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The best way to use this list is to pick a few that work for you and write them onto a piece of paper that you will keep with you. Often during times when youll need to remember these, you might forget them
a list is handy!
Also, as each person is different, it needs to be understood that not every one will work for every person. If any of the ideas listed would be a trigger instead if you were to use it, skip that suggestion completely! (And feel free to add your own!)
(This is taken from Secret Scars: Uncovering and Understanding the Addiction of Self-Injury by V.J. Turner (2002))
Also, as each person is different, it needs to be understood that not every one will work for every person. If any of the ideas listed would be a trigger instead if you were to use it, skip that suggestion completely! (And feel free to add your own!)
- Reach out Call an understanding friend or someone you can trust.
- Find a safe place This place is somewhere that you choose where you absolutely refuse to have a destructive incident. This can be in a park, a room in your house or even a chair.
- Breathe Take three slow, deep breaths (count slowly to four while breathing in, six breathing out).
- Count slowly count to ten.
- Pray Pray to God for strength.
- Turn it over Turn your addiction, your will, your life over to the care of God.
- Ice bucket Immersing your hand in a bucket of ice can help. The shock of the cold will provide enough of a jolt without causing physical scarring. Holding on to an ice-cold can of drink works too, and its a lot more convenient.
- Cry Cry if you want to. If you can (and dont worry if you cant).
- Feel Acknowledge and feel your emotions, any emotions, instead of feeling numb.
- Write You can write in a journal, on paper, or on the computer. You may choose to write a letter or e-mail to a friend or write scattered words, poetry, or words to a song.
- Listen Listen to music or just to silence.
- Draw Draw your feelings, draw anything. Colors are good for emotional expression! Go and get a box of crayons and start drawing it will at least put you in a better mood. (Remember how much fun you had in kindergarten?).
- Use non-harmful alternatives Use non-toxic red marking pens to write on yourself (instead of cutting).
- Let it out Break sticks or throw a tennis ball against a wall hard. Let your frustration out on it instead.
- Love your pets Spend quality time with your cat, dog, or other pet. They will give you unconditional love
. - Eat something Eat something that you like and can get enthusiastic about, such as ice-cream or a healthy treat like fresh strawberries. (But remember to stay away from caffeine when emotionally escalated!).
- Add comfort Put on a soft, warm, comforting shirt or jacket. (Flannel or fleece are warm and snuggly).
- Help somebody else When was the last time you gave a homeless person some money? Bring food over to someone who is sick. Visit an elderly person who is alone; read to a blind child; volunteer at a hospital, AIDS hospice or homeless shelter. You can find numbers for all of these in your local telephone book or on the internet.
- Clean the house Vacuum and dust. Clean out your closet and give your old clothes to a charitable organization.
- Walk Take a walk outside, or around the block. The fresh air and sunshine will help.
- Physical exercise Sports, working out, walking, running, bike riding, etc. will give you energy and the endorphin release will do you good!
- Go shopping Keep in mind that window-shopping can be just as good and cheaper
. - Exercise your brain Do crossword puzzles or solve complex math problems.
- Focus Do some kind of focused, absorbing visual type of work or craft. Eg. kitting, embroidery or a jigsaw puzzle.
- Read Read a good book. Go to a library or bookstore and browse.
- Spend quality time with a child Read, play, draw, color have fun! Children are generally happy and light-hearted and enjoyable to be around.
- Go to a movie Go to a movie or watch a DVD (but make sure its not triggering or violent).
- Socialize Do some type of fun social activity with people you like (even if you dont feel like it at the time).
- Embrace religion Go to a church or similar where you can keep God as your focus.
- Go out into nature Go to the mountains, the beach or the woods. Look at the sunset, or look up at the stars in the sky at night. Take in the things around you.
- Walk away Remove yourself immediately from a negative situation. Walk away from a heated argument. Leave the party if people start using illegal drugs.
- Be productive Balance your checkbook, finish your homework, etc. The positive reinforcement or accomplishing something will help you feel better.
- Make a list Make a list such as Goals for my future or Things to look forward to.
- Do some writing exercises Think of some things to write about, or use the following:
- Negative beliefs and positive alternatives
- Gratitude
- Journaling/life writings
- Reasons to get better
- My goals and aspirations
- Controlling my anger
- How self-injury has harmed me
- My ideal day
- Things I like to do and things I look forward to
- Drive or ride Take a long, peaceful drive, or ride around on the subways, buses or trains.
- Go to an art gallery Visual stimuli can be very helpful.
- Improve your appearance Experiment with different looks. Get a hair cut or style it differently. Experiment with clothes and fashion.
- Relax take a nap.
- Have an attitude of gratitude Even if you dont feel grateful at the moment, start with the basics. Eg. I have a roof over my head; I have food on my table; I have two arms and two legs and can walk and can see. Dont add any buts to those sentences.
- Sing Sing out loud. The endorphin release will do you good.
- Dance Find somewhere with live music or dance in your own living room.
- Cook Cook or bake something you like, for yourself or for someone else.
- Look at photographs Look at photo albums or pictures of happy times youve had.
- Search the web Search the Internet for a fun topic that captures your interest. (Have you ever wanted to go to Egypt?)
- Take a shower or a bath This is a good way to relax and relieve tension.
(This is taken from Secret Scars: Uncovering and Understanding the Addiction of Self-Injury by V.J. Turner (2002))
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