I have a friend, who is a christian, who struggles with gambling(poker machines)
I have never gambled. I wouldn't even know how to use a poker machine.
And yet, she holds me accountable when she gambles.
She will ask me to pray for her and I do pray for her. When she gets paid, this is when she is tempted, but, in my opinion, she gambles as a way of escape. She wants to gamble. I have never said that to her.
So, this is why she blames me.
She will call me to talk about a problem she is having. It might be, say, for example, the breakdown of her first marriage. So, naturally, in the conversation she will share what is hurting her and I will ask questions.
The next day she will contact me and tell me that she never slept because I was talking about her ex or asking questions. If, it happens to be around her pay time, she will get little sleep and then go and gamble.
She says, "You shouldn't ask me questions about my ex husband or broken marriage because it leads me to have little sleep and then I go and gamble to handle the pain/stress.
I told her that I ask her questions because she has come to me with the problem. In the past, I have had to stop contact with her because I hate being blamed for her gambling problem.
I now plan to not talk to her about her marriage breakdown or ask questions EVEN if she wants to talk about it.
Do you think this is a good idea?
I've told her in the past that she shouldn't blame me. She apologies but it continues.
Unless, I just listen to her problem and not say anything.
I am hurting over this. I don't feel I am to blame for her gambling addiction but I also don't want to say the wrong things to her
Any ideas, how to handle this situation better?
I have never gambled. I wouldn't even know how to use a poker machine.
And yet, she holds me accountable when she gambles.
She will ask me to pray for her and I do pray for her. When she gets paid, this is when she is tempted, but, in my opinion, she gambles as a way of escape. She wants to gamble. I have never said that to her.
So, this is why she blames me.
She will call me to talk about a problem she is having. It might be, say, for example, the breakdown of her first marriage. So, naturally, in the conversation she will share what is hurting her and I will ask questions.
The next day she will contact me and tell me that she never slept because I was talking about her ex or asking questions. If, it happens to be around her pay time, she will get little sleep and then go and gamble.
She says, "You shouldn't ask me questions about my ex husband or broken marriage because it leads me to have little sleep and then I go and gamble to handle the pain/stress.
I told her that I ask her questions because she has come to me with the problem. In the past, I have had to stop contact with her because I hate being blamed for her gambling problem.
I now plan to not talk to her about her marriage breakdown or ask questions EVEN if she wants to talk about it.
Do you think this is a good idea?
I've told her in the past that she shouldn't blame me. She apologies but it continues.
Unless, I just listen to her problem and not say anything.
I am hurting over this. I don't feel I am to blame for her gambling addiction but I also don't want to say the wrong things to her
Any ideas, how to handle this situation better?