Hi, so a couple weeks ago I was a co-leader at a Christian camp for children.
After the camp was over, one of the girls reached out to me on Facebook making up a conversation. I was a little surprised, because we didn't talk much doing the camp as we were both very busy, and I'm pretty reserved in my personality.
Soon after the conversation she straight forwardly invited me to her graduation party because she thought I seemed like an interesting person, as she said, and wanted to get to know me better. She said it was alright if i declined. But sweet as she seemed I pushed all shyness to the side and prayed to the Lord that his will be done and went to this party with only strangers and one other girl from the camp I knew beforehand.
I guess something in me was hoping that this could be the right girl that our heavenly father has chosen for me and me for her. Recently in my prayers I started to include marriage and that the Lord according to his will would help me connect with a girl. Coincidence or not, I'm trying to find the right balance and appropriate and respectful way of handling this.
After the graduation party she asked if I wanted to meet once again, since we didn't get to talk that much because of the many people. So we did, and I really enjoyed our time together. She messaged me afterwards that she was looking forward to the next time we could meet and that she enjoyed my company. For my own sake, I'm trying not to make false interpretations and end up being hurt. While liking this girl, I'm trying to hold unto that she is friendly and we're just trying to get to know one another.
Some concern and little frustration lies in the fact that I like her, but I also feel out of her league. I don't have the courage to express my feelings because of the uncertainties I feel. She just finished her Masters degree in psychology and I'm studying a bachelor's degree in Pedagogy. She is very much the opposite of me in that she is very outgoing and talkative. I'm more of a thinker. My past of many years in isolation due to anxiety and symptoms of depression is causing some ''mild'' challenges in my ability to communicate and interpret. That's my theory at least, it seems complicated.
Anyway, I thought I would invite her to go for a walk in nature, and we had a good long walk talking both private and of common interests such as literature.
I must say I find it a little energy draining and I'm having some troubles living up to the standards (I think/worry she has). She asked if I had SnapChat, and I said I would give it a try. But I feel to old being on so many social platforms making constant interactions. I told her this and didn't reply to the first couple messages I received. I have no idea how to make a proper response I feel.
So the flow of messaging and meeting in person three times, has been replaced with this other phase that seems pretty 'unknown'. No matter what, I believe that the Lord is with me with or without this going in the direction of a relationship of any kind. If it's running out of steam I believe the Lord is trying to show or have me learn something that will bear fruit in some way. I'm a little afraid of hoping, but I'm praying that if it is his will then I will take on the responsibility (even though it does seem a little frightening).
There's many details in the communication between me and her that is lost, I will try to provide any if needed be. If you have any advice or thoughts my ears are wide open. Thank you for taking the time.
Sincerely, Mathias
After the camp was over, one of the girls reached out to me on Facebook making up a conversation. I was a little surprised, because we didn't talk much doing the camp as we were both very busy, and I'm pretty reserved in my personality.
Soon after the conversation she straight forwardly invited me to her graduation party because she thought I seemed like an interesting person, as she said, and wanted to get to know me better. She said it was alright if i declined. But sweet as she seemed I pushed all shyness to the side and prayed to the Lord that his will be done and went to this party with only strangers and one other girl from the camp I knew beforehand.
I guess something in me was hoping that this could be the right girl that our heavenly father has chosen for me and me for her. Recently in my prayers I started to include marriage and that the Lord according to his will would help me connect with a girl. Coincidence or not, I'm trying to find the right balance and appropriate and respectful way of handling this.
After the graduation party she asked if I wanted to meet once again, since we didn't get to talk that much because of the many people. So we did, and I really enjoyed our time together. She messaged me afterwards that she was looking forward to the next time we could meet and that she enjoyed my company. For my own sake, I'm trying not to make false interpretations and end up being hurt. While liking this girl, I'm trying to hold unto that she is friendly and we're just trying to get to know one another.
Some concern and little frustration lies in the fact that I like her, but I also feel out of her league. I don't have the courage to express my feelings because of the uncertainties I feel. She just finished her Masters degree in psychology and I'm studying a bachelor's degree in Pedagogy. She is very much the opposite of me in that she is very outgoing and talkative. I'm more of a thinker. My past of many years in isolation due to anxiety and symptoms of depression is causing some ''mild'' challenges in my ability to communicate and interpret. That's my theory at least, it seems complicated.
Anyway, I thought I would invite her to go for a walk in nature, and we had a good long walk talking both private and of common interests such as literature.
I must say I find it a little energy draining and I'm having some troubles living up to the standards (I think/worry she has). She asked if I had SnapChat, and I said I would give it a try. But I feel to old being on so many social platforms making constant interactions. I told her this and didn't reply to the first couple messages I received. I have no idea how to make a proper response I feel.
So the flow of messaging and meeting in person three times, has been replaced with this other phase that seems pretty 'unknown'. No matter what, I believe that the Lord is with me with or without this going in the direction of a relationship of any kind. If it's running out of steam I believe the Lord is trying to show or have me learn something that will bear fruit in some way. I'm a little afraid of hoping, but I'm praying that if it is his will then I will take on the responsibility (even though it does seem a little frightening).
There's many details in the communication between me and her that is lost, I will try to provide any if needed be. If you have any advice or thoughts my ears are wide open. Thank you for taking the time.
Sincerely, Mathias
Last edited: