Holy Spirit warned me and now He has gone?

JesusisLord7

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I've lived a pure life, set apart for Jesus. Born again at a young age and speaking in tongues and have never gone into the world and never will. Once I gave my life to Jesus, I never looked back and He set me free from sin and I grew so close to God and Holy Spirit. Extremely close. I got baptised at age 20 which was glorious and amazing. The next year I got attacked spiritually and thought I had lost salvation but God led me through that wilderness and I discovered that I am His chosen beloved child! I had not lost salvation. The 'I am who you say I am' Hillsong album was timely and came out when I needed it. It was very tough trial but God got me through it and I saw His hand on my life. He gave me many visions and comforted me.
From this trial, I developed a weakness in the mind of ocd thoughts that got in the way of my relationship with God. Holy Spirit cleared most of this up in 2019. But a few things happened in Dec that made the weakness come back and got worse. I started 2020 in a panic! I needed the whole world to pray for me!
So God was chasing me down and giving me signs that I am victorious and safe. Because I felt weaker due to the thoughts, I needed Him to fight for me and He did! How I felt made me think that Holy Spirit had left but He had not left me and never will leave me. The only reason I believed this is because of how close I had been to Him. However, I started to get signs and threats of Him leaving. Holy Spirit was warning me about hardening my heart about hell. I believed the lie that I was going to hell and that He had left. He told me not to be so hard on myself. By February this year on the 17th God's power came over me and I was in the tangible presence of God for over 30 minutes. It was my victory day!

I got a fresh baptism of the Holy Spirit on 17th Feb 2020. It was amazing and glorious. This did not last but I did get a victorious awakening on the 14th March 2020. Rainbows came out as a sign of God's true promise on the 21st and on the 22nd a candle of hope was lit worldwide. Also on this day Holy Spirit warned me saying, 'hell is illegal' warned of double doors and said 'you must trust', 'must trust'. He said it very clearly.

I still felt so vulnerable in the spirit realm and I ended up on the 26th March getting shot in the head by a demon. This was quite severe and sore. More shots happened and on the 29th March, I felt Holy Spirit's power leaving wave after wave. The power literally was sucked out of my body and it physically changed me. After that a spiritual drink was poured in by the enemy and left me empty and weightless. This was the double doors opening in the spirit I was warned about it. I lost what felt like a stone of spiritual weight. This was so serious and severe. I could not stop weeping and shouting out. My own spirit that was reborn got destroyed! Can you imagine the agony! I have been in agony since March 29th 2020. I cannot get in the presence of God, it seems impossible. No one understands what happened. They tell me just have faith He will never leave but it's too late!

Why did He leave me, was it because I was fearful and doubted too much? Or because the enemy had a legal right to come in and steal because of my fear? I was warned so many times but did not know how to escape! It does not seem fair at all. I am now dreading hell but I am young woman after God's own heart. I am surrounded by Christians but feel like a hypocrite now. My desire to pray, read the Bible or worship has gone because I can't do it without the Holy Spirit. It is a terrible situation since church was my life, God was my life and now I cannot have God, I do not want life. But if I die I do not want hell, though the separation I feel from God feels like hell already.
 

Jeshu

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Your story goes smack against the truths written in Romans 8:28-39

Please don't believe the lies with rob you of the Spirit of truth but believe the truth no matter what you feel or what your o.c.d is saying to you.

Stay in His truth and put your faith in His love that is the way to overcome the wicked attacking.

Not what you feel, for our feelings are fickle, but we know to be the truth. Hold onto the truth and the Spirit of truth will comfort you in His love over you.

Peace.
 
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Dave L

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I spent several years proving everything I'd been taught was wrong. I used to try to support my beliefs from scripture. But I learned to let scripture teach me what my beliefs should be. God is not the author of confusion so you need to ask if you are on the right track or not.
 
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Dave L

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Praying in the personal prayer language you have been given is the best, strongest, fastest way to stay and abide in the shadow of the Almighty that I know of. Without ceasing, keeping the mind "stayed on Him".
Scripture completely furnishes us since faith comes by hearing the word. Paul said tongues merely gave us partial knowledge.
 
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ss51

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Genesis begins with personal relationship, that was always His plan, and still is.
This "church age" is drawing to a close as He calls His own back to him in personal relationship.
Lean not on your own understanding but in all things acknowledge Him, and He will make your path straight", looks to be relationship, not stopping with reading his Book and relying on our own understanding.
The Heavenly Eden (Revelation 22:1-2)
 
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Dave L

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Jesus said his sheep know his voice, He didn't say His sheep read His Book.
Suit yourself. Just say'n scripture completely equips you. Tongues failed because they gave only partial knowledge. And if you don't think scripture is God's word. You'll not have any true faith because faith comes from hearing the word.
 
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Dave L

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Scripture completely furnishes us since faith comes by hearing the word. Paul said tongues merely gave us partial knowledge.
As I said in my OP, I had to prove all I'd been taught to be false so I could learn from scripture. Not just hunt proof texts for my false indoctrination.
 
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ss51

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He wouldn't have died to bring us this gift if He didn't want us to us it, He is a God of purpose, everything He does is with purpose.
The Scripture leads us to walk in the fullness of the gifts He has provided.
Jesus told us plainly many would have an outward form of godliness denying the power in these last days, but His Own would do greater works than he, and we are seeing that in these last of the last days.

People most often get the personal prayer language we are instructed to use confused with the public which I never see in my worship practice, Jesus isn't the one who confuses this, and there are only two kingdoms.
best wishes
 
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Tony B

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Born again at a young age and speaking in tongues

What makes you believe you were born again from a young age, and that the tongue that you utter is from God?

The reason why I ask this is not to question your personal integrity. But I've come across people in the past that claimed to have been born again, and after spending time with them found that they weren't. This knowledge is important to offering good advice.

Shalom, Tony
 
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Daniel9v9

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God has not abandoned you - Christ died on a cross and was raised to life three days later, that you too, in your baptism died and raised with Christ through faith. This is an objective reality outside of yourself, whether you feel it or not.

The voice of the Holy Spirit is found right in the Bible. They are not dead words that need to be unlocked by the Holy Spirit or by some mystical experience, but they are the true living words of God.

Any words that you receive from any source that pertains to your salvation - if they don't point you to Christ, you can disregard the words as false.
 
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Randy777

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I've lived a pure life, set apart for Jesus. Born again at a young age and speaking in tongues and have never gone into the world and never will. Once I gave my life to Jesus, I never looked back and He set me free from sin and I grew so close to God and Holy Spirit. Extremely close. I got baptised at age 20 which was glorious and amazing. The next year I got attacked spiritually and thought I had lost salvation but God led me through that wilderness and I discovered that I am His chosen beloved child! I had not lost salvation. The 'I am who you say I am' Hillsong album was timely and came out when I needed it. It was very tough trial but God got me through it and I saw His hand on my life. He gave me many visions and comforted me.
From this trial, I developed a weakness in the mind of ocd thoughts that got in the way of my relationship with God. Holy Spirit cleared most of this up in 2019. But a few things happened in Dec that made the weakness come back and got worse. I started 2020 in a panic! I needed the whole world to pray for me!
So God was chasing me down and giving me signs that I am victorious and safe. Because I felt weaker due to the thoughts, I needed Him to fight for me and He did! How I felt made me think that Holy Spirit had left but He had not left me and never will leave me. The only reason I believed this is because of how close I had been to Him. However, I started to get signs and threats of Him leaving. Holy Spirit was warning me about hardening my heart about hell. I believed the lie that I was going to hell and that He had left. He told me not to be so hard on myself. By February this year on the 17th God's power came over me and I was in the tangible presence of God for over 30 minutes. It was my victory day!

I got a fresh baptism of the Holy Spirit on 17th Feb 2020. It was amazing and glorious. This did not last but I did get a victorious awakening on the 14th March 2020. Rainbows came out as a sign of God's true promise on the 21st and on the 22nd a candle of hope was lit worldwide. Also on this day Holy Spirit warned me saying, 'hell is illegal' warned of double doors and said 'you must trust', 'must trust'. He said it very clearly.

I still felt so vulnerable in the spirit realm and I ended up on the 26th March getting shot in the head by a demon. This was quite severe and sore. More shots happened and on the 29th March, I felt Holy Spirit's power leaving wave after wave. The power literally was sucked out of my body and it physically changed me. After that a spiritual drink was poured in by the enemy and left me empty and weightless. This was the double doors opening in the spirit I was warned about it. I lost what felt like a stone of spiritual weight. This was so serious and severe. I could not stop weeping and shouting out. My own spirit that was reborn got destroyed! Can you imagine the agony! I have been in agony since March 29th 2020. I cannot get in the presence of God, it seems impossible. No one understands what happened. They tell me just have faith He will never leave but it's too late!

Why did He leave me, was it because I was fearful and doubted too much? Or because the enemy had a legal right to come in and steal because of my fear? I was warned so many times but did not know how to escape! It does not seem fair at all. I am now dreading hell but I am young woman after God's own heart. I am surrounded by Christians but feel like a hypocrite now. My desire to pray, read the Bible or worship has gone because I can't do it without the Holy Spirit. It is a terrible situation since church was my life, God was my life and now I cannot have God, I do not want life. But if I die I do not want hell, though the separation I feel from God feels like hell already.
If you feel some spirit is trying to put a wedge between you and Jesus and its from above its a lie. It is the Fathers will that Jesus raise us up on the last day.
All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away.
 
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Dave L

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He wouldn't have died to bring us this gift if He didn't want us to us it, He is a God of purpose, everything He does is with purpose.
The Scripture leads us to walk in the fullness of the gifts He has provided.
Jesus told us plainly many would have an outward form of godliness denying the power in these last days, but His Own would do greater works than he, and we are seeing that in these last of the last days.

People most often get the personal prayer language we are instructed to use confused with the public which I never see in my worship practice, Jesus isn't the one who confuses this, and there are only two kingdoms.
best wishes
Scripture replaced tongues and prophecy. Something I had to study to prove myself wrong.
 
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JesusisLord7

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What makes you believe you were born again from a young age, and that the tongue that you utter is from God?

The reason why I ask this is not to question your personal integrity. But I've come across people in the past that claimed to have been born again, and after spending time with them found that they weren't. This knowledge is important to offering good advice.

Shalom, Tony
I knew it in my heart. I definitely was a born again, Spirit filled Christian. The good fruits came out my life. Apart from Him, we can do nothing. The tongues was by faith and very powerful in my life.
 
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JesusisLord7

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Seems like you spend an awful lot of time believing a load of lies from the very father of lies.
Make a choice to believe what God says about you, not Satan.
That's true, I believed a load of lies and now I suffer.
 
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Bobber

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Why did He leave me, was it because I was fearful and doubted too much?

Your premise is wrong. He hasn't left you.

Would your natural parents leave you just because you've had a few struggles in life? If you then being evil know how to do good things for your children HOW MUCH MORE does your loving heavenly Father and Jesus want to show love to you. (based on Matt 7:11)
 
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