That is helpful to know. I've read some of your earlier posts and some of the very specific scenarios that you had mentioned I too have experienced. How do you describe the difference between thinking a thought impulsively, and thinking it from your heart?
Compulsive thoughts come from wrong living inside, as well as outside of us, i found to be true. This is why we can never fully escape wrongful thoughts and we ought not to worry about them.
For we are sinners at heart and we live in a sinful world, so the dark forces ruling this planet attack people who care, like us, with dark thoughts and feelings, to captivate us in their nets, so they (the wicked,) can torture us relentlessly. It are the powers of the air we are fighting!
So to have bad thoughts does not make us bad, but rather show us that bad life is around trying to catch us with their lies and it is best to go to Jesus and let His loving truth protect us from them.
So i found that compulsive thoughts are best observed rather than believed. Thoughts are merely us trying to make sense of what is going on all around us, and do not necessarily reflex what lives in our hearts, but rather shows that the wicked are trying to conquer us though their lies. Trying to make us believe them, and us thinking them is us, and then to let their bad life into our hearts believing their hurtful lies.
For have you noticed how bad life gets when you believe those kind of thoughts? That is the trap of the wicked, the bible calls it the fowler's net, faith in God's love is what we need to escape such fate.
For i found that love for God, myself and other people lives in my heart, and that if my thoughts take off on me, accusing, threatening, oppressing, confusing, mocking, belittling, hating, me, that then it is best to go to Jesus in my heart to find the truth of my situation, rather than trying to work out my thoughts torturing me.
The moment i eat God's grace the battle is over. To have faith in Jesus' mercy even if we are guilty of wrongdoing is the only way to escape our captivity by the wicked.
i know that when i go back to love for God then i become calm inside and my racing thoughts begin to have less power over me instantly. The more i stay in love for God, the more God pours His love into me doing that, this is how i know it is the best way to fight O.C.D type thoughts and feelings.
i know now that whenever i fear, i'm stuck with thoughts in my mind, and i'm always being accused of wrong, and it always seems like Christ's sacrifice was not for me. Then i know that thanking Jesus for grace, and holding onto His graceful love will set me free from my anxiety, sooner or later. It is for me to go to my heart, to hold onto love for God with all i got, and stop heeding my mind scaring the living daylight out of me. i know such can be very hard to do. Yet so worth it. For fighting my intrusive thoughts this way, Jesus has conquered all my fears, and sets me more and more free in His loving truth.
So when we operate out of our heart we operate out of love for God, self and neighbour and let His loving truth shape our thoughts and feelings. When we feel anxious, accused, or wrong in any way it is for us to believe Jesus and thank Him for His sacrifice. i know the moment we trust His sacrifice for us, God's loving grace sets us free from our tormentors. This way our minds come to rest and His peace and well being can descend down upon us again.
So i say keep trying to live out of your loving heart, rather than your educated mind. For i know that the more we dwell in the love for God, self and neighbour, the freer we will be from those horrible thoughts we have all the time because of our mental illness.
Be of very good courage. Jesus paid your price in full!
Peace.
1 Peter 3:8-17
"
Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,
“Whoever would love life
and see good days
must keep their tongue from evil
and their lips from deceitful speech.
They must turn from evil and do good;
they must seek peace and pursue it.
For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous
and his ears are attentive to their prayer,
but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.
Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened. But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behaviour in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil."