~ THE INNER ROOM ~ A Place to Withdraw To - WELCOME! (please read the OP)

Wow!
That post kind of sums up where I am at - only about nine and a half years behind you!
I have been a Christian for twenty two years, but in the last six months God has been drawing me so much closer to Him,
and showing me how to live for Him in a real way.
I'm not there yet - but He has changed so much in me over the past few months, it is wonderful.
Romans 8 is one of my favourite chapters - there is so much in it that makes me want to praise God.
Cos He has done it all for us!!
All we have to do is trust Him!

Oops - this is getting longer than I intended.
Thank you for this thread - it is a real blessing already!!
God bless you

This is wonderful. I thank God for this thread

Thank you for this thread it is a great blessing.
Gods blessings be upon you

Shadowcat said:

Bondman thank you for the creation of this thread and Praise be to God for giving you the inspiration .

When it comes to praying aloud, I'm not embarrassed - in fact I find I tend to be more focused. Actually at the church I attend I'm on the roster every few weeks as one of the people who lead the intercessions. At the service (which is the traditional service at 7:30am) I attend, I'm the only one who isn't an ordained priest or deacon who leads the prayers. To do so is a privilege.

Allow me to share a bit of myself with you. I was born and raised in a Christian household with two wonderful parents (who celebrated their 34th wedding anniversary in January this year on Epiphany) whom I wouldn't trade for anything in the world. Being raised in a Christian household means there was never a time when I didn't know God. For the first 18 months of my life I attended the same church my parents grew up in. In December 1978 we moved to the church we currently attend. The ministries I am a part of are Liturgical Assistant (been an L.A. since May 1998), Reader (started when I was 10) & Intercessor (started when I was 13). Mum is involved in the ministry of music. Two Sundays a month she plays the organ for the 7:30am service (Easter this year was her 42nd anniversary since she started playing the organ at church). Dad is also a Liturgical Assistant - has been so for 34 years (May 8 was his anniversary). He sacrifices a lot of his time to help with the sound equipment making sure it works and setting up for special occasions. Mum & Dad also are involved in the ministry of reading the Scripture at Church.

Love
Rebecca

Click to expand...

Wow, dear one, this is all amazing! Like you said you've been 'brought up' in the church, and thus God has been part of your life kinda forever. My Beloved was also blessed with always knowing, from a very young age, that Jesus loved her! What a blessing. You guys sort of make me envious that it took me 18 years before I found Him! (or He found me!!) But it is different for everyone...

What a great point about praying aloud keeping you focussed! Same for me! And awake too... Oh, *grin* a picture just came into my head then of an older person in a church praying silently, head down - then going off to sleep in the middle of everything! *hehe - spose I shouldn't laugh about that!* (my sense of humour is always getting me into trouble!!!)

A 34th Anniversary is plumb wonderful! And your family all having responsibilities and ministry is so lovely. I think there are many here on CF who would called you very blessed! Thankyou so much for sharing, Rebecca!!! Cos I want so badly for The Inner Room to be a place where we share, and love each other, and pray, and, well... just be TOGETHER!

May you grow in love and wisdom and knowledge as you continue to walk with Jesus day by day!!!

- Bondman and his Beloved

May God bless you this weekend!

Hi. I like the new topic. The part about guilt especially. Because I feel guilty most of the time. Maybe because Im still recovering from depression. Please pray for me! Im kinda desperate. and tired of the feeling. Sometimes I even curse myself in my heart using foul words. I have some self hatred evidently. Yes I wanna be free of this. So pray with me. thank you.

blankgirl said:

Hi. I like the new topic. The part about guilt especially. Because I feel guilty most of the time. Maybe because Im still recovering from depression. Please pray for me! Im kinda desperate. and tired of the feeling. Sometimes I even curse myself in my heart using foul words. I have some self hatred evidently. Yes I wanna be free of this. So pray with me. thank you.

Click to expand...

Praying for you!


2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

Romans 8:1
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus

Romans 8:33-34
Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.

1 John 3:19-20
This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.



God loves you so very much.
He has died to take your sin away -"as far as the East is from the West"!!
Keep looking to Him and praising Him, and He will sort out the feelings!
God bless!

