Losing faith with life and opportunities

[Kimosabe2019]

This is my first time on here.

My focus for today is to reach out to the world of Christians for some support and for guidance.

Let me begin with myself. I am 48 years of age and I've messed my entire life up. I discovered God at a young age but I chose a life of sin. I finally had enough around 2012 where I decided to pick up the bible in jail and once I got out I wanted nothing else but to get baptized. I got baptized on my birthday in 2015. Something was removed from me as a result of my baptism...the spirit of alcoholism. I think something had attached to me and kept me in bondage to my disease. The power it had over me has been broken. I've had several relapses in the past 3 years since my baptism. Life just got too overwhelming with step-daughters who over-whelmed us with the anti-god, anti-love, anti-jesus, no respect for anyone attitudes. I had to walk out and take a breather and things got so rough that I picked up the drink in order to survive. Which was the wrong decision but I've done it for so long that the old thinking always was easiest.

Now just recently, we've taken our home back with force and literally kicked the daughters out for their lack of respect. The home is quiet and peaceful and I have tons of time to myself for writing, contemplation, praying, etc.

Except that I can't get a job. I have no drivers licence. I have a criminal record that is longer than my whole arm. I never finished university. I owe fines to the government that exceed $5000. My school loans from 1992 are defaulted and now the government just takes my tax returns every year. I owe approximately $14,500 for my student loans. My cellphone costs $120.00 per month. My internet bill comes to $110.00 per month. The only calls I receive on my cellphone are calls from credit agencies for all the unpaid bills I've racked up. No job interviews at all.

Luckily I have a strong woman who also got baptized in 2017. She is the main breadwinner in this family and she pays our mortgage, our car payments, our groceries, and all our utilities. Our monthly bills are more than we make together which include my Unemployment Insurance.

Everywhere I look, everywhere I try everything costs money. I need to get my drivers licence but that costs money. I need to get a pardon but that costs money. Now our vehicle has broken down several times and now she's had to get a friend to pick her up to commute an hour away for work. We need help and we're slowly drowning. Our credit ratings have fallen below the 500 mark We may lose our mortgage when it comes time to renew.

No-one wants to hire me because of my criminal record. We both pray to God for help but we always somehow manage to scrape by but that's not really living. I am losing faith. I am losing hope. I thought that by living properly abiding all laws and loving one another and living blameless lives and always doing the right thing we would be rewarded. Something is missing but what?

Now it's your turn. Help.

 

[zephcom]

This is my first time on here.

My focus for today is to reach out to the world of Christians for some support and for guidance.

Let me begin with myself. I am 48 years of age and I've messed my entire life up. I discovered God at a young age but I chose a life of sin. I finally had enough around 2012 where I decided to pick up the bible in jail and once I got out I wanted nothing else but to get baptized. I got baptized on my birthday in 2015. Something was removed from me as a result of my baptism...the spirit of alcoholism. I think something had attached to me and kept me in bondage to my disease. The power it had over me has been broken. I've had several relapses in the past 3 years since my baptism. Life just got too overwhelming with step-daughters who over-whelmed us with the anti-god, anti-love, anti-jesus, no respect for anyone attitudes. I had to walk out and take a breather and things got so rough that I picked up the drink in order to survive. Which was the wrong decision but I've done it for so long that the old thinking always was easiest.

Now just recently, we've taken our home back with force and literally kicked the daughters out for their lack of respect. The home is quiet and peaceful and I have tons of time to myself for writing, contemplation, praying, etc.

Except that I can't get a job. I have no drivers licence. I have a criminal record that is longer than my whole arm. I never finished university. I owe fines to the government that exceed $5000. My school loans from 1992 are defaulted and now the government just takes my tax returns every year. I owe approximately $14,500 for my student loans. My cellphone costs $120.00 per month. My internet bill comes to $110.00 per month. The only calls I receive on my cellphone are calls from credit agencies for all the unpaid bills I've racked up. No job interviews at all.

