Why Men Are Alone. The Ugly Truth Women Don't Want to Hear.

[timewerx]

No, not at all! I do not find "ripped" physiques attractive at all. I like male shapes that might be called linebacker, lumberjack, teddy bear, gentle giant. I dated a bodybuilder/wrestler in my youth, and while his muscle size was impressive, I didn't find that to be particularly thrilling. Strength is nice. I think most women like to feel safe and protected with their man by their side, like he could fling them away to safety and beat down an attacker with his bare fists. I know I do! The allure is just as much about his deep-seated, core beliefs and personality (protective, watchful, guarding, reliable towards those he loves) as it is about the physical attributes. I find it profoundly attractive anytime a man takes action on behalf of a woman he loves, to defend her honor, protect her heart, bind up her emotional wounds, cheer her when he notices she's feeling down. Super, super attractive. Feeling "safe" emotionally around a man is equally crucial to the whole shebang.

Hey, enjoy your lean, powerful muscles! I sure wish I could lift 4x my body weight, lol.

I see what you mean with lumberjack. It's the body you get when you built your muscles in the gym during youth and then stopped and then had a job or business that involves some heavy-lifting. It's not a ripped body but the fat is better distributed and cute and all. Totally get it!

Despite my strength, I don't look threatening at all so I'd still need a weapon for defense or deterrence. I prefer a gun or gun-type taser. In places where concealed guns are not allowed, I'll use a fully automatic air gun. There are multi-purpose air guns that are also designed for self-defense and can be as lethal as concealed firearm.

I don't use any self-defense weapon atm. I'm just by myself when I'm going out and I dress like a poor person or wearing camouflage and other drab-colored articles of clothing to fool people into thinking I'm a soldier or a firearm enthusiast. It really works as a deterrence.

I only weigh 118 lbs so I'm not lifting some ridiculously enormous weights. Professional power lifters do >6x their body weight, the heaviest have enough strength to lift a subcompact car.

It's one reason I skate for exercise to also improve my balance when I'm lifting heavy weights. Because of my little weight, I can lose balance easily when handling big weights. Skating has helped a lot.

 

[timewerx]

It is the food industry that is responsible for overweight Americans. Once I went to a baseball game in San Diego, California. I ordered a steak burrito thinking that the burrito would consist of a flour covering,lettice,tomatoes,and beef. But after I bit into the burrito, I discovered that it also had French Fries inside of the burrito, Why is there a need to put fries inside of a burrito? That is too much starch!

Sound very delicious!

Yes, it's the food industry that is at fault. Addictive ingredients and then the super aggressive ad campaign in all mediums.

Sure, it's making money, creating jobs but at the cost of corrupting people's health, even their DNA

 

[Sketcher]

It is the food industry that is responsible for overweight Americans. Once I went to a baseball game in San Diego, California. I ordered a steak burrito thinking that the burrito would consist of a flour covering,lettice,tomatoes,and beef. But after I bit into the burrito, I discovered that it also had French Fries inside of the burrito, Why is there a need to put fries inside of a burrito? That is too much starch!

I'll bet it was good though. And now I'm thinking of those pulled pork nacho helmets.

 

[High Fidelity]

The food industry may not help, but that doesn’t absolve us of responsibility for what we eat and drink.

We’re tempted by far more than food and are expected to show temperance and wisdom.

 

[timewerx]

We’re tempted by far more than food and are expected to show temperance and wisdom.

One thing we can do is avoid temptations. Block all the ads from your browser, reduce the frequency of your mall and grocery visits.

And somehow, make money less accessible or less convenient by some means. Put your spare money into investment for example so you can't just make withdrawals that easily. Do it right, you won't just be living healthier, you might even retire at a much younger age.

 

[TheLastGeek]

I see what you mean with lumberjack. It's the body you get when you built your muscles in the gym during youth and then stopped and then had a job or business that involves some heavy-lifting. It's not a ripped body but the fat is better distributed and cute and all. Totally get it!

Despite my strength, I don't look threatening at all so I'd still need a weapon for defense or deterrence. I prefer a gun or gun-type taser. In places where concealed guns are not allowed, I'll use a fully automatic air gun. There are multi-purpose air guns that are also designed for self-defense and can be as lethal as concealed firearm.

I don't use any self-defense weapon atm. I'm just by myself when I'm going out and I dress like a poor person or wearing camouflage and other drab-colored articles of clothing to fool people into thinking I'm a soldier or a firearm enthusiast. It really works as a deterrence.

