Worried about Heaven

Dear Beth,

Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners; of whom I am chief. Do you know who said those words? The blaspheming apostle Paul; the Christian-murdering apostle Paul!

The bible has very powerful answers to your doubts. They are NOT uncommon, and you CAN get over them:

There hath no temptation taken you but such as is COMMON to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make A WAY TO ESCAPE, that ye may be ABLE TO BEAR IT. 1 Cor 10:13

Your way of escape is to fully believe this: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. You have never hated your neighbor like Paul hated Christians. Yet God saved Paul as an example for us:

Howbeit for this cause I obtained mercy, that in me first Jesus Christ might show forth all longsuffering, FOR A PATTERN TO THEM WHICH SHOULD HEREAFTER BELIEVE ON HIM TO LIFE EVERLASTING. 1 Timothy 1:16

If you want more, see the outline "Jesus Loves Losers" here: http://www.letgodbetrue.com/Sermons/sermons.asp?year=02

James

If you feel bad about your sins and if you are afraid because of them, your not beyond hope yet.

psalm 51:17b
a broken and contrite heart,
O God, you will not despise.

But don't put too much stock in how you feel. Feelings of remorse and unworthyness do convey our sinful seperation from God, but emotions just like any perception can also give misconceptions.

Put your trust in what the scriptures say is true. If you have confessed your sin to God, then don't worry about how you feel but just have confidence that He will take care of you and fulfill his promises to you. But don't just stop there, seek God in prayer and always ask him to guide you and always trust that he does.

28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."



Also, If I could recomend a book, I'd say that CS Lewis's screwtape letters were very helpful to me in terms of assurance and living a confident christian piety. I'm far from sinless but I trust that God will lead me and help me to grow. You ask if anyone has had these doubts and I'll tell you that I have had them very much so, but I've learned to put them aside and just trust God to fulfill his promises.

Sometimes feelings of seperation from God do come back, but that is a time to trust God and continue in integrity. And know that that is a time for spiritual growth for you to put more effort into trusting God. Everyone experiences highs in lows in their faith and they both serve a purpose in our growth. This is evident in the lives of the psalmists. They frequently cry out for God to show himself and they often worry about feeling his absence, but (as far as I've observed) the psalmist always ends continuing to trust and praise God.

That's what I thought. But, I fear that I have more fear than sorrow. Does that make me even an even worse sinner -- I'm just worried about myself?

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eehhh.... I don't think it's significant. At any rate, your salvation does not depend upon your emotional state and whether it's right. It depends upon God and that you trust him to do as he promised for those who trust him. The psalm isn't an absolute. you don't have to have grief to repent. Just recognize that you are in the wrong and trust that God can make it right.

Keep in mind, David was grieving that he murdered and committed adultry here and he jsut lost his son. We don't all have baggage like that to be grieving.

The important thing is that you realize that you are not reight with God.

However, your doubts here can keep you down if you let them keep you from trusting God. Trust God inspite of your worries. Don't wait for good feelings to come upon you. Do what is right now, and that involves trusting God.

That's part of my problem, I have lost my trust in God. I get these thoughts in my head that say things like "What if the Bible isn't true?" or "What if people are wrong about Jesus?" I hate having these thoughts, they make my heart ache. I pray, but I'm afraid God doesn't hear me.

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Most things worth believing in are not without risk. No matter what you believe there is risk. You may be in a position in your life where absolute certainty is not possible.

Here are some things that can help though. First and most importantly, surround yourself with other people who love God and will pray with and for you. If the community you are with does not show a vibrant and active love for God, then you might want to move on. That may entail going to a church other than a Catholic church and it might not, but whatever the case is, don't let your vision be narrowed by a single denomination. Secondly, find out what God is doing in the world today. Look into and read the stories of missionaries. Also, take time to learn about the persecuted church. These people pay the ultimate price for following Jesus. They would not do so if God did not give back to them. It is not the case that they are just hoping for a better life. These people who see horrendous attrocities also see tremendous works of Grace in their lives. I would recomend a book by Richard Wurmbrand called tortured for Christ. It sounds like a depression fest but it is surprisingly uplifiting.

uThe reason I say this is that Christianity and knowledge both involve community. much of western epistemology (theory of knowledge) tends to be founded on what any individual with the right training can verify through his own efforts. Now this is the ideal but it really doesn't work in practice. Science is actually requires much faith and trust in other individuals. In fact, most people in the scientific community cannot verify what is going on elsewhere in the scientific community. Why? because to see what other scientists sees sometimes takes training that cannot be available to all other scientists simply because we can't all go to school for ever and get qualifying degrees in every branch and sub-field within science. Secondly, some of the research requires expensive equipement that only a handful of qualified specialists have access to.