Hallo all pleasd to meet with likeminded Christians. see my next testimony post to save you the check up.><> ><>

Arguing your case. -------- Or intercession.
Page 128. ''The Tide Is Turning'' by Terry Virgo.
-------. Prayer is arguing your case. Look at the greatest pray-ers in the bible,they are arguing the case. '' Lord if this be so, what about this ?'' Abraham is a good example. He argues, ''Lord, if there are this many righteous will You save the city? Lord, if there are this many.?''
----------------Moses. He said , ''God, if I have found favour, if I have found grace, show me Your glory'' Arguing from one thing to the next. Do you argue your case before God? We need to pray, ''Lord You have promised, ''so that we plead the promises as our way to receive mighty answers. He is a covenant keeping God with whom we may dare to argue.''
---Nehemiah 1:8 said '' Remember the word which You commanded your servant Moses--------Lord you said it. It's not our idea.''
Etc etc

I quote this as an example to me, to put myself on the spot before witnesses I suppose.
That I might not only read this but put it into practise. It's never any good just to
read an inspired word or The Word & not to ''eat''it & digest it.
I have in my working life asked God into the work place claiming the work shop, class rooms & the office area, verbally. I found this strenthening & encouraging for my self.
Also you do not have to ''finish'' you prayer at a particular time but go about your day remembering that you didn't leave God where you left your prayer.

There are none so blind
than those who can-not see-----
I GREW up in a &#8220;normal &#8220; Christian home. Dad was always searching for God but maybe he didn't realise that was so. So I was high CofE, Plymouth Breathren & then nothing for a number of years. Until 1977-8.
I went to the Sunday school when I was very young which I think I liked. When I was older it was suggested that I join the Cub Scouts & later the Scouts. I was never very enthusiastic about things thought to be &#8220;good for me&#8221;. When I finally managed to get out of Scouts, &#8220;I had to do something&#8221; else equally beneficial. ???
CHOIR: Singing in Mum & Dad&#8217;s local, high C.of E. church. I can remember absorbing the sounds of voices united in the joy of singing. Anyway that&#8217;s how I heard it! That enjoyment in praise & worship has stayed with me. During those years I did many of the thing boys in their early teens did, most of it was seen normal &#8221;for that age&#8221;. :-[
PEOPLE didn&#8217;t see me as a bad person but I was heading nowhere. I couldn&#8217;t see the hand of God held out before me. The life I had became duller there was no challenge or self-satisfaction, nor had I formed any real friendships. This all seeped into my system slowly.
STILL a teenager I remember one evening (not the date) crying out to God for relief from my &#8220;life of little value&#8221;.
I knew I was a sinner, I believed I was not worthy of having my cries answered & how right I was!!
(I now know, however, that forgiveness is a free gift) ;D ;D ;D

I THANK God he arranged for me to meet in the forces a girl who agreed to marry me. A girl with similar values to my own & together we sought; over a period of time, for the answers to those seemingly unanswerable questions that all have asked at some time & about living the life that the Creator created us for (i.e. living in full relationship with Him!)
Many of the questions my wife asked of the rest of the family; particularly my Dad, I was able to listen in to. This was how God spoke to me before I gave in to Him. Mum & Dad, my sister & her family moved to Canada. (being led by God?? ) To a comunity setting.
( Point for sharing with others; especially in a group of non believers,
those that you are not directly speaking to will receive from God by the Holy Spirit because there doesn't seem to be a barrier ie personal ''attack'')
THE THICK shell of self-protection, built up over a period of 40 years, cracked in August 1978, 6,000 miles across land & sea, in a log cabin in Canada. On an End-time farm 50 miles from the Alaskan Highway. While the family were quietly chatting in the beautiful fading dusk, I felt as if my heart broke, &#8220;I give in&#8221; &#8211;with these words the mental aches & pains rolled off my shoulder as I gave myself into the hands of Jesus. Had I ever heard His voice before? :-[
NOW I could see where I had been bought back from. I now know that the obedience of Jesus to His Father saved me & in Him I now have someone more than just a friend, who I can implicitly trust in all situations. What a challenge, to give & not just receive & He only wants my &#8220;Self&#8221;. 8)
LIFE has been far from dull since He answered my cry of years ago. There is now a joy deep down inside that nothing can take away. It&#8217;s there in the good times & when I&#8217;m under pressure. The problems of life have not evaporated but life has a new meaning, a purpose, security, reality & promises to get even better. ;D
When I arrived back in the UK my uncle asked ''if I was speaking in tongues of filled with the Holy Spirit '' as I wasn't he said pray & ask it of God. i did that almost straight away & was filled for the first time & spoke in tongues.

