I was married for 13 years. In the marriage stirred a quietness within my heart and soul wondering everytime I saw a happy couple, "What do they have that we don't? How do they feel when they hold hands, cuddle, and touch each other affectionately? What do they see in each other's eyes that allows them to overcome their differences?"
I felt like a starving child inside and lonely. My ex was my first love; first everything. My dating was VERY minimal prior to marriage. I have not officially started dating anyone now. I went out with a friend (K) the past 3 days. The first day we took a walk up to a water fall in the rain and thunderstorms, the second day we watched a movie, and the third day we spent looking at open houses' old victorian homes/lunch/fabric stores (for her mom).
What startles me the most is that the communication K an I had never came close to that of which my ex and I had. Second, when K touched me to wipe the rain from my head she did it affectionately, and it showed in her eyes. The looks she gives me feel genuine and free of alterior motives. It felt so different from what my ex and I had. Third, she conveyed her meanings completely and expressed her needs/desires. Fourth, she listened without being distracted by formulating a reponse in her head to counter what I was saying. I realize I'm a bit older now and able to pick up on these things, but I'm wondering why it was missing in my own marriage?
Do you think it could be my determination to not make the same mistakes again, or do you think it could have been incompatibility?
I felt like a starving child inside and lonely. My ex was my first love; first everything. My dating was VERY minimal prior to marriage. I have not officially started dating anyone now. I went out with a friend (K) the past 3 days. The first day we took a walk up to a water fall in the rain and thunderstorms, the second day we watched a movie, and the third day we spent looking at open houses' old victorian homes/lunch/fabric stores (for her mom).
What startles me the most is that the communication K an I had never came close to that of which my ex and I had. Second, when K touched me to wipe the rain from my head she did it affectionately, and it showed in her eyes. The looks she gives me feel genuine and free of alterior motives. It felt so different from what my ex and I had. Third, she conveyed her meanings completely and expressed her needs/desires. Fourth, she listened without being distracted by formulating a reponse in her head to counter what I was saying. I realize I'm a bit older now and able to pick up on these things, but I'm wondering why it was missing in my own marriage?
Do you think it could be my determination to not make the same mistakes again, or do you think it could have been incompatibility?