Alcoholics and Addicts Discussion/Support Thread

I just came across this Forum in the past couple of days and realized what a God send it is for me. My story is that I became addicted to prescription pain medicine after haing a terrible accident that broke many bones and injured other parts of my body. I was going to Church but the drugs controlled every aspect of my being and I stopped going because of them. I am now so full of guilt at the things I have done and the hurt I have caused my family. I do not have a job, friends are lost, and many people feel that I am simply waiting to die. I love the Lord and this Forum has given me a fresh start!!! I have been "clean" for ten days now and with the grace of God, will continue to not use. I confessed my sins to the Lord and my family and now must make amends. I have extreme debt, many deceptions and lost time to try to recover for my and my familie's sake.

This is the first time that I have gone without for this long in five years and I was taking an unconceivable amount of my DOC. I got them from doctors and a family member (who didn't know the extent of my addiction) but never on the streets. I hid very well in fact so much so, I rarely left the house and became a prisoner of the drugs. I did seek professional help (unknown to my family) but I was not willing to go public with my illness and attend NA meetings. I live in a very small, rural town and know most everyone through my professional, previous job. The doctor also prescribed something called Suboxone but I found that trading one addiction for another was not for me. Suboxone is a very strong opiate and I could not trade it for the other even though it would have saved me thousands in the long run.

I simply begged God to forgive me of my sins and help me to get through this very terrible time in my life. He answered and now, even though it has only been ten days clean, I have some very powerful gifts. Gifts of financial nature, I am not wasting money I don't have on drugs, and the power of love and well being from my family.

Thank you all for sharing your testimonials and I will surely need them as I continue my sober journey. With Christ's Love, sincerely, jayonew

TheListener said:

Hi

I think it's time I can come out of the closet and let some fellow Christians in on a secret about me.

Click to expand...

Congratulations TheListener. Coming out of the closet can be such a benefit to others who are struggling with addiction issues. Shows we are not alone.



Hello and welcome, Jayone1.
Congratulations on your decision and 10 days being clean. NA and AA are programs based on the anonymity of its members and the ones who are at the meetings have already admitted to having a problem.

The funny thing about addiction is that we are the last to see and admit that we have a problem. Friends, family and neighbours are often aware of our little problem long before we are ourselves. Hopefully you will find the strength and humility to avail yourself of the help you will find at these meetings. In the meantime I pray that God strengthens your resolve to recover.

Are there any former cocaine abusers here? If so, I tried cocaine for the first time two months ago. Since then I've done it 5 times - often making rounds at parties to see if somebody is carrying some. I did a lot last night and i really scared myself. I started telling my friends to "help me keep control of myself." The funny thing is, in my "clear" state ofo mind, I really had a sense of falling. I was telling people to keep me in line because I knew I was already addicted. So I was afraid of the drug while on the drug. It felt horrible. My issue is, I work with the people who carry this stuff and it wouldn't exaclty be straightfwd to get away from these people. Has anybody dealt with their addictive issues via counceling without a complete lifestyle change? I ask because I am a musician. These drugs aren't exactly going to disapear - and I cannot leave the scene as this is what I do for a living. Is it possible to build mental self control to handle this issue? Does this make any sense at all?

All I know is I'm a new user, and I don't like it. I want to take care of this now before things get further out of control. Would anybody suggest NA at this early stage?

It really does feel awful to downward spiral for the first time in my life.

Thank you for any advice that may be shed on this.

crackerass123 said:

Are there any former cocaine abusers here? If so, I tried cocaine for the first time two months ago. Since then I've done it 5 times - often making rounds at parties to see if somebody is carrying some. I did a lot last night and i really scared myself. I started telling my friends to "help me keep control of myself." The funny thing is, in my "clear" state ofo mind, I really had a sense of falling. I was telling people to keep me in line because I knew I was already addicted. So I was afraid of the drug while on the drug. It felt horrible. My issue is, I work with the people who carry this stuff and it wouldn't exaclty be straightfwd to get away from these people. Has anybody dealt with their addictive issues via counceling without a complete lifestyle change? I ask because I am a musician. These drugs aren't exactly going to disapear - and I cannot leave the scene as this is what I do for a living. Is it possible to build mental self control to handle this issue? Does this make any sense at all?

