im not sure If you know what I'm going through, I mean its like a constant doubting. I am the type of person who likes to take things apart, look at evidence, figure out how things work. Like a gun, from the first time I shot one I was like "wow how does a gun work" "how does a bullet work" so I took apart a gun, and a bullet. Hows does a TV work? How about a computer? A phone? etc etc... Then you get to how does LIFE work, and it seems that I look for hard evidence, and hard evidence is something God can't show me, but its like I want to believe in him but I'm not sure If I do, I just don't know how to describe it. Is that satan inside me? The doubting I mean. Sometimes I think it is, and then I think no because satan doesnt exist. I am going through lots of confusion and sadness/emptiness.
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