Help on 1 Corinthians 7:10-11

[rtrulock]

“A wife must not separate from her husband” NIV.
In what ways does separate mean? Legally? Physically? Mental, emotional, romantic ? Financially?
I’ve been married for almost ten years now and I feel I have changed as a person over time, while my husband has not. I want to live differently and some of that is faith-based. I love my husband and do not want to get divorced at all but I feel like I need my own space. And I feel like I need more than just my own room. I am not trying to put my husband down here but the things I am tired of living with are his laziness and following me around the home like a child sometimes. I also know I need to take the speck out of my own eye first. I just need a change and am wondering if it is acceptable to live apart but stay married. I hope I’m not the only one who feels this way.

 

[ajcarey]

In my opinion if there is a definite issue with him which truly interferes with you being faithful to the Lord it could be right to live apart with the intent of resolving the issue; and then returning to live with each other when and if that issue is resolved. But if (like it sounds by what you said) you just find him annoying and he bothers you, then the part verse 1 in the Scripture below on "if any obey not the word" would apply to you directly now, as well as the surrounding truths which apply to all wives. Maybe just a few days vacation to seek the Lord alone would be the best thing for you in terms of the change you feel you need.

1 Peter 3:1-6: "Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement."

 

[SwordmanJr]

“A wife must not separate from her husband” NIV.
In what ways does separate mean? Legally? Physically? Mental, emotional, romantic ? Financially?
I’ve been married for almost ten years now and I feel I have changed as a person over time, while my husband has not. I want to live differently and some of that is faith-based. I love my husband and do not want to get divorced at all but I feel like I need my own space. And I feel like I need more than just my own room. I am not trying to put my husband down here but the things I am tired of living with are his laziness and following me around the home like a child sometimes. I also know I need to take the speck out of my own eye first. I just need a change and am wondering if it is acceptable to live apart but stay married. I hope I’m not the only one who feels this way.

Have you thought that maybe, with you being a believer, he follows you because he sees a light that he needs. You're looking upon the outward, but perhaps if you would look upon him as the Lord sees him by simply asking the Lord to see, then perhaps you will see as the man did upon the ramparts of the battlement walls. It is through prayer that Elijah was able to have done for that other with having his eyes opened to see beyond the physical.

Yes, the man should be the priest in the home, but some men simply are not yet where they should be. If that light within you ignites within your husband that fire, you will not be able to contain it. The Light of Christ Jesus outshines the sun. Be an ignition source, and you will see him erupt into a mighty man of God. He needs another man to come up along side him, and help him discover who he is, where he is, and where he needs to go. We all sometimes need someone to stand in the gap. Thinking about separation and such, well, that may be more selfishness than love. You have a heavy responsibility to love him in spite of it all.

And, please, don't fall into the trap of, "Well, you don't understand what I've gone through." There are so many who have suffered far greater, and came through it all better than they were before. Be strong. If you don't feel that power, then ask for it. Most have not because they ask not. Some have not, because when they ask, they do so with a heart attitude that is wrong. Stand, and then stand, and you will perhaps receive what you never thought possible.

Jr