- Jul 17, 2009
- 2,057
- 303
- Faith
- United Ch. of Christ
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Others
My marriage has been struggling for a few years. Lately, it's been really tense and awful and it was like my husband couldn't even speak to me. A few weeks ago he announced that he was miserable and thinking of leaving. I had a lot of reasons to suspect an affair but after 16 years of marriage and 3 kids...I didn't believe he was the type. Tonight he said he needed to talk so I put a movie on for the two younger kids(the oldest was at my inlaws) and we went into the bedroom and as we sat on our bed talking about whether or not to separate....he decided to come clean about an affair. He shared a few details...who it was(as I suspected) and the fact that they were intimate in our bed. I can't express the pain I felt at that moment. I knew in my heart he had cheated...and I thought I was prepared...but hearing it..and knowing how it played out...and looking around our bedroom at the pictures of my babies and my family..and realizing that she was in my house..in my bed...in my bathroom...that she walked by my children's rooms..that she probably pet my dogs..and walked down the hall to our room and walked past the many pictures I have hanging of our families over the years....I can barely stand that level of betrayal. Knowing the days they were together...it's too much.
His reaction was terrible. He was angry with me. I didn't scream, yell or cry. I calmly asked him to go to his brother's house for a few days while I digested the information. He left. I emailed the woman and told her that my husband confessed to everything and that it was no longer a secret. I didn't use foul language with her...I sent her a two line message. Apparently she called my husband and he called and berated me for being vindictive. I have access to her husbands email, her children...friends and family...I didn't email any of them...just her..and I simply said.. I know. He told me everything. He told me he cared about her, he didn't want to see her hurt and she was the innocent one in all this...that the affair was something he and I had to own together. I could hardly believe he said it.
I can't sleep. I have a lot ahead of me the next few days. I have to explain to my children why their dad is gone. I feel like I could throw up when I think about what that will be like. So please...pray for me and my children right now. I married him when I was 19 years old. I've been with him for 20 years total....he's been a part of me my whole life and I truly feel like my world was ripped out from under me.
His reaction was terrible. He was angry with me. I didn't scream, yell or cry. I calmly asked him to go to his brother's house for a few days while I digested the information. He left. I emailed the woman and told her that my husband confessed to everything and that it was no longer a secret. I didn't use foul language with her...I sent her a two line message. Apparently she called my husband and he called and berated me for being vindictive. I have access to her husbands email, her children...friends and family...I didn't email any of them...just her..and I simply said.. I know. He told me everything. He told me he cared about her, he didn't want to see her hurt and she was the innocent one in all this...that the affair was something he and I had to own together. I could hardly believe he said it.
I can't sleep. I have a lot ahead of me the next few days. I have to explain to my children why their dad is gone. I feel like I could throw up when I think about what that will be like. So please...pray for me and my children right now. I married him when I was 19 years old. I've been with him for 20 years total....he's been a part of me my whole life and I truly feel like my world was ripped out from under me.