It will take a miracle for me to find "Miss Right"

[vinsight4u]

video -deleted

 

[vinsight4u]

/nvm

 

[AdoptedPrince]

What kind of a dog do you have?

A shepherd mix. I'm not sure what she was mixed with, though. She has a curly tail like a whippet, so maybe that.

You have been to the Netherlands! That is where my great-grandpa arrived here from as a boy. Friesland is the province he came here from with his family by ship. The trunk is still in our family.

That's a great story about your great-grandfather! I was in Amsterdam. I call it the land of the super-models, since so many of the people I saw (male and female) were tall, thin, and beautiful. Hmmm. Maybe I shouldn't take a woman there... haha

 

[AdoptedPrince]

I shop here for free when I'm there! So do my guests!

Wow! I could get very fat there. haha

 

[vinsight4u]

deleted

 

[AdoptedPrince]

I'm trying to read and reply to your posts. Just want to let you know
that we've had an expected death in our family today, so I will be spending time with relatives soon that I've not seen for years.
Not the bakery side of the family. My dad's side of the family started here due to the Mayflower.

Hey, don't give this conversation a moment's thought. We're just making small talk here. Be with your family. I'm very sorry for your loss.

 

[vinsight4u]

May you find your dream lady!

 

[ProGoddess]

I hope you find the woman that you wanted.

 

[Rebecca4Christ]

Just know it's as hard or harder for us ladies of a certain age....so I can and do sympathize.

 

[Run to Jesus]

I don't either. We are attracted to what we are attracted to. I'm a little surprised that no one has attacked me yet for revealing what I am attracted to. That has happened plenty of times before in online discussions. Then I reply by pointing out that they have things they are attracted to (a guy with a job, for example) and not attracted to and the topic gets dropped fairly quickly.

For those of us still waiting on the very same miracle that you are waiting for, attacking you would be like attacking ourselves. We may even have similar lists to yours just a few lines could be changed. I wish I could say more than hang in there but I feel a bit overwhelmed. You alone know your walk with God and how you relate to him on the very topic. I am certain that He does reveal things to his children. I am sure that he can and will reveal that special lady to you at the right time. Maybe it is a question of geography. Ask God to bring her near.

Sorry kind of feel too young to be adding my two pence.

 

[blessedintrovert]

I would have to be knocked off my feet if I were to date.

 

[Lady Bug]

I don't know, it doesn't seem totally farfetched.

I hate when people say that we should lower our standards though. How would you feel if the person who chose you, lowered their standards in order to do so? Wouldn't you feel insulted?

 

[expos4ever]

About online dating: I have tried it and met some truly crazy women. Two would not be happy unless I drove a stake through the heart of my ex-wife. A third wept within 60 seconds of meeting me.

My anecdotal experience: there is a reason why (older) women are on these sites:

They have major problems.

Having said this, I expect women would have a similar complaint.

Now for the good news: while it appears to be true that the loony factor is higher online than in the general population, there HAVE to be SOME women out there who do not fall into the “I love you, now get into the freezer” category.

There have to be.

 

[bèlla]

I hate when people say that we should lower our standards though. How would you feel if the person who chose you, lowered their standards in order to do so? Wouldn't you feel insulted?

I came close to hearing the same recently on the site. The notion of altering what I’m seeking (which yielded two secular prospects) seems odd. They were not appropriate due to absence of belief and tolerance for my purpose. I have no difficulty meeting men who have the qualities I’m seeking.

The idea of making it easier for Christian men lends the suggestion they’re unable to measure up or are lesser in some way. That sounds more like charity than vetting a marriage partner.

 

[expos4ever]

On lowering standards: I understand the objection, but standards are often unrealistically high.

In the world of online dating at least, I believe there have been actual studies showing that the way online dating is setup causes people to apply wildly unreasonable standards.

 

[bèlla]

There’s no such thing as high or low standards. They’re called preferences. And everyone has them. Some more than others.

The issue is rejection and the reality that dating (on and offline) rewards beauty, fitness, and wealth more significantly than other attributes.

 

[expos4ever]

My point - and I believe there are studies that demonstrate this - is that online dating in particular has the effect of causing people to raise the standards they would otherwise apply in real life. And to the point of being quite unrealistic.

 

[bèlla]

My point - and I believe there are studies that demonstrate this - is that online dating in particular has the effect of causing people to raise the standards they would otherwise apply in real life. And to the point of being quite unrealistic.

If they’re willing to live with the consequences of that decision that’s all that matters. Whether its realistic or not.

 

[Anguspure]

First, some background. In the past, I dated anyone I was attracted to, Christian or not (mostly not, if we're talking about someone who really seemed to be concerned about God). This resulted in me marrying a spouse who used me and cheated on me - or so I and everyone else believes, based on her behavior.

My ex claimed to be a Christian, but there was no evidence of it until she met me and wanted to date/marry me. If I had been more cautious about accepting her word on her Christianity, I wouldn't be where I am today. So, from now on, I am determined to only date women whose Christianity is obvious before they meet me.

Which brings me to my thread's title: It will take a miracle for me to find "Miss Right." Why? Consider all the variables :

- She has to be a genuine Christian. I have it on good authority that "Straight is the gate and narrow the way and few go therein." So, we're probably ruling out 9 out of 10 women right off the bat.
- She has to be local (within 40 minutes, tops). I'm not looking for a long-distance romance. I'm looking for someone to put my arm around on the couch and watch TV with, to go on walks with, to go to church with, to work out with, etc. I think it's safe to say that 99.99999% of the Christian women in the world don't live within 40 minutes of me.
- I have to meet her. I go to a big church and you can go there for years without meeting 3/4 of the people. And even if I see a woman at church I am interested in meeting, it can take months to be in a situation where that meeting isn't weird and ham-fisted. Most of the time they are surrounded by people from the moment they enter church until the moment they are getting in their car.
- She must be looking for a man in my age range. I'm 54 and, even though people always assume I'm in my 40s (I'm in pretty good shape and don't really have any wrinkles), I've noticed women are very hung up on the age issue after a certain age. Maybe they think, "I can't be so old that I have to date a man in his 50s!"
- She has to find me attractive. Opinions vary.
- I have to find her attractive. I'm not someone who has to date the most beautiful woman possible (personality is more important than looks), but I have to be at least somewhat attracted to her. And whether a woman is in fairly good shape is very important to me. If she's not, I'm just not attracted. Finding a fit, single woman over 40 or 50 is tough. When you do, you find that she is "spoiled for choice" (she has a ton of men pursuing her).
- Our personalities have to be compatible. I'm a pretty lighthearted guy most of the time. A woman who is always serious would hate me. But I'm also a serious guy when it come to serious things (I'm an INTP or ENTP, depending on the test). A woman who believes talking about serious things is dumb or boring would hate me. Also, I dislike rude people ("straight talkers", as they often call themselves). It's not that hard to couch your point in careful words.
- We have to have compatible interests. I don't want to jump out of an airplane. I want to visit cool places and take road trips. I don't care about sports and don't have a favorite team. I like movies. Stuff like that.


So, that's the dilemma. It will take a miracle. And yes, yes, I know God does miracles. I've been asking!

Thoughts?

I can add spending most of my time at sea to the list. Not much hope there then...

 

[Lady Donna Marie]

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