Dating someone who isn't the same denomination

Jesusthekingofking

Well-Known Member
Jun 16, 2019
487
140
-
✟38,345.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Like the answer to almost everything: it depends. I dated a girl who was a Nazarene, though I was a Baptist. To make it worse, I was a Calvinist and she wasn't. We've been married running on ten years now. So it depends on the couple, imo. There are obviously things that have to be decided and agreed on, like, which church do you attend? We moved around the country and both are comfortable enough with our beliefs, so we've ended up taking turns attending churches that suit the other's theological convictions more. I don't recommend church swapping or anything, it just worked out that way for us due to moving around and based on the locations where we lived.

Also, so far, neither of us has really budged one way or the other theologically, nor do we expect the other to do so.
Calvinist and non Calvinist, what's the issue? As long as the sermon isn't lean on one side heavily it is OK.
 
Upvote 0

Jesusthekingofking

Well-Known Member
Jun 16, 2019
487
140
-
✟38,345.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
one of us grew up Lutheran & one Roman Catholic
we have had no problems whatsoever re faith

we have chosen to raise our child as a Christian
(but not Lutheran/RC)
So which church does your your children go to growing up? A baptist church nearby?
 
Upvote 0

Jesusthekingofking

Well-Known Member
Jun 16, 2019
487
140
-
✟38,345.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
My husband and I were married fifteen years before he shifted from his denomination to mine. I would say the key is that you have to both be truly respectful and willing to support and encourage your spouse in their walk, even if it's different to yours.
From which denomination to what denomination? If the gap is big eg. from non protestant to roman Catholic the shift is not easy.
 
Upvote 0

Paidiske

Clara bonam audax
Supporter
Apr 25, 2016
34,110
19,005
43
Albury, Australia
Visit site
✟1,473,143.00
Country
Australia
Faith
Anglican
Marital Status
Married
From which denomination to what denomination? If the gap is big eg. from non protestant to roman Catholic the shift is not easy.

Churches of Christ to Anglican. I guess that's not a very small gap.

But the point I was making is, I never expected him to shift. I was very willing to support him in his involvement in his previous church, and did for years. Likewise he has supported my involvement in my church, even to the extent of becoming a clergy spouse.

Ecumenical marriages don't work when one or both spouses disrespects or undermines the other in their faith commitment.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Darkhorse
Upvote 0

mama2one

Well-Known Member
Apr 8, 2018
9,161
10,089
U.S.A.
✟257,683.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
So which church does your your children go to growing up?

we attend more than one Christian church

child's in the online youth group started by one church when covid closed all churches in our area

she learned about the different types of prayer at last week's class
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Darkhorse
Upvote 0

Jesusthekingofking

Well-Known Member
Jun 16, 2019
487
140
-
✟38,345.00
Country
United States
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
Churches of Christ to Anglican. I guess that's not a very small gap.

But the point I was making is, I never expected him to shift. I was very willing to support him in his involvement in his previous church, and did for years. Likewise he has supported my involvement in my church, even to the extent of becoming a clergy spouse.

Ecumenical marriages don't work when one or both spouses disrespects or undermines the other in their faith commitment.
protestant to protestant, what's the biggest struggle?
 
Upvote 0

Paidiske

Clara bonam audax
Supporter
Apr 25, 2016
34,110
19,005
43
Albury, Australia
Visit site
✟1,473,143.00
Country
Australia
Faith
Anglican
Marital Status
Married
protestant to protestant, what's the biggest struggle?

I think there are two key areas. Infant baptism and the role of the clergy. In the Church of Christ, for example, laity can preside at communion; in the Anglican church, they cannot. And that reflects some very different underlying strands of ecclesiology and ministry.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: Darkhorse
Upvote 0

Silverback

Well-Known Member
Feb 13, 2019
1,306
853
61
South East
✟66,756.00
Country
United States
Faith
Lutheran
Marital Status
Married
Like the answer to almost everything: it depends. I dated a girl who was a Nazarene, though I was a Baptist. To make it worse, I was a Calvinist and she wasn't. We've been married running on ten years now. So it depends on the couple, imo. There are obviously things that have to be decided and agreed on, like, which church do you attend? We moved around the country and both are comfortable enough with our beliefs, so we've ended up taking turns attending churches that suit the other's theological convictions more. I don't recommend church swapping or anything, it just worked out that way for us due to moving around and based on the locations where we lived.

Also, so far, neither of us has really budged one way or the other theologically, nor do we expect the other to do so.

