My heart is heavy with a burden......

Status
Not open for further replies.

Quiet Storm

Back in Shepherd's arms
Aug 19, 2002
908
23
40
Howard University
Visit site
✟1,269.00
Faith
Christian
Well now that I have properly introduced myself, I feel the need to express the uncertainty that I'm sufferring. As I forewarned in my greeting, this may seem like a very childish problem to some, and I sincerely hope that it doesn't come off that way. All of my life, I have been in search of a significant other. There have been times to where I was literally desparate, but it always turned out that no one that I had feelings for would ever reciprocate. Some time over the summer, I came to an internal conclusion that God was saving/preparing me for someone who is deserving of me, and for a relationship that will actually be fruitful. Afterwards, I never really gave too much thought to it anymore, as it really didn't matter much to me, but a long story short, I think that I have finally found someone that I can actually have a future with, but with us living in the times that we're living in,, I often worry that persuing a relationship at this point would be pointless. It seems as if Jesus' second coming is closer than ever, and even if I do persue a relationship, the chances of getting married and having a family are slim to none, so why even bother? I feel very guilty because I've always wanted to have a loving wife and family, but it seems selfish for me to want Jesus to prolong His wait so that I can have a wife, children, etc. on this earth. This has been on my mind for some time and right now it is getting to the point of being a heavy burden on my heart. I am seriously considering talking to a pastor/minister about persuing a relationship with this young lady because of this worry. Could anyone offer words of advice/support?
 

ZiSunka

It means 'yellow dog'
Jan 16, 2002
17,005
284
✟38,767.00
Faith
Christian
And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." Genesis 2:18

Hey, it's not childish or anything to desire a significant other. God programmed that need into you, into all of us.

Jesus said this about marrying before his return:
"But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only. But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. Matthew 24:36-39

Notice that he did not condemn people who would be marrying in the last days, nor did he say not to marry, he simply said that he would be coming so suddenly and without warning that life would be going on as normal, including marrying. It's okay for you to marry your life-partner, even so close to his return!

Go, love, marry if you want. It's okay with God!
 
Upvote 0

Lizzi4Christ

I'm worth waiting for.
Feb 13, 2002
6,233
123
38
It doesn't matter... my home is Heaven!
✟8,050.00
Faith
Baptist
Marital Status
Engaged
Politics
US-Others
Welcome Quiet Storm!

Honestly, I have te same fears. I have a deep fear of never finding anyone who would want to spend their life with with me (basically due to the lack of self esteem). I also think a lot that I want Jesus to wait till He comes back, so I can fnd that someone and have a family. I tihnk it's a fear that most people have. But the way I see it, we have no idea when Christ is coming. It might be 50 seconds, but it also might be 50 years. We have no idea. I'm glad you have those concerns, as it's an important thing to think about, but you shouldn't let doubt and fear rule over your life (trust me, I have). If Christ comes 17 minutes after you have been married, still won't those 17 minutes be wonderful and worth it? So don't says that persuing your relationship is pointless, because you don't know that. You could be with this person for the next 50 years! :) That's my 2 cents.
 
Upvote 0

AnnMercy2

Goofball
Aug 18, 2002
3,916
52
45
North Carolina
Visit site
✟4,976.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Republican
I totally agree with the first two posts. I myself have spent almost all my life waiting for my lifemate. Right now I'm right down lonely (although not desperate :eek: I only want God's will in finding my lifemate) Anyways, I don't know when the Lord is coming and I don't intend to "shorten" my life by worring that the Lord is going to come just as my lifemate arrives. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did that. I want to live my life as the Lord sees fit and and no other way. I'm trying to accept that the Lord's timing in my life is not my own and let me tell ya that is hard for me to do. I want to experience being in Love now not later but I guess that is not the Lord's will right now. And if he should come before I find my lifemate then I know being in the Lord's presence can not compare to being in Love with anybody. I don't think once I'm in heaven I'm gonna care wether or not I found love on earth, I figure God has enough love for me to even compare to that. Sorry for rambling, I guess I needed to get some stuff out :sigh: but :D
 
Upvote 0

DaveKerwin

Represent the Most High
May 31, 2002
4,633
132
43
Detroit, MI
Visit site
✟21,031.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Originally posted by lambslove
And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." Genesis 2:18

Hey, it's not childish or anything to desire a significant other. God programmed that need into you, into all of us.

Jesus said this about marrying before his return:
"But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only. But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. Matthew 24:36-39

Notice that he did not condemn people who would be marrying in the last days, nor did he say not to marry, he simply said that he would be coming so suddenly and without warning that life would be going on as normal, including marrying. It's okay for you to marry your life-partner, even so close to his return!

Go, love, marry if you want. It's okay with God!

Great post!

I want to add a few things.

If you like this girl a lot, then go for it dude! You don't know when Christ will return, so live life to the fullest. If you think this girl will take away from you relationship with God, then say goodbye. But if you can avoid making her an idol, and glorify God more with her, then just go for it. Don't worry about this soo much, pray for wisdom. God will hear you and he will lead you.