--------- & I'm still learning how much He loves us, me & mine.
One important thing I learnt from living with another Christian is that you BOTH must have your own relationship with God. You can't live off of the Spirituality, God's blessing of your partner.
My eldest son said that if we had tried to 'sock the bible to him' he would have left home early in his older teens. Even though when we had a meeting in our house in those days he would leave when he heard us downstairs singing. He's now a Christian.
My youngest son's life has been & is being moulded by God. ;D
He knows that we pray for his family & their welfare. He acknowledges that he has been "well looked after", ;D particularly in the difficult times that they have been having over these past couple of years.
God's on his case as he was on mine. :

PLEASE accept this small part of my life&#8230;How God manoeuvred me into a living relationship with His Son, Jesus, & to where I could see that His hand was held out to me.
71 silversurfer

Criada said:

May God bless you this weekend!

Click to expand...

Thankyou, dear friend! And for you as well!!

Is it starting to warm up for you over there in 'the Old Country'?

blankgirl said:

Hi. I like the new topic. The part about guilt especially. Because I feel guilty most of the time. Maybe because Im still recovering from depression. Please pray for me! Im kinda desperate. and tired of the feeling. Sometimes I even curse myself in my heart using foul words. I have some self hatred evidently. Yes I wanna be free of this. So pray with me. thank you.

Click to expand...

Criada said:

Praying for you!


2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

Romans 8:1
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus

Romans 8:33-34
Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.

1 John 3:19-20
This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.



God loves you so very much.
He has died to take your sin away -"as far as the East is from the West"!!
Keep looking to Him and praising Him, and He will sort out the feelings!
God bless!

Click to expand...

Hey, girl! Depression can really mess with your head and your feelings and emotions. My Beloved had a really bad time with this about a decade ago. But she's out of it all now, and is fine. Trust God, dear one! Trust Him!!! He won't necessarily take you straight out of depression, but ask Him to help you to get hold of the great verses Criada wrote. That is, to be able to believe them, and see that they apply to YOU! Cos they do, y'know!! They are for you, and me, and all of us here.


Let's go through Criada's verses again:


First Verse

Because you are a Christian (you're 'in Christ') then what? YOU ARE MADE NEW! Who is new? You are!!! - because Jesus came into your life. Can you believe this? Well, has God ever lied to anyone?? NO, He has not! So is this true for you? YES!!! Just accept it - it really is that easy!


Second verse

God says here that He doesn't condemn you, so there's no guilt for any of us. He's not condemning you - so don't YOU go condemning yourself, okay! Soon as a thought of guilt comes in, speak this verse from Romans: "There is now NO condemnation!" Say it again and again and if you need to - to stop your mind from feeling the guilt. Then start singing some choruses or hymns. That will help too.

So... are you condemned for cursing yourself using foul words? Well, what does God say? - NO CONDEMNATION! So you're forgiven, right!! How many times will He forgive you? As many times as you sin, that's how many. Will He ever get tired of forgiving you? NO, never! Just say 'Sorry' to Him, and then say 'Thankyou Lord for forgiving me." That's it.


Third Verse

Same as the Second Verse. Jesus died for you so that ALL of your sin is now forgiven - forever! Is this true for you? YES! - just accept it. It will make you feel a whole lot better. All of your sin IS forgiven!!! It IS!


Last Verse

When your heart condemns you - and it does, doesn't it, then what should be do? God says to you, "Girl, you just rest in my Presence, okay!" So just let go, and rest. Give yourself time to get over the depression. Please don't fight and hassle. Relax. Because God is... where? Right there WITH you - always! Where does God live? - wherever YOU live, that's where!!! Can you get ever away from Him? NO. He's always there!

Hey, but what if you don't feel this? Well, here's what God's Word says, "I will never, never, ever forsake you and leave you by yourself, NEVER." Hebrews 13:5b. Just accept this. Don't struggle. Don't worry about your feelings. Just believe He's there, because He really IS there!


And we are praying for you. Doesn't matter what happens, you can come and tell us. We've all been through stuff like this! So we already understand, truly.

And love you and care about you.


- Bondman and the Team here in The Inner Room

Criada said:

Wow!
That post kind of sums up where I am at - only about nine and a half years behind you!
I have been a Christian for twenty two years, but in the last six months God has been drawing me so much closer to Him,
and showing me how to live for Him in a real way.
I'm not there yet - but He has changed so much in me over the past few months, it is wonderful.
Romans 8 is one of my favourite chapters - there is so much in it that makes me want to praise God.
Cos He has done it all for us!!
All we have to do is trust Him!

Oops - this is getting longer than I intended.
Thank you for this thread - it is a real blessing already!!
God bless you

Click to expand...

[Post Edited]

Well, I just can't tell you how very, very exciting your post is to me, Criada! Wow-ee!! (And you can write whatever you like, okay.)

I've just been reading some of your blog and I love your poem back in #4. Also noticed you used the word 'submit'. I must do a post on this, cos it's such a brilliant word!

Romans was always my favourite book in the NT - so powerful, and yes, Chapter 8 is quite amazing.

What's so wonderful about reading your post (and profile) is how you are making such progress in your spiritual life! Way to go!! God has really got hold of you, and you of Him. I call this a cooperation where you're doing your part - so that He can do His! And clearly this is working just great.


So glad you like the thread. Bless you, Criada! You're such a blessing here!! ((Hugs!))

- Bondman and Mrs B

good afternoon

Hello as first you are a new
Creation in Christ once you accept
Him as Savior & Lord and that
Your sins have been forgiven
Second, we will never be condemn in Christ
As long as we have Him in our hearts
Jesus justifies and forgives us and
Washes away our sin never to remember them
No more at all.
Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life
And nothing but the way, the truth, and the life!!

KarenJoy said:

This is wonderful. I thank God for this thread

Click to expand...

Thankyou SO much for the lovely feedback, KarenJoy!

I've been reading your blog and really appreciate what you've written (left a comment). You're right - the devil will fight us on every front, especially prayer and Scripture study. I will soon write a post - sparked off by Criada's post - about stopping the devil in his tracks. We're Overcomers in the Lamb - I'm blowed if I'm gonna let the evil one stop me from being all I should be in Jesus!

Bless you heaps!

- Bondman and his Lady

laterunner said:

Hallo all pleasd to meet with likeminded Christians. see my next testimony post to save you the check up.><> ><>

Arguing your case. -------- Or intercession.
Page 128. ''The Tide Is Turning'' by Terry Virgo.
-------. Prayer is arguing your case. Look at the greatest pray-ers in the bible,they are arguing the case. '' Lord if this be so, what about this ?'' Abraham is a good example. He argues, ''Lord, if there are this many righteous will You save the city? Lord, if there are this many.?''
----------------Moses. He said , ''God, if I have found favour, if I have found grace, show me Your glory'' Arguing from one thing to the next. Do you argue your case before God? We need to pray, ''Lord You have promised, ''so that we plead the promises as our way to receive mighty answers. He is a covenant keeping God with whom we may dare to argue.''
---Nehemiah 1:8 said '' Remember the word which You commanded your servant Moses--------Lord you said it. It's not our idea.''
Etc etc

I quote this as an example to me, to put myself on the spot before witnesses I suppose.
That I might not only read this but put it into practise. It's never any good just to
read an inspired word or The Word & not to ''eat''it & digest it.
I have in my working life asked God into the work place claiming the work shop, class rooms & the office area, verbally. I found this strenthening & encouraging for my self.
Also you do not have to ''finish'' you prayer at a particular time but go about your day remembering that you didn't leave God where you left your prayer.

Click to expand...

Laterunner, thankyou SO much for adding so much to The Inner Room by your two interesting posts!

It's always amazed me how those OT guys put their case to God. He is our Abba Father, our Dad, and we can bring our requests to Him with confidence, hey!

Yes, we DON'T have to end talking to the Lord with an Amen. Prayer is conversation with our Lord - I don't say Amen with I finish talking to my Beloved! And God never leaves us, as you said, or we Him. Not possible! - He lives IN us, always!!!

God bless you so greatly, laterunner, and your family too!

laterunner said:

