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Blasphemous thoughts about the Holy Spirit

Job405

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So I was laying in bed trying to sleep and this demon put a partial thought into my brain about the Holy Spirit which I finished, most likely due to OCD about always finishing partial thoughts (this has been one source of many of my bad thoughts). The end result was a blasphemous thought that I did not mean.

Now I feel really bad and nervous that I may have blasphemed Him, but at the same time numb. And I love Him so much I do not want Him to depart from me. Why does this keep happening to me?!?! I'm sorry God please have mercy on me a sinner.
 

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So I was laying in bed trying to sleep and this demon put a partial thought into my brain about the Holy Spirit which I finished, most likely due to OCD about always finishing partial thoughts (this has been one source of many of my bad thoughts). The end result was a blasphemous thought that I did not mean.

Now I feel really bad and nervous that I may have blasphemed Him, but at the same time numb. And I love Him so much I do not want Him to depart from me. Why does this keep happening to me?!?! I'm sorry God please have mercy on me a sinner.
God really loves you and He knows that these thoughts are not yours. Jesus loves you and He is always with you. God bless you and Jesus is Lord.
 
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Amittai

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The human frame is language based, and (mental) verbal habits - as well as picture ones - are natural. A trick I tried was to tell my brain, "why can't you be wittier than that!" Eventually, it listened and I'm out of that groove now, and know when to take "phrases and sayings" or associations / connotations with a dose of good humour. What also helps is that I read about a wide range of subjects and love to fit concepts in unconventional combinations like Lego. I invent syllables to pronounce with or without etymologies. Can you remember bits of old poems that you can trot out? Thus, if the mind "slips" I get it doing what I'm doing all the time. Like drivers get out of skids or pilots out of a stall (if it's not a Boeing Max).
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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Fighting this right now it's absolutely horrible my mind curses the spirit 24/7 my mouth also wants to do the same with constant combating the thoughts with compulsions I have tried to do erp of which I'm still doing but it's the hardest thing ever it's like whether the OCD or whatever my feelings say that I love to think these thoughts which makes it worse it's like a drug addict addicted to a drug he wished he'd never been introduced to it's like my body or chemicals are addicted to thinking ungodly thoughts against the spirit thus making it even harder now to decipher whether it's me or not in the beginning I knew it wasn't me but it's time went on and they got worse and worse and my chemicals started changing in my feelings it sucks
 
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God is good

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Fighting this right now it's absolutely horrible my mind curses the spirit 24/7 my mouth also wants to do the same with constant combating the thoughts with compulsions I have tried to do erp of which I'm still doing but it's the hardest thing ever it's like whether the OCD or whatever my feelings say that I love to think these thoughts which makes it worse it's like a drug addict addicted to a drug he wished he'd never been introduced to it's like my body or chemicals are addicted to thinking ungodly thoughts against the spirit thus making it even harder now to decipher whether it's me or not in the beginning I knew it wasn't me but it's time went on and they got worse and worse and my chemicals started changing in my feelings it sucks
Please remember that God really loves you and Jesus knows your heart. Just relax and trust Jesus and you will be okay. God bless you and Jesus is Lord.
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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Please remember that God really loves you and Jesus knows your heart. Just relax and trust Jesus and you will be okay. God bless you and Jesus is Lord.
Amen.......it's just I can't get my mind off of it it's like my mind has become addicted to The fault it's like I purposely think them now out of habit the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that when the faults come or I also have intrusive speech that when it comes I don't feel happy afterwards I feel miserable but yet my body says I want them I don't know if you've ever fought intrusive speech meaning I will say my blasphemous thoughts under my breath but as in a compulsive manner of which I can't control I will try to cancel them out under my breath constantly want to say them out loud too it's a Non-Stop fight
 
