Would I Have Confessed?
Awhile back, I lied that the wheel of my car had broken
and that I could not make it to work.
The next day the wheel of my car broke.
YH’SHWH LOVES me.
HE is paying attention to what I am doing
and on what I need discipline on.
____________
Thursday, 1 April 2004, my computer was not working properly
and no matter what I tried, I could not adjust it back to normal.
I ended up reformatting the main drive.
After it was completed,
I was checking the internet when a pop-up occurred
(I had not put in my pop-up program).
It was inappropriate contentographic and
I looked.
Afterwards, I was so ashamed,
but did not confess the "fruit" of my sin to anyone.
Friday, 2 April 2004, my wife wakes me up
and shows me some inappropriate contentographic photos that were on our computer.
She knows of my sin and, naturally, suspected me.
I am guilty.
Still, I did not confess the "fruit" of my sin and lied.
I don’t know how the photos got onto one of our hard drives,
but there they were.
I lied.
I was going crazy in my guiltiness.
"I am guilty" were the words that ran through my mind over and over!
I, finally, got up and told her
that I had looked at the photos on a inappropriate contentographic pop-up
and to please forgive me for lying about it.
____________
Now, 3 April 2004 (as I write this),
I thank my LORD GOD YH’SHWH for putting those photos
on that hard drive and letting me get caught in my sin.
I, truthfully, wonder whether I would have confessed my sin,
on my own.
____________
Thank YOU, my GOD YH’SHWH,
for not leaving me on my own strength
and IMPOSING YOURSELF in my LIFE that is YOURS.
LORD GOD YH’SHWH,
YOU have CREATED ME.
YOU FORMED and FASHIONED my body.
YOU have PLACED YOUR HOLY SPIRIT in this body.
YOU have GIVEN me YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW (YOUR DECREES),
to PLACE in my mind.
In moving in SUBMISSION to YOUR HOLY SPIRIT
and YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW
I move in ways that are GOOD and RIGHT in YOUR EYES.
Help me remember this SUBMISSION when I face my temptations.
My fancies and my passions too often tempt me
to submit to my own sin at the expense of my purpose;
to DO YOUR WILL.
YOUR WILL is my ETERNAL HAPPINESS
and yet I still pay attention to temptation.
I have dishonored YOU to the ONE I LOVE
and to those that hear this PRAYER.
I have degraded what YOU, in YOUR LOVE,
have GIVEN to me.
I have used my mind, my spirit, and my body
to "fruit" my sin instead of DOING YOUR WILL!
I have been sinful.
FORGIVE me, my HUSBAND, my GOD YH’SHWH.
Help me SUBMIT to YOUR HOLY SPIRIT
and to YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW
so that I may be able to throw away thoughts
and desires that tempt me to do wrong
and transgress/move against YOU.
CREATE in me a CLEAN HEART.
ONE like YOURS.
RENEW, in me, a STEADFAST/STAND FIRM SPIRIT
that will be WORTHY of ALL YOUR BLESSINGS.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of LOVE.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of LIFE.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of TRUTH.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of my very BEING.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of ME.
How dare I use me - for me.
FORGIVE ME
and let ME WALLOW in YOUR BLESSINGS, again.
Thank YOU for not letting me find out
whether I would have confessed my sin or not.
YOU are GOD.
YOU KNOW what YOU are DOING.
YOU are in CONTROL.
LOVE ME, YH’SHWH.
PASSOVER is SO REAL to me, right now.
LOVE, RICOEL
Awhile back, I lied that the wheel of my car had broken
and that I could not make it to work.
The next day the wheel of my car broke.
YH’SHWH LOVES me.
HE is paying attention to what I am doing
and on what I need discipline on.
____________
Thursday, 1 April 2004, my computer was not working properly
and no matter what I tried, I could not adjust it back to normal.
I ended up reformatting the main drive.
After it was completed,
I was checking the internet when a pop-up occurred
(I had not put in my pop-up program).
It was inappropriate contentographic and
I looked.
Afterwards, I was so ashamed,
but did not confess the "fruit" of my sin to anyone.
Friday, 2 April 2004, my wife wakes me up
and shows me some inappropriate contentographic photos that were on our computer.
She knows of my sin and, naturally, suspected me.
I am guilty.
Still, I did not confess the "fruit" of my sin and lied.
I don’t know how the photos got onto one of our hard drives,
but there they were.
I lied.
I was going crazy in my guiltiness.
"I am guilty" were the words that ran through my mind over and over!
I, finally, got up and told her
that I had looked at the photos on a inappropriate contentographic pop-up
and to please forgive me for lying about it.
____________
Now, 3 April 2004 (as I write this),
I thank my LORD GOD YH’SHWH for putting those photos
on that hard drive and letting me get caught in my sin.
I, truthfully, wonder whether I would have confessed my sin,
on my own.
____________
Thank YOU, my GOD YH’SHWH,
for not leaving me on my own strength
and IMPOSING YOURSELF in my LIFE that is YOURS.
LORD GOD YH’SHWH,
YOU have CREATED ME.
YOU FORMED and FASHIONED my body.
YOU have PLACED YOUR HOLY SPIRIT in this body.
YOU have GIVEN me YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW (YOUR DECREES),
to PLACE in my mind.
In moving in SUBMISSION to YOUR HOLY SPIRIT
and YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW
I move in ways that are GOOD and RIGHT in YOUR EYES.
Help me remember this SUBMISSION when I face my temptations.
My fancies and my passions too often tempt me
to submit to my own sin at the expense of my purpose;
to DO YOUR WILL.
YOUR WILL is my ETERNAL HAPPINESS
and yet I still pay attention to temptation.
I have dishonored YOU to the ONE I LOVE
and to those that hear this PRAYER.
I have degraded what YOU, in YOUR LOVE,
have GIVEN to me.
I have used my mind, my spirit, and my body
to "fruit" my sin instead of DOING YOUR WILL!
I have been sinful.
FORGIVE me, my HUSBAND, my GOD YH’SHWH.
Help me SUBMIT to YOUR HOLY SPIRIT
and to YOUR HOLY WORD/LAW
so that I may be able to throw away thoughts
and desires that tempt me to do wrong
and transgress/move against YOU.
CREATE in me a CLEAN HEART.
ONE like YOURS.
RENEW, in me, a STEADFAST/STAND FIRM SPIRIT
that will be WORTHY of ALL YOUR BLESSINGS.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of LOVE.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of LIFE.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of TRUTH.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of my very BEING.
YOU, YH’SHWH, are the SOURCE of ME.
How dare I use me - for me.
FORGIVE ME
and let ME WALLOW in YOUR BLESSINGS, again.
Thank YOU for not letting me find out
whether I would have confessed my sin or not.
YOU are GOD.
YOU KNOW what YOU are DOING.
YOU are in CONTROL.
LOVE ME, YH’SHWH.
PASSOVER is SO REAL to me, right now.
LOVE, RICOEL