There are none so blind
than those who can-not see-----
I GREW up in a “normal “ Christian home. Dad was always searching for God but maybe he didn't realise that was so. So I was high CofE, Plymouth Breathren & then nothing for a number of years. Until 1977-8.
I went to the Sunday school when I was very young which I think I liked. When I was older it was suggested that I join the Cub Scouts & later the Scouts. I was never very enthusiastic about things thought to be “good for me”. When I finally managed to get out of Scouts, “I had to do something” else equally beneficial. ???
CHOIR: Singing in Mum & Dad’s local, high C.of E. church. I can remember absorbing the sounds of voices united in the joy of singing. Anyway that’s how I heard it! That enjoyment in praise & worship has stayed with me. During those years I did many of the thing boys in their early teens did, most of it was seen normal ”for that age”. :-[
PEOPLE didn’t see me as a bad person but I was heading nowhere. I couldn’t see the hand of God held out before me. The life I had became duller there was no challenge or self-satisfaction, nor had I formed any real friendships. This all seeped into my system slowly.
STILL a teenager I remember one evening (not the date) crying out to God for relief from my “life of little value”.
I knew I was a sinner, I believed I was not worthy of having my cries answered & how right I was!!
(I now know, however, that forgiveness is a free gift) ;D ;D ;D

I THANK God he arranged for me to meet in the forces a girl who agreed to marry me. A girl with similar values to my own & together we sought; over a period of time, for the answers to those seemingly unanswerable questions that all have asked at some time & about living the life that the Creator created us for (i.e. living in full relationship with Him!)
Many of the questions my wife asked of the rest of the family; particularly my Dad, I was able to listen in to. This was how God spoke to me before I gave in to Him. Mum & Dad, my sister & her family moved to Canada. (being led by God?? ) To a comunity setting.
( Point for sharing with others; especially in a group of non believers,
those that you are not directly speaking to will receive from God by the Holy Spirit because there doesn't seem to be a barrier ie personal ''attack'')
THE THICK shell of self-protection, built up over a period of 40 years, cracked in August 1978, 6,000 miles across land & sea, in a log cabin in Canada. On an End-time farm 50 miles from the Alaskan Highway. While the family were quietly chatting in the beautiful fading dusk, I felt as if my heart broke, “I give in” –with these words the mental aches & pains rolled off my shoulder as I gave myself into the hands of Jesus. Had I ever heard His voice before? :-[
NOW I could see where I had been bought back from. I now know that the obedience of Jesus to His Father saved me & in Him I now have someone more than just a friend, who I can implicitly trust in all situations. What a challenge, to give & not just receive & He only wants my “Self”. 8)
LIFE has been far from dull since He answered my cry of years ago. There is now a joy deep down inside that nothing can take away. It’s there in the good times & when I’m under pressure. The problems of life have not evaporated but life has a new meaning, a purpose, security, reality & promises to get even better. ;D
When I arrived back in the UK my uncle asked ''if I was speaking in tongues of filled with the Holy Spirit '' as I wasn't he said pray & ask it of God. i did that almost straight away & was filled for the first time & spoke in tongues.

--------- & I'm still learning how much He loves us, me & mine.
One important thing I learnt from living with another Christian is that you BOTH must have your own relationship with God. You can't live off of the Spirituality, God's blessing of your partner.
My eldest son said that if we had tried to 'sock the bible to him' he would have left home early in his older teens. Even though when we had a meeting in our house in those days he would leave when he heard us downstairs singing. He's now a Christian.
My youngest son's life has been & is being moulded by God. ;D
He knows that we pray for his family & their welfare. He acknowledges that he has been "well looked after", ;D particularly in the difficult times that they have been having over these past couple of years.
God's on his case as he was on mine. :

PLEASE accept this small part of my life…How God manoeuvred me into a living relationship with His Son, Jesus, & to where I could see that His hand was held out to me.
71 silversurfer

Click to expand...

Wonderful testimony, 71 silversurfer/laterunner!! Some great points there. A real blessing you sharing it with us!


I am a bit 'miffed' that you're a couple of years older than me, putting you at the top of the pile - and so I'm 'demoted' to 2nd place! *joking*

Have a truly blessed Sunday!

- BM and Mrs BM

Hi. im hoping that i can get some more advice frm u all. thank u so much for making urselves so available to help me. today as we know is mother's day. happy mommys day to all mothers! there is however something i feel i need help for in relation to this 'mother' topic. my mom and i are very close. in fact, too close. i am going to be twenty this year, and she still insists that she be near me physically most of the time. for instance, when i stay up late to study, she sleeps in the couch near the place i study. or when i go to the room to study and stay up, she sleeps in the very room i study. or usually she tidies up my stuff. i mean shes doing all of this out of love, but there are times when it starts to bug me. i want my privacy, something i can call my own, yet i feel guilty for letting it bug me just because shes a loving mom. and im hoping that i can stay in a hostel when i go to uni, yet my mom insists that i stay with her. she seems to want to be with me wherever i go. someone help me out with this? i dont wanna dishonour her. i wanna love her the way Jesus does.