Being a single man myself, I know the feeling. It is not good that man should be alone, that is why God made woman. I have told God that I want a wife, but I have also told him that I am ok if he doesn't give me one, ever. If it is his will that I serve alone, then so be it. If it is his will that I serve with a partner, then so be it. Your happiness, your service in the kingdom, your joy, your well being, cannot and should not be based on another human being, rather on Christ.
 
Upvote 0

JohnR7

Well-Known Member
Feb 9, 2002
25,258
209
Ohio
✟29,532.00
Faith
Pentecostal
Marital Status
Married
Have you ever heard a 4 year old child sing: "O how I love Jesus". If not, if you have never known the faith of a child, your really missing out on something. The Bible is very clear that: Children are a blessing from the Lord. But more on that later.

In 1998 I leased a new truck. The reason was, there was so much talk about how Jesus was going to return around the year 2000. I just turned that truck back in, and I bought one that I feel can easily last me for 10 years this time.

For me, the age of grace began at Pentacost. That took place somewhere around the year 30 ad. I believe the age of grace or the church age will last two day in God's timing or 2000 years in our timing. Based on this, I would expect Jesus to return sometime between the year 2020 and 2030.

He could return anyday. We should be packed up, prayed up, and ready to go up at any time. But He maynot come for another 20 years.

For a lot of different reasons, I went to the Philippines to find a wife. I highly recommend it. In fact, I am beginning to think that they should pass a law that no one is allowed to marry anyone from their culture or race. But then I think we should leave people alone to make their own decisions.

The Bible says that in Heaven, we will all be one in Jesus. People of all nations, toungues, tribes, cultures and so forth. We will all be one in Him, of one mind and one accord. I am getting a early start on Heaven by being in a marriage of people from two different races.

Of course you can only do that for a generation or two. If everyone were to do what I did, then very soon we would only have one race. I am not sure what my son is, sense he is a combination of Asian and American. My wife says it goes by culture and where your born. So he is an American.

Any Christian man who wants a wife and who makes a wage about the poverty level can easily go to the Philippines and find a good wife. The Filipino women prefer older men, but they hold Americans in very high regard. MANY of them belive that if an American were to be interested in them, than that is a sign that he is Gods will for them.

For a man who is looking for a wife and he has a fear of rejection, I say go to the Philippines and get a wife. It is very rare for a women there to reject a Christian American man. If she does she will have a very good reason, like she wants someone who is a member of her church or something like that.

Of course women are free to go there and find a husband also. But for some reason, that has just not become popular yet. I don't know why. Maybe it would require the women to be a little bit more agressive than women usually are, because she would have to travel over there.

Of course the Bible teaches it is better to remain single and married people will have some problems in the flesh that single people do not have. But I had a lot of problems with being single also. At least this way I have a companion, even a sister in the lord, as well as a romantic partner. So I have someone to work through those problems with. With the added bonus of someone who keeps my house clean :)

The reason to stay single is so you can devote your life to God and better serve Him. The second coming is not a reason to not get married. The Bible says they will be getting married and giving in marriage, right up 'tell Jesus comes. Also, fear of rejection is not a reason to stay single also. The Bible says, that perfect love casts out all fear. Thanks, JohnR7

http://community.webshots.com/user/expojohnr7

Check out my Filipino American Picnic Album on Webshots.
 
Upvote 0

E-beth

Senior Contributor
Feb 6, 2002
7,583
741
Ohio
Visit site
✟20,861.00
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Republican
I know exactly how you feel, Quiet Storm!

When I was in my college ages and beyond, I was trying to get pregnant. I used to pray that I would be blessed with a baby before Christ's return. Then last year when I did get pregnant, I prayed that God would allow me to lay eyes on my son just once before Christ came back.

I have learned that God wants us to be happy with our time on earth. We never know when we will enter the courts of heaven, so the time is ripe to follow God's plan for your life now. If He has sent this girl to be in your life, and it is His will for you to pursue a relationship, then there is no reason to delay following His will.

Blessings to you as your enter the new relationship. I hope all your dreams come true!
 
Upvote 0

Dewjunkie

Well-Known Member
Apr 1, 2002
1,100
5
49
Asheville, NC
Visit site
✟9,428.00
Faith
Christian
Quiet Storm:

If God has provided a woman to you suitable to spend your life with, it would be just as bad to not marry her.  God blesses us in many ways, and not accepting them, in my mind, is an affront to Him.  I think it would be pointless to spend the rest of your days worrying about the rest of your days.  I think you (and God) would be better served if you attack life, live it to the fullest, love those around you (including a mate) as much as you can and serve God with a happy heart.  You could waste 20 years worrying about whether or not tomorrow will come, or just accept that you have no way of knowing, and enjoy those 20 years, or 20 minutes, whichever, as much as God allows.   

 
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums
Status
Not open for further replies.