Luckily I have a strong woman who also got baptized in 2017. She is the main breadwinner in this family and she pays our mortgage, our car payments, our groceries, and all our utilities. Our monthly bills are more than we make together which include my Unemployment Insurance.

Everywhere I look, everywhere I try everything costs money. I need to get my drivers licence but that costs money. I need to get a pardon but that costs money. Now our vehicle has broken down several times and now she's had to get a friend to pick her up to commute an hour away for work. We need help and we're slowly drowning. Our credit ratings have fallen below the 500 mark We may lose our mortgage when it comes time to renew.

No-one wants to hire me because of my criminal record. We both pray to God for help but we always somehow manage to scrape by but that's not really living. I am losing faith. I am losing hope. I thought that by living properly abiding all laws and loving one another and living blameless lives and always doing the right thing we would be rewarded. Something is missing but what?

Now it's your turn. Help.

Whew. I would like to say that you are the exception to the rule but many many people are living in much the same hole as you are.

Without knowing the specifics of your financial condition, ie how much is coming in, all living costs, cost of living you your particular area etc, it would be impossible to give detailed suggestions.

Generally though, the goal would be to bring living costs down to under the income. That means controlling things like phone and internet costs. One doesn't stand a chance of succeeding in the modern world without Internet access, but one also should not have to pay top price for that access. Same goes for cell phones. I suspect Canada is the same as America with 'pay as you go' phone options like TracFone.

Look for other ways to cut costs like buy second hand when possible and learning to eat healthy on a budget.

Finally, with a history such as yours, getting job is going to require a lot of networking. People, especially people who hire, need to know who you are now and not who you were. Getting out into the volunteer community and showing yourself off as respectable and responsible will improve the chances of someone spotting you and being willing to take a chance on you.

 

[Loyce KG]

This is my first time on here.

My focus for today is to reach out to the world of Christians for some support and for guidance.

Let me begin with myself. I am 48 years of age and I've messed my entire life up. I discovered God at a young age but I chose a life of sin. I finally had enough around 2012 where I decided to pick up the bible in jail and once I got out I wanted nothing else but to get baptized. I got baptized on my birthday in 2015. Something was removed from me as a result of my baptism...the spirit of alcoholism. I think something had attached to me and kept me in bondage to my disease. The power it had over me has been broken. I've had several relapses in the past 3 years since my baptism. Life just got too overwhelming with step-daughters who over-whelmed us with the anti-god, anti-love, anti-jesus, no respect for anyone attitudes. I had to walk out and take a breather and things got so rough that I picked up the drink in order to survive. Which was the wrong decision but I've done it for so long that the old thinking always was easiest.

Now just recently, we've taken our home back with force and literally kicked the daughters out for their lack of respect. The home is quiet and peaceful and I have tons of time to myself for writing, contemplation, praying, etc.

Except that I can't get a job. I have no drivers licence. I have a criminal record that is longer than my whole arm. I never finished university. I owe fines to the government that exceed $5000. My school loans from 1992 are defaulted and now the government just takes my tax returns every year. I owe approximately $14,500 for my student loans. My cellphone costs $120.00 per month. My internet bill comes to $110.00 per month. The only calls I receive on my cellphone are calls from credit agencies for all the unpaid bills I've racked up. No job interviews at all.

Luckily I have a strong woman who also got baptized in 2017. She is the main breadwinner in this family and she pays our mortgage, our car payments, our groceries, and all our utilities. Our monthly bills are more than we make together which include my Unemployment Insurance.

Everywhere I look, everywhere I try everything costs money. I need to get my drivers licence but that costs money. I need to get a pardon but that costs money. Now our vehicle has broken down several times and now she's had to get a friend to pick her up to commute an hour away for work. We need help and we're slowly drowning. Our credit ratings have fallen below the 500 mark We may lose our mortgage when it comes time to renew.

