doors for you and makes it very clear what his plan is in all this.

sorry you are hurting so much dear sister i hope you can use your music gift to praise God, you are so dearly loved by God always!

It sure sounds like you have a lot on your plate. I am praying right now, precious sister.

Just do something that makes you feel you are progressing. It's tough but try walking around the block and thinking of goals you hope to accomplish. I do suffer from severe depression.

I am praying now.

flowerforever7 said:

Hi,

That would be nice, but the problem I have with my OCD is that almost everytime I try to think of things that I want to accomplish or do I get an urge to deny myself of it, and then when I feel angry that I have that urge to deny myself of it, I get a blasphemous intrusive thought or feeling against God's Spirit. Or if I think of something I want to accomplish sometimes my being able to do it becomes ruined because somehow I will see some part of it as sin, or feel convicted to fast from it, or will get a blasphemous intrusive thought when thinking about it, or I get irritated at all the urges to deny myself of what is in front of me or what I am wanting at the moment and an aggressive blasphemous thought or feeling shoots out toward the Holy Spirit. This happens with most things I want to do, from having a bowl of cereal, posting a video on Facebook, pursuing a dream, choosing a place to live. Part of my OCD is I make excessive compulsive vows to God and feel like I cannot break them. Or I have excessive urges to fast from things I want. It seems like most everything I want to set out to do becomes forbidden even if it is something morally neutral. It is exausting and obviously depressing to live like this. Not a day goes by I do not experience this, and urges to curse God even happen when I am sleeping. It is so freaking discouraging. Just saying.

Click to expand...

I can't say I understand OCD but I can feel your pain and helplessness as I read your message. I pray that you can surrender yourself, surrender all these thoughts and urges completely by trusting in God completely so that you can love yourself, be kind to yourself because God loves you. Whenever in doubt or whenever those thoughts and urges take a stronghold in your mind, seek God's wisdom in the scriptures to give you clarity and truth.

1 John 4:17-19
"By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us."

Deuteronomy 31:6
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."

Proverbs 3:16
"For the LORD shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken."

Philippians 3:13-14
Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

When things become too hard, singing a hymn that touches your heart can lift you up a lot

Example: You raise me up

Music can be found at: (It's at YouTube but I can't post the link here yet as my post count has not reached 50 or greater)-
It's sung by Josh Groban

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up... To more than I can be.

You raise me up... To more than I can be.

flowerforever7 said:

Hi,

That would be nice, but the problem I have with my OCD is that almost everytime I try to think of things that I want to accomplish or do I get an urge to deny myself of it, and then when I feel angry that I have that urge to deny myself of it, I get a blasphemous intrusive thought or feeling against God's Spirit. Or if I think of something I want to accomplish sometimes my being able to do it becomes ruined because somehow I will see some part of it as sin, or feel convicted to fast from it, or will get a blasphemous intrusive thought when thinking about it, or I get irritated at all the urges to deny myself of what is in front of me or what I am wanting at the moment and an aggressive blasphemous thought or feeling shoots out toward the Holy Spirit. This happens with most things I want to do, from having a bowl of cereal, posting a video on Facebook, pursuing a dream, choosing a place to live. Part of my OCD is I make excessive compulsive vows to God and feel like I cannot break them. Or I have excessive urges to fast from things I want. It seems like most everything I want to set out to do becomes forbidden even if it is something morally neutral. It is exausting and obviously depressing to live like this. Not a day goes by I do not experience this, and urges to curse God even happen when I am sleeping. It is so freaking discouraging. Just saying.

Click to expand...

\\

Dear Flower, all of your friends are praying for you on Worthy. I am praying that you will be completely delivered from this OCD and other things in your life that you need deliverance from. Imagine Jesus, if you lived back when He did on earth, laying a hand of love on your head and saying "be healed my child". I am going to pray for this experience for you now. God can heal anything, mental illness included! Love you! Miss Elly

My prayers.