Husband just said he wants DIVORCE

[Itsahappyday]

My husband just said that Monday he will be speaking to a lawyer to divorce me. He says I am stupid. When I asked him about the promises he made to me, till death do us part, he said I am dead to him. He said he'll be happy when I am gone.

He doesn't like it when I defend myself, he only remembers what I might have said in response to his comments, nothing about the hurtful things he said. I am very distracted and clumsy.

He sounds like he hates me. I said we could go for counseling but he said he wouldn't go see someone who knows less of the Bible than he does.

He even threw a paper towel roll that was almost full in my face.

Please pray for healing of our marriage.

If we divorce, I will need serious counselling because I think I am starting to believe I am stupid.

 

[anna ~ grace]

I assure you are not stupid, dear. I will definitely pray for you guys.

Your husband should not insult you, throw stuff at you, or treat you unkindly. *That* kind of behavior is stupid. Frankly.

How long has this been going on?

 

[EmmaCat]

Praying for you!

 

[derpytia]

My husband just said that Monday he will be speaking to a lawyer to divorce me. He says I am stupid. When I asked him about the promises he made to me, till death do us part, he said I am dead to him. He said he'll be happy when I am gone.

He doesn't like it when I defend myself, he only remembers what I might have said in response to his comments, nothing about the hurtful things he said. I am very distracted and clumsy.

He sounds like he hates me. I said we could go for counseling but he said he wouldn't go see someone who knows less of the Bible than he does.

He even threw a paper towel roll that was almost full in my face.

Please pray for healing of our marriage.

If we divorce, I will need serious counselling because I think I am starting to believe I am stupid.

I will pray for you. I pay that God will heal your marriage so that your husband stops abusing you and instead apologizes to you so that you can both heal.

 

[SeventhFisherofMen]

My husband just said that Monday he will be speaking to a lawyer to divorce me. He says I am stupid. When I asked him about the promises he made to me, till death do us part, he said I am dead to him. He said he'll be happy when I am gone.

He doesn't like it when I defend myself, he only remembers what I might have said in response to his comments, nothing about the hurtful things he said. I am very distracted and clumsy.

He sounds like he hates me. I said we could go for counseling but he said he wouldn't go see someone who knows less of the Bible than he does.

He even threw a paper towel roll that was almost full in my face.

Please pray for healing of our marriage.

If we divorce, I will need serious counselling because I think I am starting to believe I am stupid.

I’m so sorry Itsahappyday, I really have prayed for you and I want you to know that God loves you and that you are not unintelligent. I care that things work out for you as you are my sister in Christ. I’m so sorry what is happening to you is happening but I pray that your husband reconciles with you and leaves the divorce topic behind never to pick it up again. In Jesus’s Name I pray, Amen!

 

[Itsahappyday]

I’m so sorry Itsahappyday, I really have prayed for you and I want you to know that God loves you and that you are not unintelligent. I care that things work out for you as you are my sister in Christ. I’m so sorry what is happening to you is happening but I pray that your husband reconciles with you and leaves the divorce topic behind never to pick it up again. In Jesus’s Name I pray, Amen!

Thank you, I come in agreement

 

[Itsahappyday]

He just said to me "prove to me in the next 24 hours that you are intelligent and I will call off the divorce"

Help...... What is he looking for me to do??? What will prove it?

 

[Itsahappyday]

This started Friday because he wanted me to send a email and he corrected it 3 times because he didn't like the way I worded things, then he got angry because I wanted to wash my hair before leaving (he never told me the time we were leaving) and then he comes in the bedroom tells me to s.. up, quit talking yet he continues to talking to himself saying things about me... And expects me to sit there and hear his remarks and say nothing.

Then yesterday I didn't realise he wanted the papers filed in a folder starting with the latest date at the back (so 1st January top to 31st). I put the 31st on top and went backwards so that the 1st was at the back of the file folder and this caused him to be so angry and call me stupid. He said a book begins at one, I said this is not a book and I said I didn't know he wanted it that way.

He was angry because I said that, because it has nothing to do with him wanting it that way, the way he wants it done is the only way it's supposed to be done.

I tried to be very calm but he got super angry anyways and then later says its my fault the argument started.

 

[Itsahappyday]

In order to keep the peace, I would have to agree with him always, not voice a contrary opinion and definitely make sure I don't agree with someone's else's opinion when it is different from his.

He doesn't like it when I do not agree with him.

He keeps saying something like I am coming against God's anointed because paraphrase I tell him his behaviour at church doesn't match his home life but I tell him I too am God's anointed (because the Holy Spirit lives in me too)

He told everyone a few weeks ago I was the perfect wife.

 

[sunshine100]

I promise you that your not stupid,I'm praying for you.

 

[Deborah D]

My husband just said that Monday he will be speaking to a lawyer to divorce me. He says I am stupid. When I asked him about the promises he made to me, till death do us part, he said I am dead to him. He said he'll be happy when I am gone.

He doesn't like it when I defend myself, he only remembers what I might have said in response to his comments, nothing about the hurtful things he said. I am very distracted and clumsy.

He sounds like he hates me. I said we could go for counseling but he said he wouldn't go see someone who knows less of the Bible than he does.

He even threw a paper towel roll that was almost full in my face.

Please pray for healing of our marriage.

If we divorce, I will need serious counselling because I think I am starting to believe I am stupid.

My prayers are with you! I pray that you will able to keep your eyes on God and feel His love for you during this trial. He is a God of miracles, and I pray that your husband will turn his heart over to Jesus Christ.

