Can someone tell me what makes a relationship..a relationship?

Take Heart · Aug 7, 2018

It doesn't have to be an intimate relationship, it can be friendship. I'm asking because I read about God daily through reading His Word..and yet..I feel distant. Like all I'm doing is just reading while my heart longs to have an actual relationship with Jesus. I've been a Christian since 2012. So not exactly new. I'm at a 'dry' spiritual season right now and I feel like reading His Word is not enough, you know? Like there's got to be something MORE.

So back to my question..

What makes a relationship..a relationship? Like if you and I were to meet as acquaintances and just hang out ..what would make the 'acquaintance' status a 'friendship'?

All I can think are..
1. Spending time with you [something I think I do when I read God's Word and sing/worship]
2. Talking to you [I pray daily]
3. Getting to know you.. [I read His Word..but I think there's a difference between reading /about/ someone and /knowing/ someone. Anyone can read about any celebrity..but do they really know them?]
4. ...?

I just don't know how to have a relationship with Jesus. I feel like something is missing.
I need your perspective. I need to know what makes a relationship..authentic and real and meaningful..

Halbhh · Aug 7, 2018

Even though you already believe, really do this -- https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+7:7-12&version=NIV

One thing that really helps me a lot is that when I pray, I know I am really speaking (actually!) to Him, to my Father (!)....

And when I read in a gospel, and Christ Jesus says something, I can slow down and really listen, hearing it, to hear His words, and to really listen, and hear Him talking. This is very central -- "My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me." We are to truly listen as we read His words. https://biblehub.com/niv/john/10.htm (as you read, take your time! These are the most eternal words, which He says will endure even after this current heaven and earth pass away; Start in chapter 1 and verse 1, and read as slow as you like, because even to read just one gospel with true listening is better than to read the Bible many times through without true listening.)

vinsight4u · Aug 7, 2018

Heart2Soul · Aug 7, 2018

I understand what you are saying....I had a problem having a relationship with God because of how I RELATED my views of Him....I feared Him as a dictator/communist type God who would send me to Hell and I would burn forever if I sinned. Then I had an encounter with Him in my prayer time and He revealed Himself to me in such a loving way as my FATHER.....never having had a father in my life this was all new to me....and a loving Father at that! After that I went to Him about EVERYTHING...lol....He was my confidant..the only one who understood me and that could RELATE to me...it was a Revelation Knowledge of Him I received when He revealed Himself to me.....So I do remember during that time I was seeking Him....daily in the Bible, in prayer, in books, in church....I was pursuing with a passion to know Him.....and as His word says....if you seek Me you will find Me...….
I am sure it is unique to each individual....but that is my story. God Bless

Willing-heart · Aug 7, 2018

The foundation in which a friendship with God can ever be established is faith in God that connects us to God.

In spite of all of his weaknesses and failure, Faith is what made Abraham to be God’s friend (Isaiah 41:8) even to the point that God shared his thoughts with him (Genesis 18:17).
Faith is what caused Enoch to walk with God on this side of heaven and be literally translated to the other side of heaven as he walked with God (Hebrews 11:5).
In spite of his weakness, failure and sin, Faith is what made David to be a friend of God. God even testified that by saying (in Acts 13:22), “I saw David’s heart after my own heart.”
From the story of Saul conversion to Paul (In Acts 9), faith is what can turn an enemy of God to become a friend of God.

God extended His hand of friendship to us by giving up His one and only Son Jesus to die for us on a cross so to connect us to the heart of our Heavenly Father. Above all else, choosing Jesus, loving Jesus, identifying with Jesus unashamedly, being concern about what concerns the heart of Jesus, being anxious to please Him above everyone else and longing to spend more time with Him are all indicator that you are a friend of God.

https://femiroyalblog.com/2017/11/28/everlasting-godly-friendship/

A_Thinker · Aug 7, 2018

Read about Jesus. Focus upon the things that he said and did.

Find a book which discusses Jesus as a person. Watch a movie about Jesus' life (I like Jesus of Nazareth).

