No leadership quality :(

eh7 · Aug 17, 2007

Hi,

I am pretty upset that I can't demonstrate any leadership quality.

Whether in church or at school or at work, there is a time to lead but because I don't have leadership quality, I always lose out in the end. I am not sure why I have this problem. How can I overcome this problem and step out to lead? Are there any skills or tips of being a leader that I need to know?

smile · Aug 17, 2007

What do you mean you can't demonstrate leadership qualities? Do you need to? If it's fear, just do it. The more you put yourself out there, the less you think about the fear. And get a mentor...

eh7 · Aug 17, 2007

smile said:
What do you mean you can't demonstrate leadership qualities? Do you need to? If it's fear, just do it. The more you put yourself out there, the less you think about the fear. And get a mentor...

Maybe I'm afraid of failure. I am not confident to lead... I just can't lead... I don't know.. :doh:

mrkram · Aug 17, 2007

"the prince" has some discussion that deals with leadership - you should give that a read and maybe that will help you out.

YahsAncientRestoration · Aug 17, 2007

The best advice i can give to be a leader is SERVE! Make yourself and your wants less that you can help out others. This was shown to me by example and its the best thing i think i ever learned. I'm being prepared to lead but not currently, but i know that when the time comes its about someone else more than me!

alfrodull · Aug 17, 2007

Not everyone is meant to lead. Otherwise, nobody would be there to be led. Everyone has different spiritual gifts, and yours may be suited to some other area.

I went through this a couple years ago. I was taking on all these projects, thinking you had to be in a leadership position to make a difference, and I ended up making myself miserable. Eventually I was led to the realization that it just wasn't my thing, and there wasn't any shame in that.

onajourney87 · Aug 17, 2007

eh7 said:
Maybe I'm afraid of failure. I am not confident to lead... I just can't lead... I don't know..

Two thoughts:
- Maybe you are trying to take on leadership tasks that are too big for your talents? I think everyone has leadership abilities, but some have a lot more than most of us.
- If it's fear you are facing, the only way to get past it is take a deap breath and jump for it.

Purity_over_Passion · Aug 17, 2007

eh7, bro not everyone has been created to lead.. if we where all to lead who would follow? Yeah leading might be a spotlight gift ailttle.. you get to stand on pontiums and platforms and everybody gets to see you. but i promise you without a shadow of doubt in my mind that you can change the world using the gifts God has blessed you with. Have you ever taken a spiritual gifts test? i can help you pinpoint where God has blessed you and will better equip you to us you gifts to change the you community and the world..

and if you really want to learn leadership and you feel you are that far behind.. check out TwentyfourSeven in Arkansas or Masters commision at IHOP in Missiouri.. Both of those programs are intense leadership school that will prepare you for life. i did two years of twentyfourseven.. it was absolutly amazing on so many levels

farmer2me · Aug 21, 2007

What everyone said above is totally valid and true, but here's one thing I learned. Being a leader is about learning how to be a follower.

If you want the truth, those who are good leaders know their followers. Jesus came to earth to learn the ways of His followers, so He could be a better God, so He could forgive us. If you go to work, the best leader is the one who cares about who you are. He knows you, because he's been in your position.

That's the foundation for any leadership quality. The rest will form in time!

Apollo Celestio · Aug 21, 2007

Where does one take this "test", i've been wondering for awhile what my "gift" is, I just hope I can use it to the extent the Lord wants me to.. I don't know if I can lead, I usually turn it down because i'm not much of a talker.

GodsoldierClintus · Aug 21, 2007

I disagree that everyone is not meant to lead. Just that everyone is meant to lead in different ways. Consider you yourself as a person, what are you good at? There are many different leadership qualities, and God will use what you've got. For example myself - I'm pretty introverted person and very emotional, and pretty indecisive. Hardly "leadership" qualities.

