judgemental, for no real reason

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

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At this time you ought to be glad you don't have to judge yourself as GOD would judge YOU!


Have you ever asked yourself why GOD told us JUDGEMENT IS HIS?


You should be real glad that GOD doesn't allow me to judge you on what you wrote. I'm real glad to because I know you are a babe in CHRIST and are in the early leaning stag.


Remember GOD is going to judge you as you judge others. That's his WORD to us.


So remember the very next time you judge someone you are then making the same judgement on yourself.


I would almost be willing to bet, your really a sweet thing or you wouldn't be here looking for answers.


LOVE


steven

Maybe this is God teaching me a hard lesson. Maybe it's coincidence. But I find that if I think ill of somebody, I find myself doing the same things some time later.

Hi!

I recall doing the same thing often and moreso when I was younger. I would categorize people and like you, just in my head.

I think is possible we do it because it makes us feel better about ourselves as we compare ourselves with another and so is sort of like a false boost.

I see things pop up in me which are hideous and thanks be to God we have help to grow.

As our minds are renewed/changed which is an ongoing process as we're in the bible, and praying, and learning, we change and grow.

Whatever it is that you are dealing with as regards this, bring it to Jesus, and tell Jesus how you do that and how you feel about these people and ask God for help in seeing others as He sees us/them.

We will always be having stuff in us that are battles, whether it be prejudice or anything at all, and so is a life long of growing and changing our minds on things.

The love chapter here might be good to read every day as it helps put in perspective about how to view/treat others. As well seeing how Jesus was with people in the bible also helps a great deal.

Here's that bit from the love chapter:

BibleGateway.com - PassageLookup: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

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The above is a bit about how we love others, by doing or not doing the things given above.

These challenges will always arise. We'll be doing great and boom - meet someone can't stand and just all in our hearts and minds, and yet working with God through these love things, helps us to love as Jesus loves; even if only in our hearts and minds as person might never know how we feel; but we change inwardly and the outward also changes.

The very thing you are doing; sharing how you feel inside; is very good because by doing so, you are aware of how you are thinking on certain matters and it takes thinking about things and wondering why we feel that way to recognize it and to be able to change it if needs changing.

Television and school (peer stuff) has a great deal of why there are certain perceptions we have which are not good and not realistic. There are other sources as well, but those two are the big ones.

Take care and thanks for sharing.

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

By cleansing your hands and purifying your heart.

By transforming and renewing your brain and your heart.

By submitting and drawing near to HIM.

You see my dear sister, if you have those thoughts in your mind, then they will go to your heart and your feelings will spill out of your mouth, and the tongue will do its poisonous deeds.

Basically, what you are seeing in them is what may be in you?

You need to overcome and conquer your own shortingcomings, and attitudes, and then you will not be seduced by the enemy, the roaring lion who roams around seeking who he can devour.

I have found when we see pride in another person, we are seeing the same pride that is in us.

So when we see these things in another person, we are seeing what is in us.

Blessings.

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

By beholding and embracing the way The Lord sees / judges .

But the LORD said to Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the LORD sees not as man sees; for man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart. <-----> 1st Samuel 16:7

Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment. <-----> John 7:24

Which is compatible also with the saying , " Don't be quick to judge " .

***********************************************************

quote=twistedsketch;52368062]Maybe this is God teaching me a hard lesson. Maybe it's coincidence. But I find that if I think ill of somebody, I find myself doing the same things some time later.

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Yea , this happens , and is mentioned in Scripture .

Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye who are spiritual, restore such one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. <-----> Galatians 6:1

Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seems to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise. <-----> 1st Corinthians 3:18

May The Lord Be Pleased !

wm

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

You can get around this by listening to the Spirit of Christ in your heart: by listening to your heart. The very same Spirit of Christ which has compelled you to notice this as a problem.

Materially, remember the words of Jesus which were unlike the words of any other man when he said, "Love your enemies".

Who is your enemy? Are they wearing suits, or earrings in their nose? Are they blue collar with blunt speech, or are they women that wear different sorts of clothes then you? Are they careful in all they do, or are they cheerful and relaxed? Are they of a different religion or race or political party?

Everyone has "enemies".

Remember: whatever groups you belong to, you are an individual, and so are they. Treat them as you want to be treated.

As for doctrines which groups uphold, that are wrong: sure, discuss those, but remember that individuals have their own take on their group doctrines just as you have your own take on your group's doctrines. Reason by those things with evidence, not by association.

As for approaching those of groups not following Christ: be lenient and open in this manner... listen to what they are saying, for maybe our Heavenly Father is leading them to Christ. People are raised in their own backgrounds. That is their language. That is their culture. Bringing them over means learning how to speak their language and understand their culture.

