- Aug 15, 2017
- 13
- 4
- 41
- Country
- Australia
- Faith
- Skeptic
- Marital Status
- Private
Hi,
Firstly, I am sorry if my contemplation accidentally offends someone, I just ask that you see the sincerity in my questioning. I am not trying to unseat your beliefs. I am trying to find God, but my heart and mind have so many questions and concerns.
I am trying really hard to believe in your God. I don't want to go to hell and I would love to find some peace and consistent satisfaction in my life. But I really have never felt an undeniable experience of God's existence. Maybe I am too blind or stubborn. I totally admit I have done wrong and committed sin. I ask God to forgive me, but I don't know how to know that I have come to know the trinity (God, Jesus & the Holy Spirit) or whatever it is exactly I am supposed to experience when I ask for forgiveness. It sounds like most Christians say that if I ask for forgiveness in a sincere manner that God will guide me. I keep trying to have an experience of God or to feel\hear\understand\experience this guidance, but I am still not getting it in a way that I understand. I am unconvinced.
I also am totally confused by the following passages from the "Save yourself some pain" section of a Christian website:
"When cults tell you that you must acknowledge God's name to be saved, that you must worship on a certain day that you must be baptized by an elder of their church, don't panic. Merely go back to the Instruction Manual. The Bible has all the answers, and searching them out, will make you grow."
I thought Christians did believe that you had to acknowledge God's name in order to be saved, that you had to worship on a Sunday etc. This is one of the most confusing things I am finding as I try to find God. Denominations! How do I know which one is the true path??? They all claim basically they same thing with a few minor changes here and there and they all claim that THEY are the only true path.
I also hear the claim, Just read the bible. It is gods recipe for you. BUT! which bible! there are hundreds of translations, which one is the true one?
Also heretics! Every time I find myself relating to a Christian and thinking to myself; "Yeah! their explanation of God or Jesus really resonates with me." I find some other Christian express a view that the former Christian is a heretic for this or that reason.
In short, I don't seem to be able to hear from God for certain so far. I have a conscience and a heart to find truth. I admit I am a sinner and I ask Jesus to forgive me. But I am still lost in a sea of not knowing which is the true advice/religious path from God in the world. I just don't get it. All the orthodox Christian stuff seems so unappealing to me. I am worried that I have committed a sin against the Holy Spirit and that maybe I can't hear God because I am already eternally damned. That scares me, but the multitudes denominations and orthodoxy and incompatibility with my own life experience makes it so hard to find God.
Thanks for listening to my rambling.
Firstly, I am sorry if my contemplation accidentally offends someone, I just ask that you see the sincerity in my questioning. I am not trying to unseat your beliefs. I am trying to find God, but my heart and mind have so many questions and concerns.
I am trying really hard to believe in your God. I don't want to go to hell and I would love to find some peace and consistent satisfaction in my life. But I really have never felt an undeniable experience of God's existence. Maybe I am too blind or stubborn. I totally admit I have done wrong and committed sin. I ask God to forgive me, but I don't know how to know that I have come to know the trinity (God, Jesus & the Holy Spirit) or whatever it is exactly I am supposed to experience when I ask for forgiveness. It sounds like most Christians say that if I ask for forgiveness in a sincere manner that God will guide me. I keep trying to have an experience of God or to feel\hear\understand\experience this guidance, but I am still not getting it in a way that I understand. I am unconvinced.
I also am totally confused by the following passages from the "Save yourself some pain" section of a Christian website:
"When cults tell you that you must acknowledge God's name to be saved, that you must worship on a certain day that you must be baptized by an elder of their church, don't panic. Merely go back to the Instruction Manual. The Bible has all the answers, and searching them out, will make you grow."
I thought Christians did believe that you had to acknowledge God's name in order to be saved, that you had to worship on a Sunday etc. This is one of the most confusing things I am finding as I try to find God. Denominations! How do I know which one is the true path??? They all claim basically they same thing with a few minor changes here and there and they all claim that THEY are the only true path.
I also hear the claim, Just read the bible. It is gods recipe for you. BUT! which bible! there are hundreds of translations, which one is the true one?
Also heretics! Every time I find myself relating to a Christian and thinking to myself; "Yeah! their explanation of God or Jesus really resonates with me." I find some other Christian express a view that the former Christian is a heretic for this or that reason.
In short, I don't seem to be able to hear from God for certain so far. I have a conscience and a heart to find truth. I admit I am a sinner and I ask Jesus to forgive me. But I am still lost in a sea of not knowing which is the true advice/religious path from God in the world. I just don't get it. All the orthodox Christian stuff seems so unappealing to me. I am worried that I have committed a sin against the Holy Spirit and that maybe I can't hear God because I am already eternally damned. That scares me, but the multitudes denominations and orthodoxy and incompatibility with my own life experience makes it so hard to find God.
Thanks for listening to my rambling.