Children...which denomination would you choose for them? (If you have been so blessed, or in the future)
 
Upvote 0

Yekcidmij

Presbyterian, Polymath
Feb 18, 2002
10,445
1,448
East Coast
✟230,239.00
Country
United States
Faith
Presbyterian
Marital Status
Married
Politics
US-Others
Children...which denomination would you choose for them? (If you have been so blessed, or in the future)

Well, I suppose we think that the our church home is the best for the kids, otherwise I suppose we'd go to another.
 
Upvote 0

bbbbbbb

Well-Known Member
Jun 9, 2015
27,804
13,115
72
✟362,270.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Well, I suppose we think that the our church home is the best for the kids, otherwise I suppose we'd go to another.

Some folks, however, don't have many alternatives available so they end up choosing the least of the evils. For example, in a small town there might be a Catholic and a Baptist church. If one is a Missouri Synod Lutheran church member, that means either not attending either of the two churches or choosing between the liturgical church (Catholic) or a sola scriptura church (Baptist).
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Yekcidmij
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Jonaitis

Soli Deo Gloria
Jan 4, 2019
5,191
4,204
Wyoming
✟122,609.00
Country
United States
Faith
Protestant
Marital Status
Single
Politics
US-Libertarian
It would have an issue if a protestant date a roman Catholic Christian but is it fine for protestant from different protestant denomination to date each other? Like a marriage btw a baptist and anglican or a lutheran with a methodist?

I wouldn't see why not, for Protestants are in agreement with the essential doctrines that unite them. It seems to be the outsider who assumes that Protestant denominations don't get along at all, and that we see each other as heretics. This is false. Protestants are mutual in their learning from each other. However, I will say that Presbyterians prefer to marry/date other denominations similar to theirs in regard to certain doctrinal points, such as infant baptism.
 
Upvote 0

Strong in Him

Great is thy faithfulness
Supporter
Mar 4, 2005
27,773
7,918
NW England
✟1,041,469.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
It would have an issue if a protestant date a roman Catholic Christian but is it fine for protestant from different protestant denomination to date each other? Like a marriage btw a baptist and anglican or a lutheran with a methodist?

Of course.
Unless it's a problem for the two people involved.
 
Upvote 0

Strong in Him

Great is thy faithfulness
Supporter
Mar 4, 2005
27,773
7,918
NW England
✟1,041,469.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Sometimes it is not a problem for the individuals, but family members, especially parents, may object.

Which could be hard - but some parents might also object if their child is marrying someone of a different religion, colour or social class. When does it get to the point where someone marries to please themselves, not their parents?
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Paidiske
Upvote 0

bbbbbbb

Well-Known Member
Jun 9, 2015
27,804
13,115
72
✟362,270.00
Faith
Non-Denom
Which could be hard - but some parents might also object if their child is marrying someone of a different religion, colour or social class. When does it get to the point where someone marries to please themselves, not their parents?

It reaches that point where there are no consequences. In modern western society it has become standard for parents to abdicate on passing their values and beliefs to their children, leaving that to the education system, such as it is.
 
Upvote 0
This site stays free and accessible to all because of donations from people like you.
Consider making a one-time or monthly donation. We appreciate your support!
- Dan Doughty and Team Christian Forums

Marumorose

Active Member
Nov 30, 2019
329
321
45
Polokwane
✟37,738.00
Country
South Africa
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Single
It would have an issue if a protestant date a roman Catholic Christian but is it fine for protestant from different protestant denomination to date each other? Like a marriage btw a baptist and anglican or a lutheran with a methodist?
Genesis 2:24 says "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become ONE flesh. You cannot become one flesh if you go to different churches. There will be disagreements and conflicts because of different beliefs the churches have.
May God Bless you
 
Upvote 0

Strong in Him

Great is thy faithfulness
Supporter
Mar 4, 2005
27,773
7,918
NW England
✟1,041,469.00
Country
United Kingdom
Faith
Christian
Marital Status
Married
Genesis 2:24 says "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become ONE flesh. You cannot become one flesh if you go to different churches.

That's not true; my husband and I go to different churches.
I know of people who are married who are both ministers - in different denominations.

We all believe the same Gospel - any other differences are minor and not that important.
 
Upvote 0

Paidiske

Clara bonam audax
Supporter
Apr 25, 2016
34,110
19,005
43
Albury, Australia
Visit site
✟1,473,143.00
Country
Australia
Faith
Anglican
Marital Status
Married
You cannot become one flesh if you go to different churches. There will be disagreements and conflicts because of different beliefs the churches have.

Of course you can. If you can genuinely support and honour one another, it doesn't matter whether you're under the same church roof all the time.

In my experience there was extremely little disagreement or conflict because of different beliefs. Even the question of infant baptism was one we navigated with good grace towards one another.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Strong in Him
Upvote 0