Church Dresscode

SallyNow said:

What is better... that someone comes to church dressed a so-called sexy outfit, or one that doesn't come to church at all?

There are no hard-and-fast rules about what will be modest on all body types, attitudes, and personalities. Some people can show a lot of skin without being the least bit modest, and others can not.

Accept all into church, into the community. It is not our place to judge.

If a problem arises where there is a high population of people dressing too sexy, or too fancy, or too expensivly, then perhaps a fun fashion show could be arranged, or the ushers or volunteers could start demostrating dress which is still appropriate for society, community, weather, etc, and yet is comfortable and fun.

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there is a difference between "some not looking imodest".
And, if those who are "mature" in the Lord think more of themselves and their "rights" to dress in a certain way instead of their brothers, then there is a big problem.
It is NOT about our rights.
It's not about us at all!
This is a time to worship God, not our fellow man's bodies!

Piedpiper123 said:

What if they were nude? Is there no line to be drawn at all. Personally I think it would be silly to turn up nude but some others might be offended.

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Why did they show up nude? To create a scene, or because they are nudists who really believe in nudity as a lifestyle?

there is a difference between "some not looking imodest".
And, if those who are "mature" in the Lord think more of themselves and their "rights" to dress in a certain way instead of their brothers, then there is a big problem.
It is NOT about our rights.
It's not about us at all!
This is a time to worship God, not our fellow man's bodies!

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If we are there to worship, then why does it matter what others are wearing? They are honouring Him in their way, you in yours. Both are legal, neither way is dangerous.

If someone comes to church in order to distract, or to bring attention to themselves, that is pretty rude, yes. But how are we to know which it is without first getting to know them?

Piedpiper123 said:

What if they were nude? Is there no line to be drawn at all. Personally I think it would be silly to turn up nude but some others might be offended.

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IMO that would be perfectly fine and appropriate IF the church were in a nudist/naturalist community. Then everybody else would be nude too, and nobody would be distracted or offended by it. In fact, in such an environment, showing up clothed would be the distraction. I'm sure that situation exists somewhere in the world, since I know there are Christian nudists and even communities of them.

But like Paul said... 1 Corinthians 10:24
Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.

For myself, I prefer a "come as you are" casual church. People ought not to abuse that by dressing in a deliberately provocative way, but still, I'd rather have someone dressed like a tart than have them not be in church at all.

I personally feel that people should try to dress up a little bit or at least put on some good clothes for church. Also, people should dress modestly when coming to church but really they should dress modestly all the time.

My first job when I see someone at church dressed immodestly is to pray for them. Leave it up to God to deal with. Then I worry about keeping my eyes and my thought where they should be.

I frankly wouldn't care if my entire congregation showed up naked (well, I'd care! *shudder*). We don't have a dress code and have never had a problem with the way anyone was dressed. In fact, I can't think of a time in my entire life when I saw someone at a church I was attending that was immodest. I'm thinking maybe it's in the eyes of the beholder that the problem lies.

The unwritten rule at my church is "come as you are."

The issue of people attending church nude has been raised in this thread, but is that really an issue or simply a strawman? I've never heard of anyone outside of a nudist colony attending church naked, although I understand that in the early church baptisms were performed naked.

The problem of issues of modesty for women leaves one unanswered question: who decides what is modest? My grandmother felt that it was immodest for a woman to attend church without wearing a hat. That view is certainly supported by scripture. Where exactly do we draw the line?

I say let us exclude no one.

I see this issue as the same as any other "sin" issue: If a nonbeliever comes into church, our focus should be on leading him or her to Christ, even if he or she comes to church dressed like a prostitute or a stripper. What do we achieve if we convice him or her to change the way she dresses (quite literally the outside of cup), but don't help her to change who she is at the core (i.e., a child of God, follower of Christ). This is how I view our attitude towards all "sinners" that come into the church. Our focus should always be to introduce them to the gospel.

Now the question arises, why would this be a sin issue? I see it this way: it is just plain disrespectful (and unloving) to intentionally dress in a way that causes others to stumble. Men are very sexually visual, and it can be quite difficult for a man to resist temptation to lust when he sees an attractive woman dressed in an outfit that accentuates certain parts of her body. This is the very reason that certain types of outfits are designed the way they are. This doesn't excuse the man for lusting (there is no "she tempted me" defense), but it is a sinful attitude in a woman that wants a man to lust after her. And temperature is no excuse: often the difference between an outfit that is designed to encourage lust and one that is more modest is only a few centimeters of exposed flesh (e.g., neckline just below the cleavange or just above), and it would be the only loving thing to do to sacrfice those few centimeters to support your brothers in Chirst. (BTW, the roles of man and woman can be probably be reversed in the above discussion; women are not the only ones who encourage lust in their manner of dress).

As for the question of whether we should all wear suits to church. I can't find any passage of scripture that supports that notion, but I know a couple that seem to oppose it. For example, we should not show any sort of favor to well dressed persons (See Js. 2:1-4) Likewise women are commanded to dress modestly (i.e. not extravagently) (See 1 Tim 2:9-10). This seems to reflect the same theme as Jesus' criticism of the Pharisees that they focus on the outside, when inside they are full of greed and his command that we instead focus on the inside. (See Mt. 23:25-26). How we dress is not that important and should not be a focus of our worship. It is possible, however, that our desire to dress nice for the Lord will incease as our heart condition improves. But, I don't see that this is necessary for any reason.