Likewise, as a Christian, you should not depend just upon your own attempts at a relationship with God but you should learn what God is doing in other peoples lives. And recognize that not everything that can happen to one christian is going to happen to you. God lovesyou as an individual but at the same time, he interacts with some individuals for the benefit of the whole church and we need to trust each other (using scripture, reason, and tradition as a guide) to convey what God is doing for us and for the church. So God is not going to strike you blind until you do as he says and put yourself under the guidence of more mature christians that he has handpicked himself. But he did do that to the apostle Paul and you can benefit from his writing's. Jesus isn't going to visually appear to you on a wall, but many Christians who are persecuted for their faith and suffer in ways to this day even though it's unheard of in The united states have seen such manifestations. And some of them tell of this and we can benefit from it.

Just as a good scientist needs to keep up with the literature and is dependent upon others, so we christians need to stay in touch with what goes on with the church including that part of the church that is a most terrible manfestation of Christ crucified today.

that's all I have time for. I will pray for you.

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Ebeth...

I have had those same thoughts. In my situation, I finally realized that Jesus had forgiven me a long time ago. But I had not forgiven myself. Have you forgiven yourself?

I agree with all the other posts as well.

jessiegirl

eBeth,

At the risk of sounding judgemental, I'm going to talk to you the way I'd talk to a friend (or the way I was talked to when I had similar feelings).

First of all, I trust that you know Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and savior. If you don't, then you really just need to find a quiet place and talk to Him. You see, Jesus had this knack for making people feel at ease. Remember the woman at the well? She'd had many husbands and was living with a man who wasn't her husband, but Jesus didn't condemn her. She wasn't a Jew yet Jesus ministered peace to her. Jesus will confront you with the sin in your life and challenge you to change, but He won't condemn you. He says so in His word.

Now, if Jesus doesn't condemn, who does? Well, the answer is pretty obvious. That would be satan. In the Old Testament, it was satan who condemned Job, not God. Satan took everything Job had away, but because Job was faithful to God, his losses were repaid many times over. So I encourage you to be faithful to God.

The Bible says that the devil is like a lion, seeking whom he may devour. You must make sure that you don't put yourself in position to be devoured. The only way I know of to so this is to keep a daily time of prayer and meditation on God's word.

You didn't say whether you were in church or not, but I wish to offer some advice on this topic as well. If you're not in church, for whatever reason, I encourage you to get in church. Even one hour a week of church is better than nothing. If you absolutely cannot go, then I encourage you to find a televised ministry. I'm not encouraging you to send money to a televangelist, but I do encourage you to find at least one ministry that speaks to your heart. If you're in a church but feel unsatisfied or spiritually unfed, it may be that you have a need in your life that your current church simply cannot meet. God plants churches for various purposes, some to harbor those new to the faith, some to help heal the broken, some to help grow believers into spiritual maturaty. Don't be afraid to find a church where you feel like God can work in your life, if you don't have such a church already.

Lastly, I encourage you to recognize that all good things come from God. God doesn't tell bad things to His people. Jesus never told a lepor that he would die, He never told a sinner that he was beyond redemption. These feelings you have--these thoughts of hopelessness and despair--they came straight from the father of lies, the devil. Rebuke them. As you draw close to God, you will find the peace you're looking for.

hi, eBeth. I see you are online now. If you get this message, I was wondering if you have any kind of instant messenger on your computer?

If you don't mind, I would love to talk with you. It would just be easier than posting a message because if I'm talking to you live, of course, I can respond to specific thoughts you have.

I'm not a pastor, or a huge expert on theology or anything, I'm just 18 years old, lol, but I feel like God wants me to try and help you out here . . . so if you would like to talk with me, that would be cool.

Ebeth... I promise you if you forgive yourself, you will please God. And I am speaking from my own experience. I hated myself so badly for the sins I had committed, it was not feasible to me that God would love me. I figured He was totally disgusted with me.

I took a bible study class a year ago, and someone there said something that hit me so hard!

Ebeth...are you a mother? Doesn't really matter, it is how I related to this. This person compared Jesus loving us just the way we as mothers love our children. It changed my perspective. Because if one of my daughters had done something I considered very wrong...I would be disappointed. But... if my daughter came to me and said, "Mom, I am so sorry, will you please forgive me?", I would feel overwhelmed to forgive. But... what would make me sad is if I had forgiven my daughter, but she still continued to hate herself. Nothing would give me more joy than for her to forgive herself and move on in her life in happiness. We all make mistakes.

This is just an analogy with the mother/daughter thing. You could apply this to anyone you truly loved with all your heart.

You are forgiven in God's eyes. I'll be praying for you.

jessiegirl

jessiegirl: your right, you have to forgive yourself.

If you have faith in Jesus Christ and you have love for him and for the people around you, that is your ticket to Heaven. Jesus Christ has already forgiven you for your sins, cos thats how good he is!! But, you have to forgive yourself. Without forgiving yourself you can't get out of that cycle and start over. You have to forgive and forget your sins, with Jesus's help ofcoarse.