Am I at risk???

Hello,

I was just coming here looking for an answer to my question but really couldn't find out.

I am not really sure what's been going on lately but lately at times I go through phrases where I eat only a meal a day usually between 7-10 at night. When I go through the phrase it lasts for alittle while. At times I get hungry and even though I know I am hungry I won't eat at times because I just don't feel like it.

I am trying to get into the rotunie of eating three meals a day which I hate because, it's like I am less hungry when I eat one meal a day than three meals a day. My mom has never thought or questioned me about having or starting to have an ED. But at one point she was starting to call me before I went to school and asked if I ate breakfast and what did I eat. At at times ask did I eat lunch and all. I started eating more hoping that she wouldn't really ask me.


My friend somewhat feels that I will become anorexia or something, because she has been around me and sometimes not often though will ask me what did I eat today and all.


Then another time, she knew I was hungry but didn't feel like eating though so she kept trying to get me to get up and fix something to eat eventually she ended up fixing me something to eat and watching me to make sure I eat it and all of it. Even though she wasn't acting too serious I don't want them to get the idea that I am at risk of getting an ED.


I also realize that if I am mad,upset,or stressed out I tend not to sleep or eat as much. I guess it's werid because most of my friends might eat if they are upset/frustrated and all and I don't. I think it's because if I am stressed it's really the only thing that I can control. It has crossed my mind a couple/few times about to just eat as little as possible.I had the thought to do it but I don't think I have the complete will power to do it though. Mostly, because I think if I started doing that, most of my friends and family would pick up on it after a while.



For right now, I am doing good eating like I am suppose to be the thought has been on my mind lately though. Haven't tired it before though. Am I at risk for getting an ED or is it from just being tired and stressed at times(not stressed right now though) and all?



Thanks


GLGA

It's kinda hard to say, when I was younger I was slender, but now I would say that I am about average-slightly above average (my weight) also very tall. I guess if I was slender or where I use to be I would be fine but not completely sure of that. Most my friends see me as average though. But to me I feel it's mostly that I just lost interest of eating at all( at times when I am asked what do I want for b-fast/lunch for the week, most of the time I feel like just saying I don't want anything I will be okay). But I do know at one point or another I will get hungry so I have to come up with something.

I feel as if I love myself, I know there is room for alot of improvement but I still at times have those pretty days.

But I am not too sure exactly why I have this habit of not wanting to eat.

Bumping up

Steelerbred33 said:

Have you noticed any particular or specific thought/feeling in your mind or body before you decide NOT to eat?

Click to expand...

Not usually I think earlier this week I have been thinking that I need to go back to the way that I was eating before. It was because I was about to eat something because I was hungary and I was eating lunch and before I started trying to eat three meals a day I wouldn't as hungry as I was right then and there. It did kinda bother me that my body was getting use to eating three meals and suddenly I became hungry alot faster then I usually would.

I think it was one of the first times I ever looked at it like that.


Other then that usually before deciding not to eat is only if: I don't feel well,upset,worried or something like that. But I have been doing great lately haven't really been worring about anything but for some reason I am still feeling/thinking the same way.

ark_angel said:

Having an ED myself, I would have to say you already have one too. You don't have to be deathly skinny and you don't have to constantly restricting your food. But your thoughts seem to lead to you having one, especially the one of not wanting to eat as little as possible in fear you will get caught. Plus you seem to be restricting enough for your mom and friend to notice and be worried, so that tells you right there that you aren't exhibiting normal eating behaviors.
But that's just my opinion, and my advice would be to get help now before things get worse. Without any support or help things generally tend to get worse, not better. Not trying to scare you or anything, just don't want you to have to go through worse times with it.
Sometimes, even when we are feeling depressed, we just have to force ourselves to eat, no matter what.

Click to expand...

Oh okay, is there any way to deal with it other than counseling, could I just promise myself to eat three meals, do you think that could work or do you think it's going to take more to get out of this habit?

GryffinSong said:

You know, I was just thinking similarly to ark_angel this morning. That if you're worried about it, you should consider counseling now. There's probably not a single person in the world who couldn't benefit from some counseling anyway. And I think she's right that the fear of being caught is a concern. Whether your eating is physically healthy or not, it sounds like there's some guilt or fear or something already there, that you might want to deal with.

Hugs to you, and best of luck!!!

Click to expand...

Oh okay, thanks

Soulwings said:

I'm sorry it took me so long to respond to this.

Anyway... I agree with the others - it would be good to seek counseling/therapy before it gets any worse. You may be at risk for an ED - I wouldn't say that you have one now, but it does sound like you may have one in the future if you eventually act on these thoughts. You may have disordered eating now (in fact, probably do). And trust me, you do not want to have an eating disorder. No matter how intoxicating the thought of not eating and losing weight is... EDs are hell. I think that everyone on here who has gone through the same thing would agree with me.

So yes. Seek help. Be pro-active. Don't give in to the thoughts. And keep coming here for support, if you need it. PM me anytime if you need/want to talk.

Click to expand...

thanks I appericate it, but its there anyway to like promise myself or like promise God that I will eat, and just try to force myself to eat when I don't feel like it, or is trying that too easy and won't work.

GryffinSong said:

I don't think the problem is whether you eat, or how often you eat. I think the problem is an unhealthy focus on food. And if you have to force yourself to eat, that's just as unhealthy, perhaps, as anything else. You see, I think "normal" people eat when they're hungry, and they eat until they're no longer hungry. It's not such a big deal to them. If you have to promise god or yourself, and then force yourself to eat, there's still some underlying issue that's making this such a big deal.

At least that's the way it seems to me?

Click to expand...

ark_angel said:

I would have to say that just promising isn't going to do anything. I've tried it myself, while it may work for a short while, in the end it crashes down beneath you. I've heard other people that have had the same problem as well. The main reason it fails is because the food is not the issue, if you just promise to eat a certain amount and force yourself to do so, you aren't working on the underlying cause. Which is where counseling comes in handy. Cause without dealing with the true issue you are just waiting for it to re-emerge and cause you to go straight where you started again. Trust me, the sooner you get the help and fix that underlying cause, the better. You do have one thing going for you, it does seem that you know your main triggers. Because you said that it seems to be when you are depressed, and if you know what made you depressed you can then see the pattern of specific triggers to work on. Though that's not to say that you know all the triggers and there certainly can be a deeper issue that is unseen to your eyes. In any event, the best advice I can offer is to definitely seek some sort of help. Many pastors out there will see you for counseling, and usually don't charge anything. So if you were really worried about trying to get an actual counselor and having to ask your mom to get you to one, a pastor is just as qualified for counseling. Just a suggestion anyway.
I'm definitely here to listen if you ever want to PM me, and I'm certain there are many others here as well that are willing to support you. But in person support and someone to listen to you and help you through this will help you immensely.

Click to expand...

Oh okay thank you both, I will be praying about who to go to for counseling. Thank you both for helping me out and supporting me I really do appericate it I will be praying as well that this (my eating habits/lifestyle) doesn't get worse. Also that eventually I will be able to eat like I should.


Destiny

ark_angel said:

That's the spirit girl!! I will definitely also be praying that you will find the right person for counseling and that you will find the underlying causes and the way to get through this hard time. I have faith in you and I know God has faith in you.
Bravo btw for seeking the advice and the help. Being proactive is the key to beat this and keep anything from getting worse

Click to expand...

Thanks I truly appericate it very much Both of you have helped me out so much


Destiny