We had fashion police in my fellowship. They couldn't do anything with me so they left. We even had "Fashionable Sunday" once as planned activity I showed up that day in shorts n tee and on my racing bike.

I try to at least be nice-casual. We're a "come as you are church" and some people have some pretty raggedy pants and t-shirts. I try to at least have on a polo and jeans. Sometimes when its really hot a polo and nice shorts.

SallyNow said:

If we are there to worship, then why does it matter what others are wearing? They are honouring Him in their way, you in yours. Both are legal, neither way is dangerous.

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perhaps not dangerous to a female, but if they are distracting the men and leading them to sin, then they indeed should be more careful about their attire.
it is NOT honouring to God to cause men to lust and sin.

If someone comes to church in order to distract, or to bring attention to themselves, that is pretty rude, yes. But how are we to know which it is without first getting to know them?

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I am not saying to be judgemental of those in the congregation.
but, yes, MANY women do dress in a manner to gain attention on a daily basis.
a church service is (or rather should be) about HIM not us.

TamiinKS said:

I'm thinking maybe it's in the eyes of the beholder that the problem lies.

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of course we have become de-sensitized by our culture.
when this is the case, we do not notice things as easily.

Archivist said:

The unwritten rule at my church is "come as you are."

The issue of people attending church nude has been raised in this thread, but is that really an issue or simply a strawman? I've never heard of anyone outside of a nudist colony attending church naked, although I understand that in the early church baptisms were performed naked.

The problem of issues of modesty for women leaves one unanswered question: who decides what is modest? My grandmother felt that it was immodest for a woman to attend church without wearing a hat. That view is certainly supported by scripture. Where exactly do we draw the line?

I say let us exclude no one.

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I don't believe that anyone is talking about exclusion, but respect.
Both for oneself as well as everyone around you.

and of course no one has the exact same picture of modesty.
I had some who thought my wedding dress was immodest (i didn't know whether to be appalled at the idea or laugh hystarically) and I am very careful.

But, if body parts which are supposed to be reserved for a spouse are hanging out...this should give one personal reason to pause and evaluate how you are dressing.

ig3L said:

Now the question arises, why would this be a sin issue? I see it this way: it is just plain disrespectful (and unloving) to intentionally dress in a way that causes others to stumble. Men are very sexually visual, and it can be quite difficult for a man to resist temptation to lust when he sees an attractive woman dressed in an outfit that accentuates certain parts of her body. This is the very reason that certain types of outfits are designed the way they are. This doesn't excuse the man for lusting (there is no "she tempted me" defense), but it is a sinful attitude in a woman that wants a man to lust after her.

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and thank you for the male perspective!

And temperature is no excuse

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goodness no.
one can live in a very hot climate and still be modest.
don't talk to me about heat and humidity.
I lived it, both in church and at work (in a restaurant) and managed to remain modest.

: often the difference between an outfit that is designed to encourage lust and one that is more modest is only a few centimeters of exposed flesh (e.g., neckline just below the cleavange or just above), and it would be the only loving thing to do to sacrfice those few centimeters to support your brothers in Chirst.

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bravo, and this is SO true!
and it is QUITE easy to take care of this should you desire! EVEN if you want to wear a "cute" shirt that is lower cut, that is why LAYERING was invented
Old Navy tanks are great for this btw

Digit said:

Heyho,

Something I have been thinking about since attending my new church. Because it's dead in the center of Melbourne here in Aus and it has a collage campus just off of one wing, it's got a very young crowd going there. However many of the girls seem to wear pretty showy clothes. Short dresses, tight tops and often quite a bit of makeup.

At first I didn't really think much of it, but then my fiance decided to make more of an effort to dress better, as did I and now I am wondering if it's appropriate dressing like so.

Any opinions, what's your dresscode? Do you think it matters? Do you find it distracting?

All the best,
Digit

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People have different concepts of 'church' so those of the more conservative dress persuassion cannot (and maybe should not) expect everyone to show up in the attire that they would expect.

My dresscode? Used to be formal, but in the 90s people started going casual.

Do I think it matters? It probably does to the Senior Citizens.....but not to God.

Do I find it distracting? If the worship service is sub par and the preaching is not interesting....then yes.

try having a large contingent of crustys attend your Church.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crust_punk
tulc(my Church can be quite...interesting!)

tulc said:

try having a large contingent of crustys attend your Church.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crust_punk
tulc(my Church can be quite...interesting!)

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what's your point?
different and immodest are two seperate and different things

what's your point?

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M'am I rarely have one.

different and immodest are two seperate and different things

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I am aware of that.
tulc(going back into the corner with his coffee) :o

MrsJoy said:

of course we have become de-sensitized by our culture.
when this is the case, we do not notice things as easily.

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We are not "desensitized" to our culture. We create our culture.

The standards of modesty and the meaning of clothing styles changes over time.

Wouldn't we rather see people at church than people turned away because their clothing was some arbitrary definition of immodest?