LUST

[ilovejcsog]

Does lust in one form or another ever stop hounding us when we are celibate? Any sure way of getting rid of it short of losing celibacy?

 

[Brian Mcnamee]

you have made a critical error in assuming leaving celibacy removes lust.... it only increases its appetite. God gave us strong drives and it is natural to burn with desire. The key is for you to look at any woman as a possible mate and instead of dating when you find yourself interested you begin a courting process. My nephew is now engaged at 29 and found a good young lady and went to her dad and asked permission to court her. The father talked to the daughter and she was inclined to get to know my nephew. The started to talk and she knew his intention was to seek a wife and not a girlfriend. They liked each other and started counseling together and seeking advice from older married couples. They are now engaged and will be married within a year of the start of the courting process. If you set goals in your life and the top one is to follow the LORD and he gives you the desire for a spouse then you should be preparing your character to be the best husband you can. If you struggle with lust you need to recognize that that is not going to bring you lifelong benefits. That real love is much deeper. If you find a wife you find a good thing. So now start praying for a mate and perparing your heart to be a good man for whoever you find.

 

[ilovejcsog]

you have made a critical error in assuming leaving celibacy removes lust.... it only increases its appetite. God gave us strong drives and it is natural to burn with desire. The key is for you to look at any woman as a possible mate and instead of dating when you find yourself interested you begin a courting process. My nephew is now engaged at 29 and found a good young lady and went to her dad and asked permission to court her. The father talked to the daughter and she was inclined to get to know my nephew. The started to talk and she knew his intention was to seek a wife and not a girlfriend. They liked each other and started counseling together and seeking advice from older married couples. They are now engaged and will be married within a year of the start of the courting process. If you set goals in your life and the top one is to follow the LORD and he gives you the desire for a spouse then you should be preparing your character to be the best husband you can. If you struggle with lust you need to recognize that that is not going to bring you lifelong benefits. That real love is much deeper. If you find a wife you find a good thing. So now start praying for a mate and perparing your heart to be a good man for whoever you find.

You are right, I phrased it wrong.

 

[Thess]

Thank you for the prayer.

You bet. My friend, you are not understanding the "body". God didn't give it to you to defile it this way. Your body is literally designed to be indwelt by the Holy Spirit. God won't indwell anyone who is living this way. It is impossible. I can give you a toooon of scriptures if you're serious, along with commentary that you'll find usefull. I'm a former sex addict myself....and couldn't overcome it until I became a slave to Christ, a real slave to Jesus.

The more of you that you surrender of yourself to Him, the more you will become empowered to change. But if you're not willing to turn and give yourself to Him, "expect nothing", God tells us. I will help you, if you're serious.

 

[Kenny'sID]

you have made a critical error in assuming leaving celibacy removes lust.

I saw no error at all, just a fair question.

ilovejcsog, I think most of us struggle with that most if not all our lives. It's all about keeping our mind in the right place, and what has worked best for me is to just not think about it. Cut the thought out of your mind as soon as you have it, and don't dwell on it beyond that.

In the end it's actually easy to stop, the tough part is wanting to bad enough and if we do we can get it pretty well under control most of the time. Some will do better than others, just get rid of the temptations and when we can't do that, as I said, just don't let our thoughts get away from us.

We can also ask God for help, and ths part of the lords prayer comes to mind here..."Lead us not into temptation/deliver us from evil."

 

[Ttalkkugjil]

Does lust in one form or another ever stop hounding us when we are celibate? Any sure way of getting rid of it short of losing celibacy?

In my experience, lust is an ever present enemy to be combatted.

 

[Kenny'sID]

Thank you for the prayer.
I disagree with you though, we do not stop sinning when we receive the holy spirit we just don't practice sinning.

So true, and I personally would be terrified to even teach such a thing, let alone believe it.

 

[ilovejcsog]

I saw no error at all, just a fair question.

ilovejcsog, I think most of us struggle with that most if not all our lives. It's all about keeping our mind in the right place, and what has worked best for me is to just not think about it. Cut the thought out of your mind as soon as you have it, and don't dwell on it beyond that.

In the end it's actually easy to stop, the tough part is wanting to bad enough and if we do we can get it pretty well under control most of the time. Some will do better than others, just get rid of the temptations and when we can't do that, as I said, just don't let our thoughts get away from us.

We can also ask God for help, and ths part of the lords prayer comes to mind here..."Lead us not into temptation/deliver us from evil."

Thank you for your words. This is the way I feel. Sometimes I get lustful thoughts and I fight them but I would like never to have them. I don't dwell because I know it is wrong. I do ask God to help me with this daily. I am looking forward to when I never have them again. I am thankful that I am not the only one that has this problem.(Sorry, sounds like I am wishing it on others)
Thanks again.

 

[ilovejcsog]

In my experience, lust is an ever present enemy to be combatted.

Very well put!

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

Does lust in one form or another ever stop hounding us when we are celibate? Any sure way of getting rid of it short of losing celibacy?

It is part of the flesh. It could also be an indication that you may not be called to celibacy seeing that Paul said that it is better to marry than to burn. I'm not trying to influence your choice, but to encourage you to seek the Lord to see if you might need to hear from Him about it.

 

[Thess]

It is part of the flesh. It could also be an indication that you may not be called to celibacy seeing that Paul said that it is better to marry than to burn. I'm not trying to influence your choice, but to encourage you to seek the Lord to see if you might need to hear from Him about it.