Just because their background is different then yours does not mean that God loves them any less.

So, please, consider these words and remember it is important to treat people as individuals and not judge them by mere appearances, just as Lord Jesus said.

Leave judgement to God, we should always have our door open.

bluegreysky said:

well this is really bad... i dont really have a problem with anyone's style (like gothic or preppy for example) and i don't have a problem with their financial status- so blue collar or white it doesn't matter to me...
but it figures, these are all things that most people can change
it just so happens that the types of people that i have trouble accepting have ... let's say "traits" or conditions maybe that are mostly beyond their control.
and I get uncomfortable around them.
It's something I can't really explain.

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Maybe it is a spiritual sense. That is sometimes something people can not understand. I do think it is critical to be able to isolate and find the specifics things about a person, however so your judgments are sure. People listen to evidence, even the wicked have to contend with weighty evidence.

I know there are plenty of traits I can not stand in people: lying tongues that praise you but do not mean it... they rely on flattery, while their hearts are seeking to trap you. I can't stand prideful people who love to find new things about themselves to praise themselves on. I can't stand people who follow the crowd in doing wrong and value peer acceptance over truth.

Usually, these people make themselves known real fast if you learn how to listen. Even in written words you can usually "hear" the tone of the voice, at least, that is how it is for me. That is, words can convey right away where someone is at.

How often does someone say, "Bless you!" and not mean it...

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.
My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

It might be too hard for a person to do. It might require developing a closer walk with the Lord (in order to let the Holy Spirit tackle this problem. For it is Christ in us, through the Spirit, who kills the deeds of the flesh. And the only way HE can work in us, is if we let go and let God: in other words: surrender ourselves totally to His work and His will, thus enabling Him to move in us.

But for now, it might be easier just to turn your head and not look at the person, or to stop your thoughts by the will power and focus on repeating a Bible verse or a song or something (to switch your mind focus off the person).

Also, what helps me is knowing that the Holy Spirit has to listen to all those negative thoughts in my head and that sure is unpleasant for Him. It would be like inviting a guest to come to a DIRTY house. I try to keep HIS house clean by shifting my thoughts to positive things.

Everyone has already said what I would tell you; look to God for guidance and help, to pray. One thing that I've told my friend who has a very similar problem to you, is that you never know who that person could really be, that they might be an angel in disguise. For me, that's a huge deterrent to keep all thoughts as empathetic as possible towards strangers I see.

Hebrews 13:2

Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.

bluegreysky said:

well this is really bad... i dont really have a problem with anyone's style (like gothic or preppy for example) and i don't have a problem with their financial status- so blue collar or white it doesn't matter to me...
but it figures, these are all things that most people can change
it just so happens that the types of people that i have trouble accepting have ... let's say "traits" or conditions maybe that are mostly beyond their control.
and I get uncomfortable around them.
It's something I can't really explain.

Click to expand...

I would pray that God gives you strength to overcome this, because it is through him that all weaknesses are healed.

Sorry; i'll remove it.

The poster did clarify it was not anything on the outside which bothered her, but something on the inside.

She did not elaborate, but we should know as Jesus did, through the Spirit of Jesus and purity of heart, what goes on in people's hearts.

Therefore, we definitely will come across people we know whose hearts are not right with God. As God created righteous and unrighteous alike, we are asked to love our enemies. But, this does not mean we should treat them as we treat those who are in the Spirit of God and pure of heart: look at how blunt Jesus was with the Pharisees.

They needed to hear his hard words, no one else was saying such things to them.

Once someone has heard the truth, it stays on their head.

The truth is powerful for change: for some they run further from it. But they are as wounded afterwards for that part of their heart is forever exposed.

As Paul said, Ephesians 5:

11Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. 12For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. 13But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, 14for it is light that makes everything visible.

bluegreysky said:

There are several types of people that inside my head, I judge up one way and down the other. I don't like these people.

Click to expand...

bluegreysky said:

My mind makes a stereotype, and I bet most of the time a person I see isn't like what I assume they are like.
I don't ever say anything mean to their face, but inside my head I'm thinking how much I dislike them because of these certain characteristics,
most of which are physical appearances.
I'm not sure why I think that way.

At the risk of offending someone on here, I won't state what types of people they are.

How can I be less judgmental? I'm almost afraid of these people- seeing them weirds me out.



How can I figure out a way to look past the exterior at any good they have on the inside?

Click to expand...

I can be like this as well. Ask God to help you see things differently. He will.

I used to judge people based on their skin color, ethnicity and class in society. I've learned to look at their behavior as this is more telling of who a person really is.

When you see someone with bad behavior, pray for them, and others that could be hurt by them. That may be all you can do.

Don’t be to quick to judge, they be having a bad day.