All I know is I'm a new user, and I don't like it. I want to take care of this now before things get further out of control. Would anybody suggest NA at this early stage?

It really does feel awful to downward spiral for the first time in my life.

Thank you for any advice that may be shed on this.

Click to expand...

Hi,
My name is Sandy and I am a recovering cocaine/crack addict. I believe that going to a NA meeting is a great idea. While you are there maybe you could talk to someone at the meeting about what you are going through. You don't have to tell the people you work with about it unless you choose to. If you think that the cocaine is scaring you now just keep using it and it will definitely get worse. Cocaine will ruin your career and your life. I know, believe me. If you ever want to talk you could PM me anytime. I will be praying for you. May God bless you and grant you the strength to put this addiction to rest...
Sandy

Hi guys
Right i been through some awful things last few years. Was raped 4 times, 3 by the same guy, since i was 15. Am now 19. Neway thas not what i was going to talk about. The only way ive found of dealing with it is drinkin constantly. At work, home, just generally out and about. Im not really bad and im sure i could stop if i really tried but i dont want it 2 get any worse. Any help would be great.

mel
xxx

MelWright said:

Hi guys
The only way ive found of dealing with it is drinkin constantly. At work, home, just generally out and about. Im not really bad and im sure i could stop if i really tried but i dont want it 2 get any worse. Any help would be great.

mel
xxx

Click to expand...

Hi Mel and welcome to this section of the forum.

Shame, guilt and alcoholism are closely related and have some similar characteristics I find. They are all progressive maladies. That's to say that over time they always get worse not better unless they are dealt with in an appropriate way. Time is not always the great healer that some say it is because it was my observation that over the long haul, it required more and more alchol to help me forget. And the more I drank, the more I got into situations that I wanted to forget. Catch 22.

Perhaps you do have the ability to stop without too much trouble at this point but the question is do you want to? Please remember that as time goes on it will become increasingly difficult to stop without a major intervention. It is unfortunate but some of us have to go to hell and back before we're finally willing to admit that we are powerless to stop the thing that has caused so much havoc in our lives.

God bless.

I don't know either way if i want to stop, i don't want to get worse but it does help for a little while. I understand what your saying and i know ur right. If im going to stop i need to do it while i still can. Its just hard, if i don't drink im left with all the memories of whats happend and i can't deal with it. Im not angry anymore, theres no point staying angry it just kills you inside. Have you got any tips?

MelWright said:

Have you got any tips?

Click to expand...

Only tip I have is what worked for me:

The 12 Step recovery method. I did mine through AA but if that isn't suitable then you could also do them through something like Celebrate Recovery. They not only helped to deal with past shame and guilt but continue to help me in the present. There is another section that gets into them here on the board. http://www.christianforums.com/f702-12-steps.html

If it hadn't been for working those Steps into my life, I would have been dead a long time ago.

Thank you. I will have a look. I know i've got to make the effort now. I've not drunk 2night so maybe a good start. Although feel like cryin with stuff going round in my head!

I dont think im an Alcholic but I just had my taxes done today and was a little depressed and almost finished a big bottle of wine by myself. Is this a problem Im not sure but I dont drink like this all the time just after finding out all the money I have to pay to the IRS. WOW its not pretty.

hey 3,
wow! watch out....
it could lead to drinking for every problem you
have that bothers you.
Then guess what? yup....you become dependent on it
to ease that thought or the pain of havin to deal with life.

3rightsmakealeft said:

I dont think im an Alcholic but I just had my taxes done today and was a little depressed and almost finished a big bottle of wine by myself. Is this a problem Im not sure but I dont drink like this all the time just after finding out all the money I have to pay to the IRS. WOW its not pretty.

Click to expand...

Hi,
Was doing well, lasted few days without drinking. Last night I was completly slaughtered, cant remember a thing, got carried home and to bed by my friend. Back to square one again then. Just thought id update progress.

I am struggling with my belief at the moment. Im asking for help and support. It feels like hes jus gone away. I will keep trying. Please pray for me to find hime again.