Take a look at this article of Jesus ...
https://www.faithgateway.com/humanity-of-jesus/#.W2ol8NJKjIU

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royal priest · Aug 7, 2018

Your question strikes at the very heart of what it means to be a true Christian. Ezekiel 37:27
One very important thing to realize regarding relationships is the nature of a relationship. The nature of a particular relationship ought to be a huge factor in how we live out that relationship such as our obligations in the relationship, level of intimacy, trust, commitment, etc.
God tells us that He is like a Father to His children, (Psalms 103:13), King over all (Revelation 19:6), the Judge of the Earth (Psalms 82:8). Jesus is our Prophet (Hebrews 1:2), Priest (Hebrews 4:14), and King (Hebrews 1:8). He is like a brother (Hebrews 2:11). He is an advocate or representative for His sinful church before the holy God (1 John 2:1). He is the Lamb slain for sinners (John 1:29).
All of these have profound implications in how we ought to relate to God .
It's a popular question to ask, "do you have a personal relationship with Jesus?"
But, everyone, regardless of their feelings toward Jesus, do have a personal relationship with Him whether they realize it or not. By virtue of our responses to God, we are either with Him or against Him (Luke 11:23). After all, He is the Creator and Provider of all that we are and have. He expects us to offer our entire being in devotion to Him (Romans 12:1).

He has provided every means to enable us to do so. He has given us His Son to grant us entrance into His presence, taught us how to pray, provided local churches to publically worship Him, and given us His Word to teach us how to carry out this relationship which He calls us into.
God is jealous for your love and takes great delight in your service to Him (through faith in Jesus).
The best way of living out such a relationship with God is by humbly submitting to His will for you in all things out of intense gratitude for what He has done, in Christ, to grant you eternal life.

Job3315 · Aug 7, 2018

Even though Jesus is our friend and we can come to Him to have a relationship with Him, I think the reason He wants us to get close to Him is so He can show us who we are, our identity, to then be ambassadors of His Presence on earth. The Bible says on Mark 16 that these signs will follow to those who believe... cast our demons...heal the sick, etc. So, our relationship with the Lord must bring Fruit.

Go back to the last time you felt He spoke and ask yourself if you are missing something. For example, maybe He wants you to grow in friendship with other people, so go find a friend. Then come back to Him and talk to Him about that relationship.

StephenDiscipleofYHWH · Aug 7, 2018

4. Fellowship and works
A. Fellowship with other Christians is important as the Lord is with you whenever two or three are gathered in his name(Matt 18:20) so you may be able to feel his presence more so than by yourself.

2. Giving to the poor, helping them in any way as the apostles did, wash their feet, give them food, and preach the gospel to them. In doing so you will see the good that comes from being a Christian and dong the Lords work.

With these two things, along with everything else you already do, you will feel alive in the spirit and connected to Lord.

Take Heart · Aug 7, 2018

@Halbhh Thank you for the thoughtful reminder of taking my time in reading and the greatest command of all

Take Heart · Aug 7, 2018

@vinsight4u Thank you for that. I'll try to keep those things in mind in my walk with Him. I feel like I need to view Him as if He's actually here with me in physical form or perhaps just simply present-which He is. It's my own unique way of relating to Him in order to interact with Him.

@Heart2Soul I'm glad you had such a beautiful encounter with Him. I definitely need to see Him more as a Father. It's definitely easy to view Him, especially when one wanders a bit from the relationship, as a punisher/Judge solely even though He is a Judge but also a loving and patient Father Who wants nothing more than to help us grow and learn in Him and have a relationship with Him. Definitely blessed by your experience. Thanks for sharing!

@Willing-heart Faith is definitely a vital part of one's walk and relationship with Him. Thank you for that reminder. Thanks as well for the link. I've read through it- it's beautifully and thoughtfully written.

@A_Thinker Thank you for that. I think I often forget that Jesus was also a man just as He was God. That He, too, felt emotions and has gone through so much that we go through that He is able to empathise with us and our weaknesses.

@royal priest Thank you, that was beautifully written. I'm starting to realise the 'relationships' in general require vulnerability and, of course, commitment.

@Job3315 Thank you for the reminder that bringing forth good fruit for His glory is important in a relationship with Him and to ask Him what He wants me to do next.