Bondman said:

Is it starting to warm up for you over there in 'the Old Country'?

Click to expand...

Depend on your definition of warm! lol
It's lovely here for May - however, last time I was in Oz, it felt like a heatwave to me and the locals were wearing coats and moaning about the cold!! It's all relative, I guess!

Bondman said:

[Post Edited]

Well, I just can't tell you how very, very exciting your post is to me, Criada! Wow-ee!! (And you can write whatever you like, okay.)

I've just been reading some of your blog and I love your poem back in #4. Also noticed you used the word 'submit'. I must do a post on this, cos it's such a brilliant word!

So glad you like the thread. Bless you, Criada! You're such a blessing here!! ((Hugs!))

- Bondman and Mrs B

Click to expand...

Thanks for the encouragement!

Yes - submission is something God has been teaching me about. And it is very exciting - as well as painful at times! But He is blessing me so much at the moment!! And it is all His free gift - I have done nothing - and can do nothing - to deserve it!

blankgirl said:

Hi. im hoping that i can get some more advice frm u all. thank u so much for making urselves so available to help me. today as we know is mother's day. happy mommys day to all mothers! there is however something i feel i need help for in relation to this 'mother' topic. my mom and i are very close. in fact, too close. i am going to be twenty this year, and she still insists that she be near me physically most of the time. for instance, when i stay up late to study, she sleeps in the couch near the place i study. or when i go to the room to study and stay up, she sleeps in the very room i study. or usually she tidies up my stuff. i mean shes doing all of this out of love, but there are times when it starts to bug me. i want my privacy, something i can call my own, yet i feel guilty for letting it bug me just because shes a loving mom. and im hoping that i can stay in a hostel when i go to uni, yet my mom insists that i stay with her. she seems to want to be with me wherever i go. someone help me out with this? i dont wanna dishonour her. i wanna love her the way Jesus does.

Click to expand...

This sounds hard - But your determination to do God's will is beautiful, and He will honour you for it.
Are you an only child?
I know it can be hard to accept that your baby is growing up - perhaps your mother needs to feel that you still need her. (MY eldest is only 13, but is already far too independant!)
However, what you have described doesn't seem normal. Does your mom have other interests and friends? It sounds very much as though you are the focus of her life.
Have you talked to her about it?
Or if you can't do that , is there a pastor or older person who your mother respects who could talk to both of you? It does sound as though she may need some help to cope with you growing up!
I'll pray for both of you.

God bless you.

Criada said:

This sounds hard - But your determination to do God's will is beautiful, and He will honour you for it.
Are you an only child?
I know it can be hard to accept that your baby is growing up - perhaps your mother needs to feel that you still need her. (MY eldest is only 13, but is already far too independant!)
However, what you have described doesn't seem normal. Does your mom have other interests and friends? It sounds very much as though you are the focus of her life.
Have you talked to her about it?
Or if you can't do that , is there a pastor or older person who your mother respects who could talk to both of you? It does sound as though she may need some help to cope with you growing up!
I'll pray for both of you.

God bless you.

Click to expand...

Yes, dear one, if it's just Mum and you, then she is showing that she needs you. Too much, it sounds like (sometimes called 'Mother smother' here in the West). Is she a committed Christian, bg? If so then the Lord can be her comfort and friend. And as Criada said she needs to get other friends - is there some reason, like health for example, that she cannot do that? And interests as well. Some hobbies that interest her and take up her time so she's not round you all the time.

It's a balancing act here. She needs you. But you need more independence. Parents can't, or shouldn't, try to keep children forever. In our society (America, UK, Australia, etc.) what you feel and want would be considered totally normal. I don't know Malaysian societal norms. Is it okay for you to want your freedom by age 19 or 20? On another forum, I had a Christian friend from the Philippines who was 22, had finished her degree, was working in a responsible position, yet went home and her (Christian) parents totally ran her life as if she was 15 and not an adult. I told her this was out of order - but then I don't know Filipino society norms either.

In any case, what's happening seems not reasonable, with something needing to be done about it. While waiting for your reply, I'm praying each day for you also.

Love in Jesus!

- Bondman and Mrs B


EDIT: As you've been through depression, is she staying close out of concern about that still, do you think? And if so, does she still need to, or are you confident you're far enough out of depression that all her attention is no longer necessary? In other words are the doctors happy with your progress and feeling you're fairly much over it, and in no danger?