stuck between a rock and a hard place

Dear Hope,

I can't think of any advice right now, but I just want to pray for you.

Dear Father in Heaven,

Please protect this marriage. Please return this man's wife to him in total comittment to him and to you Oh Lord. Please give Hope wisdom in what to do. I pray for the whole situation Lord that you would bless Hope and provide what he needs for his family. Oh God it breaks my heart to read this story. Please watch over this family and let it be a blessing to you. Thank you. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Whatever you do, keep the lines of communication open. And keep praying!

Admittedly I don't have much experience in this area, but for whatever it's worth, here's my advise:

Focus on your relationship and don't directly confront her about the other guy. Confrontation might put her on the defensive and just lead to argueing and fighting. Talk to her about your relationship. Discuss why things have been rocky and what both of you can do to fix it.

Above all else, listen to God.

HopeSM said:

Well, anyway, I'm back and needing some advice.
Tonight I see my wife kissing another man. She get's in the car, and rushes home, before I can kiss her she brushes her teeth with her finger. Things have been rocky between us the last few weeks so I'm afraid if I confront her about it I'll lose her, but if I don't confront her about it, it'll continue and possibly lead to something else with that guy, and lose her. I've been praying everytime I feel bad and even when I feel blessed lately. I don't know what else to do. HELP!!!!

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I'm so sorry to hear what you had to go through, HopeSM. Pray and ask God to give you the wisdom. Enhance your relationship with your wife. Perhaps, you can take her away for a holiday (just both of you). It might help in your relationship.

Bless your heart. You need to talk to her, let her know how you feel and what you seen. You may also want to go and talk with your Pastor and get some needed advice from him. I am praying for you....

I will pray for you!May God bring you two back together again and bless your marriage!

well i cant say i have much experice with this issue but if you love her and can work things out by confrunting her then great but i think you need t ask yourself something if shes kissing another guy is she worth keeping and why? shes being unfaithfull to you and to your marraige...i will keep you in my prayers and pray for you and hope you get some light shone on ur delema but is this worth goin threw? good luck hun with everything but just ask urself that one question.

Approach her like Christ would, and Hosea seemed to have the same problem..

Maybe posting this one in Men's Corner would be a good idea, as you're bound to have some points of view from guys who have been there.

No matter what happens, seek the kingdom of God as the first thing in your life. Ask God what is going on and then listen closely to Him and His word about marriage. if Jesus is your first love and you seek His Kingdom, all things will eventually fall into place. Keep trusting and loving the Lord. I will lift you up to the Lord in prayer, too. God bless...

My brother...you NEED to talk to her...don't get angry, or she will too for sure...as hard as this may be...approach this in a calm, cool, and peaceful manner and have her sit down and tell her that you are a saddened by seeing her kiss another man and tell her how YOU feel...Use I and Me statements such as "I don't like it when you kiss someone else," "It hurts me when you leave the house without kissing me," "I really love you and don't want you to leave," etc. I pray that things work out for the best in your life dear brother...my love to you!

HopeSM,

OK, I'll come from a different point of view. I was the one who cheated on my first wife. Our marriage had been rocky for a long time, and this other woman supplied things for me (emotional at first) that I wasn't getting from my wife. It's not right, but it's what happened. My ex found out, and immediately confronted me about it. Unfortunately, at that point, I had gone too far with this mistress, and wasn't open minded enough to listen to her appeals and efforts to reconcile. I had given up.

I tell you this hoping that it makes you think about finding a way to talk to her about it. Don't attack her with it, but find a way to sit down, mention that you know, and ask her what needs to be done to prevent it from happening again. Hopefully, you'll catch it soon enough that you can fix it. If it is truly where you are supposed to be, god will provide the solution before she (or you) gives up. I know it's not easy, but if you just act like nothing is wrong, she won't know you are serious about working out whatever is between you two. Just my opinion, from the other side of the coin.





As a side note, my "mistress" and I stayed together, got married, and have since both become Christians and have asked for forgiveness for our relationship's immoral beginning. I'm not condoning it, but I am mentioning this to show that God can turn anything into good if you repent, ask Him and trust Him to.