 

[Itsahappyday]

Pray that I will not see myself in his eyes but as God sees me. And that he will see me thr eyes God's

At times he talks and his tone sounds like he despises me. He says people we know think I am stupid too

Please pray.


I believe the Word of God and yesterday I felt like the Lord was telling me to look up what it says about slaves to masters in the Bible and it fits my situation, if I could live it better, it would help.. Pray I could live out 1 Peter 2:18-

18 [You who are] household servants, be submissive to your masters with all [proper] respect, not only to those who are kind and considerate and reasonable, but also to those who are surly (overbearing, unjust, and crooked).
19 For one is regarded favorably (is approved, acceptable, and thankworthy) if, as in the sight of God, he endures the pain of unjust suffering.
20 [After all] what kind of glory [is there in it] if, when you do wrong and are punished for it, you take it patiently? But if you bear patiently with suffering [which results] when you do right andthat is undeserved, it is acceptable and pleasing to God.
21 For even to this were you called [it is inseparable from your vocation]. For Christ also suffered for you, leaving you [His personal] example, so that you should follow in His footsteps.
22 He was guilty of no sin, neither was deceit (guile) ever found on His lips. [Isa. 53:9.]
23 When He was reviled and insulted, He did not revile or offer insult in return; [when] He was abused and suffered, He made no threats [of vengeance]; but he trusted [Himself and everything] to Him Who judges fairly.

 

[GraceTruthLove]

Based on what you have written here, it sounds like your husband has anger problems and is abusive. Frankly, the comments suggesting that his behavior is your fault are devoid of the Lord's compassion. Just accepting your husband's abusive behavior or trying to alter yourself will not change him.

Please don't believe you are stupid, or that his choices and behavior are your fault. While Christian wives are commanded to submit to their husbands, husbands are also called to love their wives with the same sacrificial love as Christ showed for the Church (Ephesians 5).

Now then, please know I am praying for you and your husband along with many others here. I pray for peace and the changing power of Jesus to turn this situation around. Please stay strong and secure in the unfailing love of Christ!

 

[Itsahappyday]

Based on what you have written here, it sounds like your husband has anger problems and is abusive. Frankly, the comments suggesting that his behavior is your fault are devoid of the Lord's compassion. Just accepting your husband's abusive behavior or trying to alter yourself will not change him.

Please don't believe you are stupid, or that his choices and behavior are your fault. While Christian wives are commanded to submit to their husbands, husbands are also called to love their wives with the same sacrificial love as Christ showed for the Church (Ephesians 5).

Now then, please know I am praying for you and your husband along with many others here. I pray for peace and the changing power of Jesus to turn this situation around. Please stay strong and secure in the unfailing love of Christ!

Thank you for your prayers I need a miracle for this situation to turn around.

I wish others would know how he treats me at home but he's careful to be super nice in public.

I wish I could shine, be so special and amazing that he would be happy with me

 

[St. Helens]

MOD HAT ON
The Prayer Wall isn't the place for giving in-depth advice. It is a place to support the thread starter in prayer.
MOD HAT OFF​

 

[GraceTruthLove]

Thank you for your prayers I need a miracle for this situation to turn around.

I wish others would know how he treats me at home but he's careful to be super nice in public.

I wish I could shine, be so special and amazing that he would be happy with me

I wish I could reach through the computer screen and take your hand right now and just pray with you. I wish I could just make all of this right and heal the deep hurts. It's much harder when other people in your life don't know or don't want to see what's going on.

Here is what I can do:
"31 What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? 32 Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? 33 Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. 34 Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us.

35 Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? 36 (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”a]">[a]) 37 No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us." Romans 8:31-36.

Please know your husband's feelings about you are not the final say on you. What Christ has declared about you is quite a different story. As I said above, know many here are praying for your situation! While I don't have the answers, I know our Father, the God of Miracles, does.

 

[Itsahappyday]

I wish I could reach through the computer screen and take your hand right now and just pray with you. I wish I could just make all of this right and heal the deep hurts. It's much harder when other people in your life don't know or don't want to see what's going on.

Here is what I can do:
"31 What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? 32 Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? 33 Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. 34 Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us.

35 Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? 36 (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”a]">[a]) 37 No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us." Romans 8:31-36.

Please know your husband's feelings about you are not the final say on you. What Christ has declared about you is quite a different story. As I said above, know many here are praying for your situation! While I don't have the answers, I know our Father, the God of Miracles, does.

Thank you so much fur your prayers and kind words

 

[Itsahappyday]

He just told me that there are 5 types of people and te kind of person i am, he has to use the rod of discipline to beat the stupidity out of me. That I don't learn with softness. Maybe I am clueless / do stupid things at times, could he be right?

Maybe please pray I will be smart not stupid.

 

[LoricaLady]

You husband is showing signs of domestic abuse, like throwing things at you, personally insulting you and so on. Therefore I pray for wisdom for you, and direction, and healing. Studies show that domestic abusers almost never, ever change and very commonly they get worse. Therefore I pray that your marriage will be saved ONLY if that is the path the Holy Spirit absolutely leads you to go with.

You might want to check out vids from a Christian psychotherapist on You Tube whose channel is called Surviving Narcissism. I am no expert, but it seems to me your husband is showing quite a few of the problems the doctor speaks of.

If you check that out and feel it is describing him, you might want to listen to others on the topic and how they have handled it and how they finally got healing from the abuse.

 

[LoricaLady]

P.S. I just looked over the posts and saw where you prayed not to be stupid. How sad, dear. The problem isn't your intelligence. Maybe check out those vids and see where the real problem lies. Your husband's cruelty is the problem. There are cruel, even sadistic, people out there! I pray you will see that and value yourself and recover from all the verbal, and other, abuse, you have suffered.