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Job405

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Amen.......it's just I can't get my mind off of it it's like my mind has become addicted to The fault it's like I purposely think them now out of habit the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that when the faults come or I also have intrusive speech that when it comes I don't feel happy afterwards I feel miserable but yet my body says I want them I don't know if you've ever fought intrusive speech meaning I will say my blasphemous thoughts under my breath but as in a compulsive manner of which I can't control I will try to cancel them out under my breath constantly want to say them out loud too it's a Non-Stop fight
Yeah its a non-stop fight for me as well. The only rest I get is sleep and some moments here and there. I feel you.
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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Not only is my mind against God now but my feelings are against God and mostly the Holy Spirit although they're not mine but with the thoughts come feelings of enjoyment or that I want these thoughts when they're not there it's like I think them purposely just so they'll be there I guess I fought it for so long my mind is become addicted even feelings and then the thoughts come and obviously my depersonalization worsens afterwards and I have to hold on either I can sit or I can take an Ativan to help me it's a Non-Stop mental battle I hate feeling like I want a fault which increases them the more and makes new phrases every second come in my mind thoughts are one thing but feeling like you want them and trying to convince yourself you really don't when you feel so strongly you want them and you want them to be there mostly all against the Holy Spirit I've tried to do erp where I deliberately let it sit there and deliberately engage in the feelings of hatred that I feel and just let what come come........Don't know if you found any of that but I've been through this for years
 
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Job405

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Not only is my mind against God now but my feelings are against God and mostly the Holy Spirit although they're not mine but with the thoughts come feelings of enjoyment or that I want these thoughts when they're not there it's like I think them purposely just so they'll be there I guess I fought it for so long my mind is become addicted even feelings and then the thoughts come and obviously my depersonalization worsens afterwards and I have to hold on either I can sit or I can take an Ativan to help me it's a Non-Stop mental battle I hate feeling like I want a fault which increases them the more and makes new phrases every second come in my mind thoughts are one thing but feeling like you want them and trying to convince yourself you really don't when you feel so strongly you want them and you want them to be there mostly all against the Holy Spirit I've tried to do erp where I deliberately let it sit there and deliberately engage in the feelings of hatred that I feel and just let what come come........Don't know if you found any of that but I've been through this for years
For me its not just about the Holy Spirit but also about denying or rejecting God/Christ, worshipping satan, killing myself and so on.

I do sometimes think these thoughts on purpose (without meaning them), usually it happens very fast in the moment. I have this rebellious side to me which wants to test God and test His limits. I have trouble controlling it.

I want to try ERP to see if it works or not because right now I feel very lost and out of options. I have tried a lot of things to beat this but nothing has worked so far.
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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For me its not just about the Holy Spirit but also about denying or rejecting God/Christ, worshipping satan, killing myself and so on.

I do sometimes think these thoughts on purpose (without meaning them), usually it happens very fast in the moment. I have this rebellious side to me which wants to test God and test His limits. I have trouble controlling it.

I want to try ERP to see if it works or not because right now I feel very lost and out of options. I have tried a lot of things to beat this but nothing has worked so far.
My thoughts are 24/7 it's like I think them on purpose I've become consumed in them after years I'm consumed in it whereas before it was intrusive thoughts but now it's like they're my own thoughts I can't get away from them there's almost a part of me that wants it I don't know if that's my flesh but there's a part that wants to think this way the feelings that come with it feelings that state I want the fault I agree with them I love them and all the while after it's done I'm left bitter and angry and hopeless and frustrated and my thing is if I truly thought that way and I believed what I thought I would be happy and live my life joyfully this is coming from a seasoned Christian I didn't just get saved yesterday I love the Lord and I want him I don't know if you can relate.......now I've pretty much done what you would call erp just letting the thoughts be there when you have urges to think them just think I'm on purpose cuz the more you try to stop it or not think about it the more it comes I even have urges to speak them sometimes I will speak them under my breath but I will put a NOT ON THE END OF IT SO
 
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Mari17

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Not only is my mind against God now but my feelings are against God and mostly the Holy Spirit although they're not mine but with the thoughts come feelings of enjoyment or that I want these thoughts when they're not there it's like I think them purposely just so they'll be there I guess I fought it for so long my mind is become addicted even feelings and then the thoughts come and obviously my depersonalization worsens afterwards and I have to hold on either I can sit or I can take an Ativan to help me it's a Non-Stop mental battle I hate feeling like I want a fault which increases them the more and makes new phrases every second come in my mind thoughts are one thing but feeling like you want them and trying to convince yourself you really don't when you feel so strongly you want them and you want them to be there mostly all against the Holy Spirit I've tried to do erp where I deliberately let it sit there and deliberately engage in the feelings of hatred that I feel and just let what come come........Don't know if you found any of that but I've been through this for years
I think it's good that you're trying to do ERP! I don't necessarily feel like that means we have to purposely bring on the thoughts, but just that we recognize that, when we do get the thoughts, we don't really mean them deep down, no matter how much our OCD is trying to make us feel like we do; and therefore it's safe to ignore the thoughts instead of doing compulsions, even when our OCD is telling us that we have to do compulsions (that is, things like "cancelling out" the intrusive thoughts). I've forgotten, have you worked with a therapist on your OCD? It seems like your OCD is bad enough that having a professional would be really helpful.
 
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Job405

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I just had some evil thoughts from the enemy in my head calling the Holy Spirit something bad. Then I thought in my mind "Alright ... the Holy Spirit is God", but after I thought "Alright" I just felt something in my gut telling me that I was thinking something bad. I definitely did not and do not mean that He is anything bad, and of course God is good. I'm afraid I might have blasphemed Him in my thoughts. I definitely stumbled once again. Idk why I keep doing this but I did repent and ask for forgiveness immediately.
 
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Mari17

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I just had some evil thoughts from the enemy in my head calling the Holy Spirit something bad. Then I thought in my mind "Alright ... the Holy Spirit is God", but after I thought "Alright" I just felt something in my gut telling me that I was thinking something bad. I definitely did not and do not mean that He is anything bad, and of course God is good. I'm afraid I might have blasphemed Him in my thoughts. I definitely stumbled once again. Idk why I keep doing this but I did repent and ask for forgiveness immediately.
I think the reason you keep doing this is because you have OCD. It seems that you're still treating these thoughts as sin, when actually they're intrusive thoughts/feelings.

What are some ways that you can begin treating this as OCD?
 
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FixItJesus

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God knows these thoughts are not coming from you! The best thing you can do is just ignore these thoughts (if it's possible to ignore them.) I used to struggle with these thoughts, too. I still do sometimes. However, if you still love God, then there's no way you actually blasphemed The Holy Spirt because the Bible says that once a person does that, they'll never have forgiveness. That means your relationship with God would be totally over and the Holy Spirit would depart from you forever. It is impossible for a person to love God without the help of the Holy Spirit, so if you still love God, then you haven't blasphemed the Holy Spirit. If you truly are guilty of doing that sin, then you wouldn't care about God at all. So that's proof that you're not guilty of this. When the Pharisees in the Bible committed that sin, they didn't care at all. God bless you!! Please feel better!
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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Where I'm at at the moment is these thoughts are Non-Stop and constant but yet it's almost like I've learned to live with them as if they're just constant background noise because I fought them for so long and tried to ignore them and was so fear stricken by them that they literally became a habit and they're stuck in my head I think blasphemous thoughts constantly it's almost like my flesh has latched on to him and it constantly wants to think these negative thoughts it's very weird to explain I don't know if anybody understands call it mental illness a sickness OCD a demon what have you but I'm to the point now I don't know what my life is like without these thoughts it's almost as if if they're not there I purposely think them I've become obsessed and consumed in them but again I've learned to live my life with them it's like my bodies become addicted to them yes I prayed fasted salt the Lord took medical treatment talked to specialist and yet nothing I don't know why but yet I'm glad the fear has subsided it's one thing to have thoughts but to have thoughts and a Fe ar and panic of going insane is another thing I've literally become numb I hate I ever got obsessed and consumed in these blasphemous thoughts yes it's the whole idea of don't think of a pink elephant and it's all you think of and that's what happened with me as silly as it was I do not understand it it's as if the more I feared it the more I didn't want it the more I tried to pray against it the worse it got they'll finally my mind would blaspheme everything related to God I could literally hop in the shower and my mind would create a demonic thought against the Holy Spirit I could literally be using the restroom and my mind would conjure up some ungodly thought against the spirit I could put the car keys in my car to start it up and my mind would just start trying to conjure up something dirty it's as if my flesh was fighting against me but again I'm to the point I have learned to just live my life with this 24/7 constant blasphemy I'm to the point now I don't care if it ever leaves or not I'm used to it now
 
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zachariahjosephturner

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Anybody ever get strong thoughts and Urges to not only think but speak the thoughts out loud thoughts pertaining to you in your in voice asking the HS To perform and or do sexual acts to you........I hate this it’s kills me the only way to be free is die
 
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