I stopped praying for a wife, for if God granted me a wife, He would be leading me into adultery. That seems wrong to me, thus I doubt that God would do such a thing.

Also, I've learned that the Body is made for the Lord and the Lord for the Body. Our bodies are to be indwelt by the Spirit, so sex doesn't even seem appealing to me anymore, and believe me, I was a total sex addict. Man, I was terrible. We can over come this problem....we just have to have the faith of Abraham.

 

[ilovejcsog]

It is part of the flesh. It could also be an indication that you may not be called to celibacy seeing that Paul said that it is better to marry than to burn. I'm not trying to influence your choice, but to encourage you to seek the Lord to see if you might need to hear from Him about it.

Thank you for your advice. I have no choice in the matter. I am an unwilling celibate, lol.
I should have said that differently. as in Circumstances have given me no other choice.

 

[Presbyterian Continuist]

"I can testify that I don't sin very often."

This a contradiction to what you said originally. I am sure you have put guilt on people who read your words that don't know better. Your original post: "A person will stop sinning when they possess the Holy Spirit."

"What do you think was meant when it was discussed that our Sin Nature is removed, or, cut out?'"

We no longer practice sin.

When we are converted to Christ, we don't change from who we are. We are still sinners until the day we die. It is that God through the redemptive work of Christ on the cross, declares us "not guilty" and gives us a free pardon. Then we get filled with the Holy Spirit to work sanctification in us. We will always see ourselves as:
"I'm just a poor sinner, and nothing at all,
But Jesus Christ is my all in all".

 

[Sabertooth]

Does lust in one form or another ever stop hounding us when we are celibate?

There are two major views on celibacy.

• The CHARISMATIC view sees celibacy as one of the Spiritual gifts. Those who have that gift have no significant desire to marry/have sex. They are able to devote more of their time to Kingdom endeavors. [See 1 Corinthians 7.]
  
  In that same passage, Paul warns that those who don't have that gift should marry, lest they fall into temptation.
• The MONASTIC view declares that your libido is something that you can willfully offer as a demonstration of piety; as if you could trade it in exchange for more spirituality. That if you discipline yourself enough, you can make your libido subside.

These two views are fundamentally opposed and mutually exclusive.

 

[Lost4words]

Lust can be extremely hard to fight. I know from experience.

What i am trying to do these days is to try and picture Our Lord on the cross, suffering for me / us instead of those sinful thoughts of lust. I offer up my thoughts, my weaknesses to God. My lusts, my sins. I place them at His feet.

I ask, that, 'God's will be done'.

I have lost so many battles with lust etc but, i am determined, with the help of God, to WIN the war!

God bless you OP.

 

[Sabertooth]

Lust can be extremely hard to fight. I know from experience.

Not all libido is lust. Libido is a valid, God-given appetite. Lust happens when we go outside of proper channels to satisfy our libido.

 

[Verv]

Praying a lot -- in a meditative way -- will give you the power to set lust aside.

It's difficult... But if the mind is trained to let go of ideas and just commit itself to prayer (something that is taught by many Eastern Orthodox Christians), one can get to a point where you can just set lust down.

In Buddhism, it is said that you should treat anger like a hot cup of tea... When you pick up a hot cup that you don't want to hold, what do you do? You just put it down.

You can do that with anger, and you can do that with lust. Of course, lust takes more effort, but with some practice, you can learn to empty the mind through prayer.

you have made a critical error in assuming leaving celibacy removes lust.... it only increases its appetite.

I disagree...

I think this might be true in the short term, but once you really get on a roll, it generally works out.

Having said that: there is a reason why monastics tend to live in the mountains in general isolation.

I would say that I moreso disagree with this statement because I feel like stimulating lust via things like inappropriate contentography or actual sexual engagement can result in desiring greater amounts of stimuilation and does nothing to actually abate the lust.

 

[Gregory Thompson]

lust in general is not the passionate reaction, it is the objectification, it is in essence complete apathy towards others.

When dealing with any sin, confessing the root is the main deal, and since thoughts self replicate, confess a lot, and trust God a lot to cleanse.

see also 1 John 1:9

 

[Petros2015]

I hope people will talk of their experiences in fighting lust, what works for them.

Put all inappropriate contentography away for starters; I was addicted for like 30 years, I'm about a year and 1/2 clean now. That will start to dry up the weed. You'll never win if you keep feeding it.

Instead of lusting for someone, in an image, in person, whatever, when someone catches your eye, start praying for them. Their peace of mind, body, soul. That their loved ones be happy, their relationships be good. Ask God to take things like lust, adultery, infidelity out of your heart and replace them with his Holy Spirit. Surrender the right to lust and ask for the ability to love. For me it was (and is) a process; but God will be faithful to see it through to completion.

Also, getting old helps So do support groups, I eventually went to SA. You will hear a lot of very very painful stories about what the end of unbridled lust is in terms of damage to self and others, marriages, health, families, careers. If nothing else it helps to understand what the end of the road is if you let lust be the driver.

 

[MartyF]

Does lust in one form or another ever stop hounding us when we are celibate? Any sure way of getting rid of it short of losing celibacy?

Are you talking about the male or female experience? I won't speak to the female experience as I am not female. I do know that they are quite different.

 

[tampasteve]

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