No-one wants to hire me because of my criminal record. We both pray to God for help but we always somehow manage to scrape by but that's not really living. I am losing faith. I am losing hope. I thought that by living properly abiding all laws and loving one another and living blameless lives and always doing the right thing we would be rewarded. Something is missing but what?

Now it's your turn. Help.

I empathise with you brother in Christ. The Christian walk is war. 2 Tim 2:3 says,
“You therefore MUST ENDURE hardship as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.”
Wars are exhausting, physically and emotionally draining and every soldier often gets tired. Many soldiers who experience the harshest of combat want to get out and it's the same in the walk of salvation. We want to escape it or worst case scenario, give up and surrender to failure.

But DO NOT GIVE UP-NEVER EVER.
Instead, “take courage! Do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded” 2 Chronicles 5:7

When that old sin comes knocking at your door and crouching, flee even the thought of embracing it. Don't allow room for negotiation with sin or temptation. Remember, "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.2 Cor 10:13

Don't quit; When your soul is weary and patience is running low, remember that God's grace is sufficient for you and His power is made PERFECT in your weakness.

Don't quit; when your long, faithful prayers haven't been answered YET. God wants you to wait because "all things work together for good to those who are in Christ Jesus". Remember the persistent widow, pray and don't lose heart (Luke 18;1)

Don't quit; when the fiery darts of the enemy wound your flesh, stand strong in the Lord and in the power of His might, put on the whole armor of God. (Ephes 6:10-19)

Don't quit; when you have been faithful and doing good obscurely for your Father who sees in secret will reward you (Matthew 6:4).

Don't quit; when you have turned your life around in christ and your old reputation still scorns hard at you. Remember the old has passed and you are a new creation. You are blessed when others revile, persecute , accuse you falsely on God's account (Matthew 5:11)

Don't quit waiting on God; for those who Wait for the Lord, shall renew their strength and mount up on wings like eagles (Isaiah 40:31)

When you fall back into sin, don't wallow in guilt. Get back up, repent and steer forward. If you confess your sin, God is faithful and just to forgive you. He declares you His righteousness through Christ Jesus.

Above all, remember the saints of old who endured hardships for our example. Look to Jesus, “fight the good fight of the faith” , and finish your race. We live by faith and not by sight. When you have done the will of God, you will receive what is promised: his great and eternal reward.
In eternity, the hardships of this life would not amount to anything “by your endurance you will gain your lives".Luke 21:19

Hang in there, joy comes in the morning. Thank God for the good things in your life now, your wife, your church and your house. God will not leave you ashamed. Trust Him to provide one day at a time.

Praying for you dearly. May My God supply all your needs according to His riches in Glory.

 

[timothyu]

Finally, with a history such as yours, getting job is going to require a lot of networking.

Perhaps the church could step up and practice what is preached.

 

[Kimosabe2019]

I'm always astonished with how being evil , robbing people, selling drugs, being ruthless, gossiping, slanderous, these people are all living a life of luxury. All they had to do was allow Satan into their lives and he allowed them earthly riches. The only thing that saves me in my thinking is the "Who is more powerful? God or Satan?" and of course we know the answer to that one. Why must we suffer so? I know that God is allowing people to see the contrast between The Devils way and Gods way. But shouldn't it be just a tiny bit easier?

Whatever happened to his promises:

11 The Lord will grant you abundant prosperity—in the fruit of your womb, the young of your livestock and the crops of your ground—in the land he swore to your ancestors to give you.
12 The Lord will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none.
13 The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.
14 Do not turn aside from any of the commands I give you today, to the right or to the left, following other gods and serving them?

 

[zephcom]

Perhaps the church could step up and practice what is preached.

I would think the church would be part of one's networking.

 

[timothyu]

Whatever happened to his promises:

His promises apply to the rewards of his making, not of mankind's concept of what is valuable.

Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

 

[timothyu]

I would think the church would be part of one's networking.

Yes and due to forgiveness the criminal record would not be a problem for any in a position to offer employment.