@StephenDiscipleofYHWH Thanks for the reminder Stephen. I have definitely felt close to Him whenever I serve Him by serving others. Very much alive in the spirit indeed.

Sketcher · Aug 7, 2018

Relationships tend to be built on trust, love, and communication. All three grow over time, resulting in the relationship getting closer. Trust is earned, a bit at a time. Acts of love that speak to the person's heart are discovered over time. (These are not just romantic, in a friendship context it can be doing meaningful favors, or shaking a hand, or verbal encouragement - you know what your friend likes, you do it, the friendship grows.) Communication becomes more authentic and meaningful over time, usually as more trust is earned.

These are not to be absent from our relationship with God. What do these look like?

Trust - to trust in God is to have faith in him, and our faith is to grow.
Love - God has made his own "love language" clear - obedience (John 14:21 and also verse 15). A good case can also be made for meaningful praise and worship. The more we speak that to him, the more of himself he reveals to us as we walk with him.
Communication - Prayer is how we talk to him. There's also listening to what his Spirit would have us do. If you're unsure of where to start listening, do the good that is in front of you to do, for that is our purpose (Ephesians 2:10). As you grow in this and in prayer, you may hear from God more.

Is it religious? Yes, it's the good kind of religion. True and relational religion.

Take Heart · Aug 8, 2018

@Sketcher Thank you..that was beautifully written and helpful.

yeshuaslavejeff · Aug 8, 2018

Have you been crucified with Christ yet ?

Llleopard · Aug 8, 2018

When I realised I could talk with the holy spirit, my life suddenly became much more interesting. Growing up in an open brethren faith, it had never occurred to me that we could address him and build relationship with him. Maybe try talking with him as well as Jesus and God the father and see what happens?

yeshuaslavejeff · Aug 8, 2018

Smile. A lot of people talk to 'God'..........

His sheep HEAR His Voice, Listen to Him and Follow Him, and will not follow another.

Some asked "How can we hear God's voice?"

Wait on Him. Wait for Him. Seek Him continually, Listening for His still quiet voice.

He is not far away, as if we have to go up to heaven to find Him.....

He is very near. Sadly, few listen to Him. So also few hear Him.

Read His Word as often as possible, daily, frequently. Meditate on His Word all the time.

Llleopard · Aug 8, 2018

Yes. That's why I said talk 'with', not talk 'to'. The listening is way more important

AnnaDeborah · Aug 8, 2018

Bear in mind that He is still there regardless of your feelings. Sometimes I have a greater sense of God's presence than others, but He is still there. His presence isn't dependent on my feelings. Keep spending time talking with Him and reading His word even if you don't 'feel' anything. And ask Him to help you to live each day to please Him.

Sometimes, I am saddened that my relationship isn't deeper, but when I look back, I know that it is deeper than it has been in the past. It is just that the more I know the Lord, the more I want to know! But in this life, we are always going to be longing for more, because we are waiting for the time He calls us home.

Greg J. · Aug 10, 2018

It is easier to think about if you don't try to understand "relationship," but try to understand a "good relationship." (You'll come to understand the former this way, too.) What will you find in a good relationship between a Father and daughter? Two friends? Spouses? Brothers and sisters? Less important if you are obedient, but still useful, is understanding what a good relationship is between a master and a servant and a master and a slave.

When you have concrete answers, then it won't be so difficult to answer the question, what is a good relationship between our God and you? The answer contains pieces of each of the above-mentioned relationships. When you have been faithful in keeping your side of the relationship in good condition, you can expect to experience God's good and faithful side, too.

Jenniferdiana · Aug 10, 2018

not sure but read this verse John 14:21, maybe keep the commandments and obey him, show diligence put on Christ and walk in him, i dont know, the holy spirit is with us though, start with that by getting to know and connect with him in the spirit, just be and work with the holy spirit and grow and become one with it and him, when we do that Jesus is manifested in us and around us bit by bit each time until we reach the fullness of him and feel his presence more. you cant ignore the holy spirit and try to have a relationship with him..they go one and one ha

Can someone tell me what makes a relationship..a relationship?

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