I only weigh 118 lbs so I'm not lifting some ridiculously enormous weights. Professional power lifters do >6x their body weight, the heaviest have enough strength to lift a subcompact car.

It's one reason I skate for exercise to also improve my balance when I'm lifting heavy weights. Because of my little weight, I can lose balance easily when handling big weights. Skating has helped a lot.

You sound like you're well-acquainted with your body, your size, your abilities, and what works for you. That alone is more attractive than some tall, beefy guy who works out 10 hours a day because he's riddled with insecurity.

Keep up the good attitude!

 

[timewerx]

You sound like you're well-acquainted with your body, your size, your abilities, and what works for you. That alone is more attractive than some tall, beefy guy who works out 10 hours a day because he's riddled with insecurity.

Keep up the good attitude!

Thanks TLG. I do like my build. It's perfectly suited to my favorite outdoor activities (cycling, skating, running, and hiking).

I do it for health, survivability, and spiritual growth. Not for looks although it looks good anyway!

 

[TheLastGeek]

Thanks TLG. I do like my build. It's perfectly suited to my favorite outdoor activities (cycling, skating, running, and hiking).

I do it for health, survivability, and spiritual growth. Not for looks although it looks good anyway!

That is, quite literally, all that matters. Well done, you.

 

[ReesePiece23]

One thing we can do is avoid temptations. Block all the ads from your browser, reduce the frequency of your mall and grocery visits.

And somehow, make money less accessible or less convenient by some means. Put your spare money into investment for example so you can't just make withdrawals that easily. Do it right, you won't just be living healthier, you might even retire at a much younger age.

You don't want to lock yourself out of civilization - the ever-evolving food industry is a beautiful thing, you just need to exercise the holy discipline of moderation

To overindulge is a sin, but to deprive yourself is a sin in its own right. Be happy, enjoy life, and don't make yourself a slave to either side of the coin.

 

[timewerx]

You don't want to lock yourself out of civilization - the ever-evolving food industry is a beautiful thing, you just need to exercise the holy discipline of moderation

To overindulge is a sin, but to deprive yourself is a sin in its own right. Be happy, enjoy life, and don't make yourself a slave to either side of the coin.

I drink beer and milkshakes with real sugar everyday. It's cheap indulgence for me. I make 1 bottle of beer last for 1 week. I mix it with the milkshake! Just no fastfood for me. I have indulged on them in the past and I know how very addictive they can be.

I also derive great enjoyment from cycling and skating. Cheap adrenaline rush and great exercise too. One time I had 1 bottle of beer before I skated and surprised it went better than usual. I never did it again so far.

Otherwise, I do my best to keep consistent and discipline in my eating, intermittent fasting, and exercise. It helps in spiritual growth and has therapeutic for me. I'd be real dumb (literally my brain) if I didn't do these things. It helps fill the gaps in my memory and helps me think faster (I'm slow of thought by default).

 

[tdidymas]

Us ladies want men to look good too.

This is why I never got a tatoo.

 

[bèlla]

This is why I never got a tatoo.

I don't understand the attraction to ink. For a time no one discussed it. But I've noticed pushback from the opposite sex on tattoos and odd hair colors. They believe it leads to further extremes in appearance (e.g. piercings, very short hair) and a loss of femininity. I don't know if that's true but the before and after images are startling.

~bella

 

[exitstageright]

I don't understand the attraction to ink. For a time no one discussed it. But I've noticed pushback from the opposite sex on tattoos and odd hair colors. They believe it leads to further extremes in appearance (e.g. piercings, very short hair) and a loss of femininity. I don't know if that's true but the before and after images are startling.

~bella

I was in the U.S. Navy for six years. And,I never got a tatto.I was a phlebotomist when I was in the Navy. Most of the guys that passed out or were scared of the neeldle had tattos. How ironic is that? Those tattos were applied by needles. Yet, these men were afraid of one little needle when they were getting their blood drawn.

 

[bèlla]

I was in the U.S. Navy for six years. And,I never got a tatto.I was a phlebotomist when I was in the Navy. Most of the guys that passed out or were scared of the neeldle had tattos. How ironic is that? Those tattos were applied by needles. Yet, these men were afraid of one little needle when they were getting their blood drawn.

I heard someone say years ago that the fall changed their appearance and they lost some of their spiritual qualities. They could still shape shift (appear as a man) but their appearance was changed. I don't know if that's correct but I remember when the culture shifted and tattoos were normalized and I always viewed it with suspicion.

~bella

 

[Sir Robbins]

I don't understand the attraction to ink. For a time no one discussed it. But I've noticed pushback from the opposite sex on tattoos and odd hair colors. They believe it leads to further extremes in appearance (e.g. piercings, very short hair) and a loss of femininity. I don't know if that's true but the before and after images are startling.

