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bitterness

brokenxheart

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i cant say i was severly abused, but enough where i had bruises and scratches and bumps. it eventually stopped, but will i ever EVER be able to forgive?? i mean, i have soooo much bitterness in my heart and there have been so many times where i couldn't even look at my mom just because i filled with so much hatred towards her. i prayed and prayed hoping for a healthy relationship with her, but...it's still really bad. the physical abuse has stopped but the verbal abuse is definately there. i just sometimes wish i could scream and yell until my face turned blue, letting it all out. but will i EVER get the chance?? and will i EVEr stop being sooo angry towards her??
 
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Gracie710

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Are you away from your mom now?

You are never required to be in an abusive relationship once you are able to get out as an adult. You don't have to subject yourself to verbal abuse from anyone. It would be okay for you to remove yourself from your mom's life for a while in order to find some peace.

Only Jesus can heal the bitterness in your heart. You must go to him with all of your feelings and talk to Him and pour yourself out to Him.

I'm so sorry you had to endure what you did. I know it hurts. Sometimes it takes time to get over the bitterness, but you need to try because it can erode your insides and ruin your life if you don't.

Blessings.
 
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ANGELIQUEHOPES

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Sometimes I get thoughts like I could kill her........
But I'm choosing not to<-----I say as I styfle down the anger with in me.
I grew up in a home probably very much like yours. My Mom critisized and still does nearly everything about me. From the way I look to what I say, regardless of the subject matter. Untill November of 2001 ,when I was 16,my Mom physically hit me with her hands, objects like hangers, shoes, and belts.
It didn't happen everyday physically, but everyday I was the one to blame for her problems no matter how minute. Things are much different now. My Mom tells me it's the past get over it. So now I don't talk about it. My sister is really the only one who actually admits that the abuse was abuse. My brother denys that it was that bad---even though he was right there with me and my Dad was at work when most of it happened and his anger he pushes deep down inside untill she screams a whole lot. Then he rants on about her for hours. I didn't how much pain I was even in untill recently with the help of Jesus who is the light. I knew I was depressed, but couldn't find the root source. He has brought light to my bitterness towards what happened to me, but I'm not really sure how to deal with my anger either. I want to scream at her and call her names, but that will only be another thing to destroy my family. I know I need to get into counseling and talk about the past and learn how to deal. I'm definately with you in spirit. Here's my
e-mail adress if you want to talk angelique_plans@rock.com
 
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Theresasjourney

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Feeling bitterness is a natural part of our woundedness and a heavy load to bere that cares over into all out life interactions.
I'm not sure how old you are...
Pain/anger/bitterness go hand in hand...good healthy ways of dealing with these are journaling out your thoughts and feelings....writting your mom a letter..saying everything you want to say...but of coarse not giving it to her..unless you get input from a therapist...
Have any of you ever considered family counceling...sounds like your mom needs help...dysfunctional family dynamics can be very hard..but there is much help out there..one only need to look for it and risk reaching out. If your still living at home you have the right to seek help and move out..no one deserves to be abused in anyway.....
blessings...
 
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