I am new to this thread and need some advice

First of all, I need to be clear on what you mean by "get physical". do you mean like physically intimidating your person, pushing, grabbing, or in some way threatening your personal safety? If that's the case then you need to make certain you have a completely safe place (away from your home) to retreat to when this happens. This is hurtful and very serious behaviour.

If you mean things like punching walls, throwing objects, yelling, but not making actual contact with your person, then you still need to make sure you're completely safe, but understand that he's crossed a control line in his own behaviour, and it can easily escalate into something much more hurtful.

TELL a TRUSTED FRIEND or supporter. Pray with your supporter. Pray with your husband. Get friends and supporters praying for you, and for your husband.

Love him. Honour your vows and your commitment to him. Keep praying. But stay safe.

I would also like to know what you mean by "get physical".

No yelling or violence in my marriage just arguments. However I'm glad that my wife isn't a physical person because I hate to have my person touched in that manner and I was raised if you hit a person you get hit back. I don't like to be hit so I have never hit anybody first my wife has never hit any body so we are pretty good on that.




My first comment is that you have no right no matter what to put your hand on any man therefore with that comes the risk of being hit back. Secondly if you are being hit without hitting first then your husband has some serious issues and for your own safety and his legal freedom I recommend a a seperation. Finally if one or two is true marriage counseling is needed

Were you aware of this physical behaviour before you married him??
Or did it just pop up in the 6 months you've been married?
Because if he was an 'angel' beforehand and just 6 months into the marriage is already shoving you around - I'd say leave before he does some serious damage.

No woman deserves to live in fear of being physically hurt by their spouse.

- Niff

pixies27 said:

I am new to this thread and need some advice ,I have only been married going on six months now how do you make a marriage work ,when your husband during an arguement gets physical with you ?

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You should call the free hotlines for abused women. They can give you the best advice as to your rights, and they can also offer you a safe place. I don't care what "physical" means. Whether it's pushing, slapping, or kicking - it's all abuse - and it is not your wifely duty or responsibility to put up with abuse.

Good advice posted here so far. Whatever you do, do it quick. These kinds of things do tend to escalate and you do not want that. You really don't.

Niffer said:

Were you aware of this physical behaviour before you married him??
Or did it just pop up in the 6 months you've been married?
Because if he was an 'angel' beforehand and just 6 months into the marriage is already shoving you around - I'd say leave before he does some serious damage.

No woman deserves to live in fear of being physically hurt by their spouse.

- Niff

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She never said he hits her what if she shoves him and he pushes her back. You are assuming a lot.

Avniel said:

She never said he hits her what if she shoves him and he pushes her back. You are assuming a lot.

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RE-READ The OP's original post!!!!! SHE said "How do you make a marriage work when in an argument your husband gets physical with you?"

That's not really assuming anything. I think YOU are the one assuming here..........

Any sort of violence has no place in a marriage. Even if I pushed my husband (which obviously no woman should do), I know he'd never push back. There is a line a man should never cross.

Aibrean said:

Any sort of violence has no place in a marriage. Even if I pushed my husband (which obviously no woman should do), I know he'd never push back. There is a line a man should never cross.

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^^^ This.

Not to derail - but if I tried to shove my husband with all my strength, he'd hardly move an inch.
If he shoved me with all his strength, I'd be across the room and unconcious after slamming into the wall.

I'd say there's a difference here, and most judges would agree.

Peace,
- Niffer

pixies27 said:

I am new to this thread and need some advice ,I have only been married going on six months now how do you make a marriage work ,when your husband during an arguement gets physical with you ?

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You do whatever it takes to make it stop - whatever level of "physical" it is.

I will be praying for you, your husband, and your marriage.

c1ners said:

RE-READ The OP's original post!!!!! SHE said "How do you make a marriage work when in an argument your husband gets physical with you?"

That's not really assuming anything. I think YOU are the one assuming here..........

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My bad my bad I was phone posting I missed that part sorry jump down my throat.

"I think YOU are the one assuming" some people need to lay off the double shot of caffine...Calm down relax its going to be ok I made mistake.

To give help to the OP, I think she just needs to be taken at her word and given support and assistance. When a new person comes here, and she or he is sad and hurt, the last thing she needs is to experience a big wrangling session about who pushes who. Let's just take her at her word, in trust and love, like Christians should, and give her prayer and support.

Call an abused women hotline, find a safe shelter, pack up your things while he's out of the house and leave.

If a friend that you cared deeply about asked you this question, would you truly want them to remain in the marriage another moment to be abused any more?

pixies27 said:

ok by physical I mean choking, throwing you across the room and punching walls fans blacking out

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In this case, the answer to your question is: you don't. You leave and do not return unless that behavior is 100% gone.

My opinion, of course.

Call an abused woman hotline, when he is not home, pack your things and get out. No one should be in fear for their life from their spouse, parents, relatives, coworkers - whatsoever. That is not a normal relationship.

EmilyF said:

Call an abused women hotline, find a safe shelter, pack up your things while he's out of the house and leave.

If a friend that you cared deeply about asked you this question, would you truly want them to remain in the marriage another moment to be abused any more?

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Audiomechanic said:

In this case, the answer to your question is: you don't. You leave and do not return unless that behavior is 100% gone.

My opinion, of course.

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MessianicMommy said:

Call an abused woman hotline, when he is not home, pack your things and get out. No one should be in fear for their life from their spouse, parents, relatives, coworkers - whatsoever. That is not a normal relationship.

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This ^^.