~bella

in general, the norm is that women covered with tattoos and piercings and odd hair colors are more on the liberal spectrum socially and politically and from a conservative standpoint, yes it is a turnoff. I have 2 tattoos myself and have met 2 women who had them but did not fit the description I just placed in the prior sentence. It can be a hit or miss but the public generally perceive women with tatts to be more sinful, liberal, nontraditional and so on

 

[timewerx]

in general, the norm is that women covered with tattoos and piercings and odd hair colors are more on the liberal spectrum socially and politically and from a conservative standpoint, yes it is a turnoff. I have 2 tattoos myself and have met 2 women who had them but did not fit the description I just placed in the prior sentence. It can be a hit or miss but the public generally perceive women with tatts to be more sinful, liberal, nontraditional and so on

Social media is pushing tattoo to become mainstream fad.

In such case having tattoos will mean differently and you'll be mistaken for the crowd that keeps chasing after fads.

 

[FireDragon76]

I don't understand the attraction to ink. For a time no one discussed it. But I've noticed pushback from the opposite sex on tattoos and odd hair colors. They believe it leads to further extremes in appearance (e.g. piercings, very short hair) and a loss of femininity. I don't know if that's true but the before and after images are startling.

~bella

I think the popularity of tattoos has to do with the rise of expressive individualism, particularly among those of lower social class. Tattoos still are skewed heavily by social class. If wealthier people have tattoos, they tend to be discrete and concealed from ordinary viewing.

 

[bèlla]

I think the popularity of tattoos has to do with the rise of expressive individualism, particularly among those of lower social class. Tattoos still are skewed heavily by social class. If wealthier people have tattoos, they tend to be discrete and concealed from ordinary viewing.

I've been following someone as of late who makes food content. She's adept in the kitchen and does the majority from scratch. She was swiftly given the trad wife label and termed a stay-at-home wife. Yet she's a runway model (as is her spouse) and it's evident by her presentation she isn't the norm. I don't know if we're unable to recognize expressive individualism or need put everyone in a box.

Creatively speaking I adore the theater. It's over the top and entertaining. But her depiction is more socially acceptable than not which is why I'm sharing it. Are we scrutinizing less desirables expressions unfairly?

~bella

 

[ThisIsMe123]

in general, the norm is that women covered with tattoos and piercings and odd hair colors are more on the liberal spectrum socially and politically and from a conservative standpoint, yes it is a turnoff. I have 2 tattoos myself and have met 2 women who had them but did not fit the description I just placed in the prior sentence. It can be a hit or miss but the public generally perceive women with tatts to be more sinful, liberal, nontraditional and so on

There used to be a time where ink on a woman was rather conservative, like a small cute snoopy tat on an ankle, a Christian woman I dated had a rose tat on her shoulder, nothing more.

Less is more with women actually.

But now, women have these long sleeve tats, ink just about covering their entire bodies. their entire back...I see it all the time in swimming areas. It's gross.

The local police on social media were showing off their sleeve tats, as if it were something to be proud of, and I was like , "Now it'll be hard to tell the difference between you and the prison population, lol!" (but I decided not to comment)

 

[bèlla]

Less is more with women actually.

But now, women have these long sleeve tats, ink just about covering their entire bodies. their entire back...I see it all the time in swimming areas. It's gross.

'Less is more' is probably what they're pushing against subconsciously. They don't want male influence on their appearance or attach what's expected to patriarchal beliefs. I can see the issue from both sides. I have jurisdiction over my appearance and should be able to do what I like with the understanding I must accept the consequences. On the other hand, I'm not oblivious to what appeals to the opposite sex and veering far outside the norm may lessen opportunities.

Beauty is a mindset and it's the same scale for everyone. The tattoo covered women you referenced is no different from the one I shared above. Both are expressions of individuality and extremes. The woman above is the hyperfeminine variation. She highlights her loveliness beyond the norm. But the expression is more acceptable to society and the male gaze.

The female ideal of attractiveness is more autonomous and accepting. The male ideal is less accommodating and visually appealing. Modern women permit more influences from the female ideal than previous generations. But there's a small spectrum within the whole that rejects its influence or minimizes its expression in deference to the norm (the male ideal).

Most women are advising one another and they're not conversing with women who understand the male ideal. They're talking to people who tell them what they want to hear or validate their ideas. That's why you see the things you do. But a woman who does would tell her the truth and discourage extremes that detract from her appearance and prospects.

~bella