But with that I'm also very passionate about my God and other people. I just lead by being who I am, and speaking when I need to. In youth group my mate "leads" but I have learnt to interject by giving my opinion, and often just doing what I feel needs to be done.

Everyone is a leader, everyone has different strengths and points of view and that's why a team works - because between a lot of people all points are covered.

Don't lose heart and just lead with your strengths. I echo the sentiments of "Just Do It"

eh7 · Aug 23, 2007

Ishida said:
Where does one take this "test", i've been wondering for awhile what my "gift" is, I just hope I can use it to the extent the Lord wants me to.. I don't know if I can lead, I usually turn it down because i'm not much of a talker.

Me too.

alfrodull · Aug 23, 2007

Google "spiritual gift test" and you'll come up with a ton. Some of the ones I tried were limited in scope or contained gifts that I wouldn't necessarily call spiritual ones, but the questions they ask certainly got me thinking about my strengths and weaknesses in a way I wouldn't have otherwise.

Teufelhund · Aug 24, 2007

Everybody can lead, you just have your own style. Own of the big things when you are in a leadership position is to be decisive, never ever appear like you don't know what you're doing, or why you're doing it, it is more important to appear confident than to be confident. Always be decisive it almost better to make the wrong decision than no decision at all, you can repair the wrong decision, you cannot fix nothing. That's pretty much the sum of my advice.

eh7 · Aug 25, 2007

I feel that one of the problems is that I can't manage people. I don't know why...

handmaiden97 · Aug 25, 2007

Everyone leads in one way or another.

As far as managing people what do you mean?

I have a brother who is an extremly strong leader. He tends to make a descion and express it expectign people to follow him on it. For him this type of leadership works well. At times I can gladly follow him, I trust his descions but other times I think he is too domineering

I never knew I could lead, and would always lean on my brothers to lead instead. I worked as a secretary for one of my brothers in a ministry setting. After three years of working under him I ended up takign over for a couple of year while he pursued an dengagment and marriage. I tried to lead just like he did. but it wasnt me, I felt uncomfertable and unable to do it. then my other brother challenged me to make the ministry my own, to find my gifts and operate in them.

So I did, istead of telling people what to do, I asked them what they thought we should do. When I needed someone to take responsibilitiy of a certain activity, I asked for their input and advice eventyally asking them if they had the heart to run with it and then I supported them in it. I lead that ministry for two years, but I did so by serving

eh7 · Aug 26, 2007

People under you will be expecting you to make decision. so if I keep on asking them what they want, it seems like i am incompetent.

Yup, one of my weakness is I can't make a group decision. I would be better at making decision for my own bu I am afraid to make a decision as a team. I don't know why I have this fear...

handmaiden97 said:
Everyone leads in one way or another.

As far as managing people what do you mean?

I have a brother who is an extremly strong leader. He tends to make a descion and express it expectign people to follow him on it. For him this type of leadership works well. At times I can gladly follow him, I trust his descions but other times I think he is too domineering

I never knew I could lead, and would always lean on my brothers to lead instead. I worked as a secretary for one of my brothers in a ministry setting. After three years of working under him I ended up takign over for a couple of year while he pursued an dengagment and marriage. I tried to lead just like he did. but it wasnt me, I felt uncomfertable and unable to do it. then my other brother challenged me to make the ministry my own, to find my gifts and operate in them.

So I did, istead of telling people what to do, I asked them what they thought we should do. When I needed someone to take responsibilitiy of a certain activity, I asked for their input and advice eventyally asking them if they had the heart to run with it and then I supported them in it. I lead that ministry for two years, but I did so by serving

Tuffguy · Aug 27, 2007

Hey man. Don't get down on yourself because you don't have it all. I have news for you. No one does. Some are just better pretenders then others.

Find what function you are good at and do it to the best of your ability. You will find that when you are comfortable and doing that function well, people then give you more responsibility and you 'grow' into other tasks that take you a little more out of your comfort zone.....which is a good thing.

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